5 The crush

The heart is a strange organ

It never seeks permission

Neither does it require protection

For when it gets captivated

There is no one that can save it.

Not even the owner

Just the thief

~Humeyra

It has been weeks since the meeting day and I have adapted well to my fake version. I was myself when alone but with others I was not. My kidney was becoming a problem again. I have had kidney stones before but it has recently started to ache again. I was staying with a sister in my apartment who become one of my best friends within the few weeks that I have spent in the university. I was forced to tell Aisha about my health condition since she was the closest person to me whenever am by myself. The first time she noticed was when I couldn't move due to the muscle crumps I felt after my dialysis session which was so intense to an extent that I couldn't help but whimper in pain. After that day, she has been my constant helper and she would accompany me to each of my dialysis sessions. She has also been making sure that I didn't skip any of my routine checkup. She offered to take me herself the next day. I went with Aisha the next day afraid to know what was really wrong this time. The doctor took some blood samples and other tests including body scans. He requested that I take a lot of rest for the time being and promised to give me a call once my medical results were out. We left the hospital and I decided to go to my favorite spot in the university to think. It was a secluded place which was known to few people. I bought some candy, chocolate and ice cream, Choco stick to be specific and sat down on the large stone under the big tree. Many people would say that I am a spoilt rich girl but I know better. My wealth was not an inheritance but self-made but nobody needed to know that for now. Besides who would believe that an 18 year old Lady would own a high cooperative company that is ran by her many hired managers and she is the C.E.O of the halal Jamil cloth line that had several branches all over the world .I had so many different businesses but no one needed to know about them. While I was in school, I left my foster father in charge of all the businesses as a signatory though I still get to participate in decision making if it's a matter of investment. Though am the youngest and wealthiest person in the eastern part of the world, my spending habit is not out of hand Alhamdulillah.Also,very few people actually know how I look like and that I own almost half of my countries businesses. You might wonder what am doing in school with such wealth. Well I always liked drawing and architecture was my dream career hence that is what brought me here to study .I was deprived of a normal childhood but I would try and live a normal teenage life. I was so lost in thought that I didn't realize I had company, I was brought out of my thoughts by the sound of someone clearing their throats. I screamed startled. I am not normally easily rattled but whenever I get immersed in my past it makes me weak to the core. Clenching my fist on my speeding heart, looked up with the intention to lash out . Behold, the sight that greeted me was of someone who has plagued my sleep and invaded my thoughts even when I was wide awake. Asalamu aleikum warahmatullahi wabarakatu Humeyra. Am sorry I scared you, he said.

Wa... wa... wa aleikum salaam warahmatullahi wabarakatu. I stuttered swallowing to sooth my suddenly very dry throat. Ya wadud, Subhanallah. He is so handsome, the smile, the eyes, the nose, his perfect cheeks and a very tempting beard. I couldn't look away. Uuuuumm... I tried to talk but nothing came out of my mouth. He smiled and lowered his penetrating gaze. I realize that you have been here alone for sometimes and you look worried. Are you alright ukhti? He asked. I didn't like him calling me his sister. Ugggh. I wanted him. Physically, intimately. I wanted him as a husband. I couldn't help imagining myself holding him, kiss... ahem. I was once again brought out of my day dream by the man who I now realized I had a crush on.Astaghfirullah, what was I thinking about! I thought. Am sorry, I am having some problems but I will be alright. I responded. He then said something that made me look up so amazed and hypnotized by him. Laa tahzan, inna Allahu maana. Allahu Akbar, how could someone be so perfect? I blatted out without thinking. He looked up at me surprised and wide eyed. I looked away blushing and asked, would you be my friend Hamdan? He looked at me unsure for it was against our religion. He was about to say no when I looked at him with so much pain in my eyes and pleaded, please Hamdan, I need a friend and I don't trust easy but I trust you. I need someone who knows about my condition in case something happens to me. I need a brother who can lift my spirit like you just did. Please Hamdan, don't abandon me. I said desperately. I was feeling so vulnerable at that very moment. I have never shown anyone how weak I was emotionally and yet he had brought it out of me without trying. I felt like I needed him more that the air I breathe for the rest of my life. I looked away anticipating his rejection and the pain that would come with it. I am sorry. I apologized as I stood up to walk away his voice halted me in my steps. Humeyra? He called to me. Na'am, I replied.

Hand me your phone ukhti. I gave him my phone without thinking twice. He called his phone using mine and saved his number in my phone. Then he walked away after handing me my phone. I took the phone and smiled. He didn't have to give me an answer. I already got my answer. I think am falling for you Hamdan. I thought smiling.

Ikhtilat

Praise be to Allah.

The meeting together, mixing, and intermingling of men and women in one place, the crowding of them together, and the revealing and exposure of women to men are prohibited by the Law of Islam (Sharia). These acts are prohibited because they are among the causes for fitnah (temptation or trial which implies evil consequences), the arousing of desires, and the committing of indecency and wrongdoing.

Among the many proofs of prohibition of the meeting and mixing of men and women in the Qur'an and Sunnah are:

Verse No. 53 of Surat al-Ahzab, or the Confederates (Interpretation of the meaning); "...for anything ye want, ask them from before a screen: that makes for greater purity for your hearts and for theirs..."

In explaining this Verse, Ibn Kathir (May Allah have mercy on him) said: "Meaning, as I forbade you to enter their rooms, I forbid you to look at them at all. If one wants to take something from them, one should do so without looking at them. If one wants to ask a woman for something, the same has to be done from behind a screen."

The Prophet (May peace and blessings be upon him) enforced separation of men and women even at Allah's most revered and preferred place, the mosque. This was accomplished via the separation of the women's rows from the men's; men were asked to stay in the mosque after completion of the obligatory prayer so that women will have enough time to leave the mosque; and, a special door was assigned to women. Evidence of the foregoing are:

Umm Salaam (May Allah be pleased with her) said that after Allah's Messenger (May peace and blessings be upon him) said "as-Salamu 'Alaykum wa Rahmatullah' twice announcing the end of prayer, women would stand up and leave. He would stay for a while before leaving. Ibn Shihab said that he thought that the staying of the Prophet (May peace and blessings be upon him) was in order for the women to be able to leave before the men who wanted to depart." Narrated by al-Bukhari under No. 793.

Abu Dawood under No. 876 narrates the same hadith in Kitab al-Salaat under the title "Insiraaf an-Nisaa' Qabl al-Rijaal min al-Salaah" (Departure of Women before Men after the Prayer). Ibn 'Umar said that Allah's Messenger (May peace and blessings be upon him) said: "We should leave this door (of the mosque) for women." Naafi' said: "Ibn 'Umar never again entered through that door until he died." Narrated by Abu Dawood under No. 484 in "Kitab as-Salah" under the Chapter entitled: "at-Tashdid fi Thalik".

Abu Hurayrah said that the Prophet (May peace and blessings be upon him) said: ""The best of the men's rows is the first and the worst is the last, and the best of the women's rows is the last and the worst in the first." Narrated by Muslim under No. 664.

This is the greatest evidence that the Law of Islam (Shari'ah) forbids meeting and mixing of men and women. The farther the men are from the women's rows, the better, and vice versa.

If these procedures and precautions were prescribed and adhered to in a mosque, which is a pure place of worship where people are as far away as they ever are from the arousal of desire and temptation, then no doubt the same procedures need to be followed even more rigorously at other places.

Abu Usayd al-Ansari narrated that he heard Allah's Messenger (May peace and blessings be upon him) say to the women on his way out of the mosque when he saw men and women mixing together on their way home:

'Give way (i.e., walk to the sides) as it is not appropriate for you to walk in the middle the road.' Thereafter, women would walk so close to the wall that their dresses would get caught on it. Narrated by Abu Dawood in "Kitab al-Adab min Sunanihi, Chapter: Mashyu an-Nisa Ma' ar-Rijal fi at-Tariq."We know that the intermingling, mixing and crowding together of men and women is part of today's unavoidable yet regrettable affliction in most places, such as markets, hospitals, colleges, etc., but:

· We will not willfully choose or accept mixing and crowding, particularly in religious classes and council meetings in Islamic Centers.

· We take precautions to avoid meeting and mixing of men and women as much as possible while at the same time achieving desired goals and objectives. This result can be achieved by designating separate places assigned for men and women, using different doors for each, utilizing modern means of communication such as microphones, video recorders etc., and expediting efforts to have enough female teachers to teach women, etc.

· We show fear of Allah as much as we can by not looking at members of the opposite sex and by applying self-restraint.