2 Chapter 2: University Blues

Nelos

3 Years Later

"I got my acceptance to California University," Shaye says from my bedroom door, waving the letter in her hand. Her smile is incredibly wide, it's spectacular. Glossy lips, white teeth, and I want to kiss her.

But unease hooks into my chest at seeing her cheer. It has nothing to do with jealousy, but a promise I made her three years ago. A promise I plan to keep.

"That's incredible, angel. I'm so proud of you." I greet her halfway across my large bedroom and lift her off her feet, swinging her around in my arms.

She giggles, and it's the most beautiful sound in the world. Lowering her to her feet, she slides down my body, those soft breasts like small balloons brushing over my chest. They're sumptuous, and all I can picture are the rosy tips of her nipples. My dick pushes hard against the zipper of my jeans. She always has this effect on me.

"We need to celebrate," she insists and breaks into giggles.

I stare at her beauty, at her enthusiasm, and all I want is to draw her into me.

"I have something for you," I say and cross the room to shut the door. My parents are in the living room, and this is something between Shaye and me, something that's played on my mind for the past year, something I planned to do next month at the county fair. But I can't wait any longer. She needs to know before we make plans. Inside I feel like bees are sticking my insides.

"Take a seat on the bed." I guide her by the shoulders to sit while I hurry over to my study desk. I pull open the first drawer and as my eyes land on the small black box, my heart starts pounding. Nerves are dancing over my skin. Of course, she'll agree. We've talked about this for years. And I'm ready. We're ready. She's the only one for me. She gets me in ways no one ever has.

I turn toward her with a grin and sweat beads down my back. I shouldn't be nervous, yet I am.

"I fell in love with you from the first moment we met, from the first time I made love to you, from the first night we spent together at camp." I bend down on one knee and flip open the ring box. "Shaye, will you marry me?"

Her eyes widen, her gorgeous mouth drops opens. "My dreams are with you," she begins, her voice shaky, and my stomach does that horrible thing where it tightens when something bad is about to happen. "You know that, but I-I"

She doesn't finish her sentence.

I can't breathe as I stare at her looking away. What is she so confused about? We are meant to do this, we both agreed.

"What is it?" I remain kneeling before her, holding the box as a tremble crawls up my spine.

"Nelos, you're my everything, you know that. It's just," she lifts her gaze, "I don't think we should rush into this."

"Rush into it? We've been talking about it for years. I'm - " My heart is beating hard, and I'm trying to hold it together, to understand what she's talking about.

"Baby," she says with a mix of patience and sweetness that makes my stomach fall into my feet.

She falls to her knees in front of me, cups my hands in hers, and the lid to the ring box flips shut. The sound shatters my heart. It crumbles and breaks like fucking glass through me. I've wanted nothing else for so long, and now she's pushing me away? She hasn't said she's breaking up with me but might as well be. I know I'm being selfish. But fuck! I feel like she's choosing school over me-over us.

"I want to wait until I finish my degree. It's in California. A full scholarship, Nelos. Top school in the country for education. My dream. Come with me?" The hope in her eyes sparkles, but she knows I can't. I pull my hand free from hers and climb to my feet.

I frown and a fury rushes through my veins. "I can't leave. Cali is on the other side of the states. Might as well be on another planet. I just got into first-string at the college here in Boston. Comes with a bonus if I stay. No one else is going to offer me this." My fingers curl tight around the box. It feels like a knife stabbing right through my hand, tearing at me. Took me an extra year at a junior college to get noticed by the major university in town.

"Why can't you get the same thing in California? Maybe even better?" she asks hopefully, but nothing can help the weight settling in on my chest.

"You know I can't." I shake my head and push the box into my pocket, but still it is there, pressing into my side, reminding me Shaye and I don't want the same thing. Now the ring I saved up for over the past year sits heavily in my pocket and I feel like an idiot. A fool. A fucking sucker. "I've given my word and signed a contract. Why can't you just go to school here? Hell, Shaye, we talked about this. You had applied at colleges in town--how did you get an acceptance from freaking California?"

Her bottom lip sticks out, tempting me. A seductress without even trying. "Because this is one of my dreams. I-I never thought they'd respond. I sent in my application over a month ago and thought they'd denied me when I didn't hear back. But, Nelos, this is the best program in the country."

She takes a step toward me, her hand out for me and I step back, crossing my arms. If I let her touch me, I won't be able to do this. Won't be able to say no to her. We made an agreement to stick together through everything and never be apart and now she's breaking her promise, breaking my heart.

"And you know how hard I've worked to get my offer too." I swallow against my tightening throat. If I go with her to California, we'll both be sorry. This is our chance for a future. Moving forward with the football contract is a guarantee that we won't have to scrape and save for every little thing, like I've had to do my entire shitty life. Teachers don't earn shit.

Give it all up now? I can't. I won't be like my foster dad, depending on his wife's salary while I guzzle beer and shoot up.

"I can't throw it all away and hope to get something in California. Fuck, Shaye, there's thousands of demi-gods over there with the gods using that place as their vacation spot."

"But you'll be on the other side of the country. Can't you at least do your time mojo and fix this?" she asks, clicking her fingers as if everything is so easily fixed with a bit of magic.

Images flash of her unhappy and resenting me because we got married and she had to drop out of school because of us having kids.

"Doesn't work that way and you know it," I say, already knowing the outcome, I see it crystal clear now, and I want to fucking shout at her, make her see I can't live without her. Distance relationships don't work for a reason. My chest is tearing up.

"Come on, you're not making this easy for us." She gives me a tentative smile, tears build up in her turquoise eyes as she pushes back her blue-black hair. "We can get married after we graduate. A-and you can make time speed up faster, right?"

"Only in spurts." I pull the ring box out of my pocket and thrust it back into my drawer. I slam it shut a little too loudly.

"Look, let's just wait. A year or two won't change anyth-"

"Yes, it will." I spin, sorrow and anger threading through my veins. How can she do this? How can she want to be apart for so long? "We won't be the same in a year-in six months even without each other."

"Please, Nelos," she whispers, "don't do this. Don't make me choose."

I straighten, putting on my game face so she doesn't see me breaking on the inside. No way will I stand in her way or witness the look of remorse and animosity etched on her face like my vision.

"The choice has already been made." To soften the blow and maybe hold onto what I know is a lie, so I don't crumble at her feet, I say, "We'll do it your way, Shaye. After we finish college."

She gives me a sad smile and reaches up for me on her tiptoes. Her lips are as sweet as always, but there's a bitter-sweetness I taste now. I know without any glimpses of the future that this is the last time I will see her for what feels like forever. And I hold onto her a second longer than I should, hoping to keep myself together.