The Boy Who Loved

Every time Chris didn't want to be found, she made sure that nobody could find her and this time was no different. Even after looking for hours in the entire Grimauld place, Harry, Ginny, Luna, Colin, Ron, and the Black family house elf, Kreature couldn't find her. 

"That's it, I don't think Chris is in Grimauld Place," Ron said sighing. "If she was here we could have found her by now."

"She is not answering her talisman either," Colin said looking very worried. 

Harry was extremely quiet throughout the search, his stomach was in a knot and he had this growing sinking feeling inside of him as time passed. He looked around the stairs one more time only to find Hermione standing in a corner. And something inside him snapped.

"Where did she run off to —?" Ginny was saying something but Harry couldn't wait for her to finish.

Everyone was worried about Chris again only because Hermione thought this was the best time to insult Chris and for what? Him?

"Was that really necessary, Hermione?" Harry burst out turning to Hermione and she jumped back clearly startled. The others were equally surprised as they turned to look at her. 

"I —" Hermione tried to compose herself but Harry didn't feel like listening to her.

"Hermione, you knew how Chris was. How Chris always has been. How she always put us first and then thought about herself. Even when things got deadly, it was her, who put herself in front of the danger. You knew it. You know it, then how could you say those things to her?" Harry was trying extremely hard to keep his voice even and not to yell. 

"Harry, I was —" Hermione's voice shook but Harry wasn't done yet.

"When all of this started you knew how we all were feeling, weren't you? You knew that even I wanted to go alone to find the Horcruxes but it was you and Chris, who stopped me. It was Chris, Hermione. She told me that I wouldn't survive without you. She understood you. She understood me, she understood us and why we were so worried about her. That's why she apologized, repeatedly. Does all of this mean nothing to you?"

"Of course, it's not . . .  - Harry, you know it wasn't like that. I know how Chris is but you know, you are like a brother to me and she broke your heart, not once but —" Hermione's eyes filled with tears and she looked close to shrieking. 

"And do you know how many times she was broken, Hermione? How many times did she suffer alone?" Harry's voice was low, he was having a hard time keep going but he kept talking because Hermione needed to know. "Do you know how many times had she thought there was no one with her? No one that she could trust, no one she could love? You didn't see her the night Dumbledore died, Hermione. She was betrayed, she was broken, she lost her control and she decided not to feel anymore. She left everything because of us. Because she loved us. She cared about us. She still does, that's why she is back. And I don't care what anyone else thinks about her but I will not listen to any of this again. None of you will talk to her like that. None of you has the right to blame her decision when she took that decision to save all of us. To protect all of us."

Hermione was sobbing by the time Harry finished, and he felt bad for making his best friend cry, especially when Hermione said that he was like a brother to her. But he wouldn't let anyone disrespect Chris again.

Hermione looked at Ron, then Ginny, Luna, and Colin, all of them looked down clearly upset and shocked at Harry's outburst. Without saying a word, Hermione ran upstairs pushing past Harry, and running into the girls' room, she slammed the door hard leaving a ringing silence. As the silence stretched Harry could hear Hermione sobbing. In any other situation, he would have gone to console Hermione or apologized to her but right now, he needed to find Chris. Luckily, Ginny broke the tense stillness around them. 

"I never thought it would be Hermione, who would make Chris set off like this." Ginny rubbed her eyes looking frustrated. 

"I don't think anyone thought that," Ron replied and nervously glanced at Harry. "So do we inform Sirius and Aurelia because I don't think Chris is here? What do you think, Harry?"

"I don't think Chris left Grimauld Place," Harry said firmly.

Ron exchanged a worried glance with Colin and Ginny and was going to say something when Luna piped up.

"I think so too, Harry. Maybe she just turned herself, so we can't see her."

"Turned herself, what do you mean?" Ron asked surprised and Ginny and Colin sharply looked at Luna.

"It's nothing," Ginny jumped in nervously. "Maybe Luna is talking about Chris turning herself invisible with an invisibility cloak or something."

"Ginny, if they know it will help us find Chris," Luna told Ginny calmly.

"How would that help?" Ginny turned to her looking a bit angry. 

"Ginny, Harry is a parselmouth," Luna said and Ginny's eyes widened in realization.

"You understand what's happening here, Harry?" Ron looked from his sister to Harry with a very confused look.

"No," Harry shook his head then turned to Luna. "Luna, please tell me if there is a way to find Chris quickly."

Luna nodded and looked at Colin and Ginny expectantly, and Harry and Ron stared at the three of them. Finally, Colin sighed and looked at Ginny.

"Ginny, Luna is right. I think Harry can help" Colin turned to Harry. "You can sense snakes, right Harry?" Harry nodded slowly feeling very confused and Colin continued. "Call for Chris in Parseltongue and try to sense where she is?"

"Chris speak parseltounge?" Harry's eyes widened in surprise wondering when did she learn that and why she never told him about it, but most importantly how will he sense her even if she knows the language? However, Ron had a different understanding of Colin's words.

"Chris is a snake?" Ron almost shouted.

"What? Ron, what are you . . ." Harry was about to call Ron silly but then it suddenly made sense and he trailed off seeing Colin and Ginny's faces. "How . . .? What . . .? I don't . . ."

"Harry, it will be better if Chris answers all of your questions. We already broke the promise of not telling anyone unless we all agree to it," Colin looked very worried and tense as if breaking the promise has physically hurt him. "But desperate times need desperate measures."

"Harry, quickly look around, We need to be sure if Chris is still really here or left?" Ginny said dragging Ron away with her as he tried to ask questions. "I want to know first."

"But —" Harry began but Colin spoke first.

"Harry, Hermione wouldn't have gotten under Chris's skin if she wasn't feeling so guilty in the first place and I think you are the best person to remind her that it wasn't her fault," Colin spoke quietly and then smiled slightly. "She told me about the message you sent her through your Patronus, she said it was the thing that made her get up again after she thought me, Luna, and Ginny were dead."

Harry blinked as Colin's words sank in. The thought of his message really helping Chris filled his heart with warmth. He didn't feel like wasting any more time thinking or asking any more questions about the situation. He let his eyes close and spoke in parseltongue. 

"Chris . . ."

There was no reply as Harry stood on the stairs eyes closed but then he felt goosebumps and a presence in the back of his mind. He started climbing the stairs before whispering to Colin,

"I think you were right, Colin."

Colin nodded but didn't follow Harry, he and Luna went downstairs to inform Ginny and Ron.

Harry didn't stop until he was standing in front of the black family library. They checked the library thoroughly a few minutes ago but maybe not thoroughly enough to find a snake. Or maybe Ginny, Colin, and Luna did look for the snake but Chris was just very good at hiding. Imagining Chris as a snake gave Harry goosebumps all over again. As he opened the library door, the hair on his neck stood up, something similar he had experienced when he entered the chamber of secrets all those years ago. Harry still remembered the day so vividly. It was the first time, he saw Chris fighting and giving everything she had to help Ginny and him. Remembering her fearless look that day, brought a smile to Harry's lips as he continued looking around the library. Harry also wondered why hadn't he felt her snake presence before.

"Chris . . ." He repeated in parseltongue and this time he almost got a response back. It wasn't a word or anything but Harry knew that Chris realized he was calling her in parseltongue. 

Harry followed his instincts and reached the far end of the library shelves and peered through the old big heavy books on the shelves. He examined the entire shelf but found nothing. But Harry decided to trust his senses and reached around the bookshelf in every corner and after a moment or two his hand finally touched something cold above the bookshelf. He carefully lifted the thing in his hands and brought it down. A greenish dark snake stayed limp in his hands without moving, and Harry felt his stomach turn in fear.

"Chris, you are ok, right? Please be ok," Harry whispered in parseltongue or not, he had no idea. He carefully set the snake on the ground and kneeled before it. "Chris, please talk to me. Please."

Harry's heart raced miles in a second as the snake stayed limp and he started to panic, but then the snake transformed. Chris stood in front of still kneeling Harry. He looked up to find her eyes red and tearful but her face stoic.

"They told you, didn't they? Chris muttered very quietly but Harry heard her.

He stood up immediately and wrapping Chris in a hug he whispered,

"They had to . . . when we couldn't find you for so long . . . Do you know how worried we all were? We thought you —"

"Abandoned you all and ran away again because I couldn't handle emotions?" Chris said chuckling bitterly.

"Chris?" Harry pulled back to look at her. "Chris, please listen to me. I have told you before and I'm saying it again and I will keep saying it until you understand. It wasn't your fault. You didn't abandon us. You didn't run away. You decided to do what you thought would be the best."

"But wasn't it a wrong decision?" Chris's voice broke and she sounded so small suddenly that Harry felt his heart twisting painfully, he couldn't breathe. He had no idea Chris was feeling this bad and guilty about everything. He knew she was acting different but this was something else. 

"Chris, look at me," Harry spoke holding Chris's face with both of his hands so she would look at him. After Chris met his gaze, he continued, "Do you regret going to Titian? Didn't you gain any valuable information there? Didn't you find anything to help you stop Malgino? Answer me, please."

After hesitating for a moment Chris nodded.

"I did but you all —" Chris began but Harry spoke again.

"We did what we had to, Chris. If I had followed you around then we wouldn't have so many Horcruxes and if you had come with me then maybe you never would have the vampires and the information you have now. You did what you had to in order to protect us," Harry's voice was barely above a whisper. "I know why you did it. You wanted to protect us. Protect Ginny, Colin, and Luna. Protect me. Remember the picture you left me? It was what kept me going, Chris. It was the thought of you that helped me make the right choices."

"But Hermione . . ." Chris's voice broke and fresh tears welled up in her dark blue eyes.

Seeing her like this, Harry felt as if someone was squeezing his heart with metal bars. Those stormy blue eyes, which usually carried so much power and warmth around, were looking so lost, broken, and painful. It was like the day Dumbledore died, the way she sat beside Dumbledore's body, the way she started talking about Dumbledore, and the way Harry had to reassure her that everything will be ok.

Harry realized his eyes were getting wet as well, so he blinked, and looking back at Chris, he gently wiped the tears falling down her cheeks with his thumb.

"Chris, listen to me very carefully, Hermione is not the one, who knows what are we responsible for, what are we going through, and what we went through to get here. Yes, she was with me from the beginning but she doesn't know what it's like to be the chosen one but do you know who does? You. The protector of Hogwarts knows what's like to be the chosen one. We know the amount of responsibility that was thrust upon us from an early age. We know what's it like to lose a mentor and yet keep following the path he suggested to us, the path he showed us. We know that we are the ones who have to finish all of this."

"But I didn't need to do this alone. Dumbledore warned us . . ." Chris whispered, there was still a conflict in her eyes. "You didn't need to do this alone. We could have —"

"But we weren't alone, Chris," Harry tucked Chris's dark hair strands behind her ears and smiled softly. "You were always with me. And you also had people around you, didn't you?"

Chris's eyes soften and a smile broke through her tears. She almost jumped in Harry's arms and buried her face in his chest. Harry quickly wrapped his arms around her, holding her tightly against him.

"You were there with me too, Harry. You were always with me." Harry heard her whisper against his neck. Harry couldn't help but shiver because of both her confession and the closeness between them. 

Maybe Chris felt it too because slowly she leaned back a little and looked at Harry. There were still tears in her eyes a little bit but she didn't look lost anymore. There was this intense look in her eyes mixed with that warm look of hers, which melted Harry's heart every time.

Chris leaned forward slowly glancing at his lips and as if he had no control over it, Harry did the same. He was always drawn to her no matter what. Chris closed her eyes as their lips almost touched, Harry held his breath and — 

"Harry! Chris! Come down quick. It's Dean!"

[To be continued. . .]