1 Goodbye

It was nighttime.

Zhi Ruo was currently playing PC games cooped up in her room, the bright light of the screen bounced off her thick-rimmed glasses, almost slipping off her nose.

The bags under her eyes were apparent from continuously staying up late. Her face had been bleached white by light from the monitor, making her face pale as a vampire. Her previous evenly toned and slightly tanned skin gone with each passing day.

She had not talked to Mo Chou for a few days now. Especially since the incident before they graduated from highschool. She didn't want to disturb him at such an important point in his life. He was probably getting ready to enroll at China's most prestigious university.

Zhi Ruo found herself beaming while she nonchalantly played PC games, occasionally drinking water to keep her from falling asleep. She did not like drinking energy drinks nor coffee.

"I wonder what's he doing right now? Probably studying his ass off since he's such a workaholic," Zhi Ruo snorted. As expected of the number one student at Huang Academy.

Even though she also studied very hard, she knew how to let loose and have fun. Because she naturally inherited her IQ from her parents, she was ranked third in her entire grade. Everyone knew that she could do better but her laziness held her back.

It amazed her that Huang Academy accepted anyone with money. She'll be sure to take over Huang Academy when she soon becomes the head of the family. It was the least she could do. After all, she spent five years studying there. She had atleast some sort of gratitude towards her teachers.

With her thoughts wandering, her phone chimed with a notification. Zhi Ruo snapped from her daydreaming and glanced at the person who messaged her. Delight flashed across her eyes as she discarded the game she was playing and focus her full attention on the screen before her.

She plopped on her own bed and read the message she received.

[Hey. How are you?]

A simple greeting from him was enough to make her giddy with excitement. She quickly replied.

[Staying up late playing games again as usual.]

It took him a while to reply.

[Don't overwork yourself, it's bad staying up late. And sorry about the other day.]

Zhi Ruo became confused. Why did he feel sorry?

It was about three days ago when Zhi Ruo decided to visit Mo Chou. They were supposed to be meeting up at school but because she had no one to go with, she didn't want to go. Though guilt overcame her and thus, she persuaded one of her friends to come check if he left their house to supposedly meet up with her.

It was around lunchtime when they arrived. She was only supposed to check on him but then his mother invited them inside the house and talked to them for a whole three hours! This made her feel a bit embarassed, especially when his mother did not want her to leave so early.

His mother's hospitable and kind attitude made her heart warm but unfortunately she couldn't stay long. Perhaps he caught on to her troubled expression and thought that his mother caused her trouble?

Zhi Ruo shook her head.

[The heck? There's no need to be sorry. I actually enjoyed myself and Mrs. Mo is a wonderful person. I just needed to go home that day, that's all.] Zhi Ruo wanted to laugh out loud.

Mo Chou was the type of person who easily assumed things. That's why Zhi Ruo didn't hesitate to explain what happened that day.

[But still... I'm still sorry. To be honest, it took me a lot of courage to tell you what I felt.]

Huh? What's with the sudden bringing up of his confession?

[You're the sole person that I talk to every single day. You're also the very first person that i've come to care for. I love you very much.]

Zhi Ruo found herself shocked. But instead of feeling touched, an uneasy feeling rose from her stomach.

[I've long prayed that we can properly fix our relationship but I can't.]

Her fingers began to tremble as she continued to stare at her phone. Could it be…?

[I had promised myself that I wanted to focus on my studies first. I have a lot of responsibilities and duties. I want to become a person that can make my parents proud.]

[But I can't do this. You helped me get over my addiction to games but instead, you replaced it. And I need to sacrifice some things.]

'You seriously can't be doing this to me…'

[I'm sorry. I wanted to tell this in person but we might never meet again so I'll just say it. I just want you to know that I love you very much and you're the most precious person to me. Nothing will ever change that. So I'm sorry.]

'Laughable! Breaking up in chat? How much more humiliating can it get?'

Zhi Ruo's fingers hovered over the keyboard of her phone as she thought of what to say. But because her trembling fingers, she became unable to type properly, causing her phone to drop to the ground.

6 years!

She had loved him since they were eleven! All these years of supporting him and staying by his side, never failing to remind him that she loved him and she can wait…

When he finally answered her two months ago, she happily cried tears of joy and even hugged him so tight. The promise of cherishing each other still so vivid in her mind.

Yet, who could've thought… She had ignored the people around her that were against them. She was so loyal to him that she rejected the proposal of several guys around her, saying that there would only be one man in her heart.

Could this be karma?

After all, it was her decision.

She could only blame herself for falling in love with the wrong person.

Despite this, her whole body trembled and tears formed in her eyes. She struggled to suppress the tears and trembling.

After a few deep breathes, she picked up the fallen phone, her fingers hovering over the keyboard as she thought of what to say.

It was like a bitter pill that she was forced to swallow. The sweet memories of being together flashed in her mind. She had no choice but to accept the outcome.

[I'm sorry too… It was my mistake to ever think that we could be together. This relationship of ours, though short, was sweet. Thank you, for everything.]

She saw that the message had been sent and quickly followed it up by another message.

[Also, you're a fucking idiot for telling this to me in chat. With this, it's over. Bye.]

Zhi Ruo closed her eyes and breathed.

Bang!

She violently threw her phone across the room and huffed heavily. She wanted to scream. Wanted to throw a tantrum. She wanted to break things.

Her body trembled. Her feet were wobbly as she stumbled on the swivel chair.

"HAHAHAHAHA! ZHI RUO, HOW HUMILIATING IS IT TO BE DUMPED THROUGH CHAT?! WAS IT WORTH IT?! LOVING A MAN WHO CANNOT EVEN MAKE UP HIS OWN MIND?!"

Her hysterical laughter filled the silent room as the moon shone down on her face. It continued on like that till her laughter turned to sobs. Her body fell on the floor but she paid no heed to it.

She wanted to cry. Her lips quivered and her body violently shook as she sat there in the darkness. She let out cries of despair as she quietly laid there on the cold hardwood floor. But no tears fell out.

"What did I do wrong…?"

She crawled to a secluded corner of the room, curling up into a ball and rocking her body back and forth. The room that was previously filled with hysterical laughter and cries of despair was now filled with a suffocating silence that drowned out a person's senses.

She continuously sat there all night as she allowed herself to surrender to the darkness and the suffocating silence.