20 Chapter 20: The Last Rays Of Sunshine

Ever since the incident in the library, I felt strange. I lay awake at night counting all the flowers on that ugly tacky bedspread and only half-heartedly listening to Madame Orangerinne's lesson. Nicola's feelings hadn't seemed to change, on the contrary, they seemed to have grown. I was biting my nails somewhat absently when suddenly a dull thud caught my attention. Madame had dropped a large atlas on her table and was staring into the round. I swallowed slightly and hid my fingers under my long on cloth. She was about to raise her voice when the door opened and a servant, I recognised him by a golden feather on his lapel, scurried in.

The golden feather was still a symbol from the old days, once it had been the coat of arms of the cantonment. But now in times of attacks and enmities within the royal houses, it was forbidden to show coats of arms or any relics on walls, leaflets or on television. It was simply to prevent people from immediately starting a hunt against all members of the current royal family. However, it was very questionable because everyone in our country knew who was currently holding office as our king.

I had mentioned before that I did not understand these rules. I watched the messenger. He was visibly uncomfortable with the attention and out of breath, he strode quickly to Orangerinne and whispered something in her ear before handing over a letter made of parchment with a seal and a bow. He then bowed slightly and wished us, or rather the ladies, a good day. Not only we but also our teacher was puzzled. Madame opened the envelope and some wax crumbled onto her skirt. She read tensely and finally set down from the writing.

She leaned ladylike against her desk and folded the note closed. Then she smiled to the audience: "Ladies, the Prince awaits you all in the Royal Garden. There will be a small celebration due to the good weather, everything is already prepared," she lightly ran through her hair, "For that reason, I would say that classes are over for today." I heard murmuring and light giggling. In summary, the mood lightened. I was one of the last to rise. Even though I was now no longer sitting in the classroom listening to the boring sermons, I still didn't feel the need to party.

Some of the girls dashed to their rooms to change into lighter clothes. Today was a beautiful day and I could do with some vitamin D. My skin had become paler since my stay, I didn't get out in people much before either, but I was definitely out in the fresh air more than I was now.

It was afternoon and the sun was slightly behind the palace, the shadows of the trees made the atmosphere more pleasant and peaceful. There were round tables set up with blankets and ornate garden chairs. There were garlands and a buffet. An orchestra played quietly on a stand. I looked around for the prince, but Nicolas had not appeared. The royal couple and their servants were sitting a little away from the gift. It occurred to me that I had never seen them in private before. The queen laughed softly as her husband leaned towards her. Perhaps he was telling her a joke. Her demeanour is neither stiff nor put-upon; she seems genuinely happy.

I stood on the lawn with my arms folded, watching the two of them. I secretly wished to find such happiness one day too. Suddenly a small whistle sounded, and the next moment Prince Nicolas stepped onto a small platform. He cleared his throat and a servant fiddled lightly with his bow tie, inside was a nanomirkophone, a novelty in our country. I rolled my eyes slightly, of course, he had the latest thing on the market again.

After a minute he cleared his throat again and the musicians fell silent, all attention was on him. His smile seemed so fake, but only I seemed to notice, all the girls were hanging on his lips as he began his speech. "My dear ladies, thank you very much for accepting my invitation in such large numbers. Even though I would like to enjoy the last warm days with you, I have not done this without a reason..." While he was talking like that, I wondered if he liked being the centre of attention. He seemed very reserved, rather unapproachable than approachable. I quickly shook my head and concentrated on his speech again. "...In any case, I would like to give you another opportunity to get to know me better today, because decisions will soon be made again. In addition, you still have the chance today. The lady with whom I had the most interesting conversation is one round further and can look forward to a date with me. Accordingly, I hope you keep that in mind and I wish us all a good time."

He stepped down from his show post, a short crackle could be heard. The music resumed. No sooner had Nicolas mingled with the crowd than he was surrounded by my fellow contestants. Everyone wanted to take this chance, everyone except me. Or did I want it?

After all, I told him I wanted to stay. I bit my lower lip and took another sip of my drink. I strolled lightly across the green and headed for the buffet. There was plenty to choose from, something for everyone, including two water carafes with little cards. On one stand with mint on the other without. I had to grin slightly and held the card without mint in my hand. "That's nice, isn't it?", a friendly voice spoke next to me. I twitched slightly and turned around. It was the queen.

I was quite surprised that she was wearing a blouse and trousers. I would have thought she would conform to etiquette. Her hair was half-open and tied at the back. I nodded tentatively. She smiled warmly at me and continued: "You're Belle, aren't you? Nicolas told me a few things about you, including that you don't like mint," she pointed her finger at the card, "He made sure there was something for you separately, isn't that thoughtful of him."

I was speechless, she was talking to me as if I was on her stand. "I'm sorry I just approached you like that, but I really wanted to meet you and what better way than a non-coercive party," she laughed softly with her hand in front of her mouth. I was about to reply when I was interrupted and King Mehr called out: "Alice, dear are you coming back?" She turned quickly and affirmed that she would be right back.

She apologised to me: "Forgive me, but the king gets easily upset if he doesn't get his cake soon." She fetched a plate and a fork. "If you like, you are welcome to come to our table and chat with us for a while, I promise I won't pester you with questions either, although it is very difficult for me," she smiled warmly again, then left the buffet and headed for her table. I stood there slightly dazed and decided to accept her invitation. When had I ever had the opportunity to sit at a table with a queen and talk in private?

When I joined the group I was greeted and kicked in front of the king, I wanted to show him that I was not an oaf and that even though I was only a four I also knew what manners were. The king seemed to tolerate me, I could understand him, after all, I didn't see him as an official but as a normal father who looked after his son. "So tell me, how do you like it with us so far? I know it's sometimes like a golden cage, but believe me, it can also be very nice here.", Alice broke the silence.

I took a sip of my cake and answered her kindly: "It is very nice here, but I had to get used to a lot of things, but I think it is slowly becoming more normal."

"Yes, of course, I can imagine that it is unusual for a lady in your position to have servants, especially as you were on the other side not long ago.", King Mehr interjected. He didn't sound like he meant it as an insult, but it still offends me.

Yes, I had been a two-star, but I had no choice. They were the typical remarks of someone who didn't know what the world behind the walls was really like. The queen slapped her husband lightly on the chest with the back of her hand. Her gaze was widened and she seemed to be saying that he was insensitive. She was embarrassed: "Forgive my husband and me, we don't mean things meanly, it's just not easy for us to imagine what it must be like for you to grow up like this."

It hurt even more. I hated this pity, I wished for a change of subject. I bit my tongue, I couldn't allow myself to speak my mind, with Nicolas it was possible but here, never. I hated myself at that moment for being born with a sharp tongue. I quickly dismissed it: "It's okay." I poked at my piece of cake. I heard a sigh: "Change the subject.", the king cleared his throat, "My son has told us about you Lady Maybelle, you seem to have fascinated him. I am especially glad that he is attracted to at least one. I was really, I mean my wife and I were getting quite desperate."

He laughed briefly and ate another piece from his fork. "Well, it wasn't that dramatic, it sounds like we're forcing him to get married." Alice put her hand on mine, it was very soft and tender, and spoke well to me: "Don't worry Belle, it may not seem like it to you, but we are really happy that Nicolas likes you so much, that makes us happy." Their sudden closeness made my skin tingle slightly and I ignored the burgeoning guilt that I was about to take their son away from them.

I had to swallow to keep from bursting into tears in front of them too. I rose and excused myself briefly, saying I needed to powder my nose. Alice nodded in understanding: "Of course, darling, you go ahead."