16 Chapter 16: IT'S A DATE
Black's POV
It's already Sunday. We don't have work today but I'm going somewhere else. James asked me to go with him. Don't know where. He said it's a surprise, he's getting weird last night as if he's hiding something.
We arrived at a building, a hospital to be exact. The only difference is the patients are mentally sick. Not that they are crazy, but they are going through depression.
"What exactly is this place?" I asked
"Del Rio Psychologia Hospital." He answered
"Wait, Are you working today? You shouldn't ask me out then." I commented but he smiled
"I'd like to show you something" We went to a room, a conference room, there are a lot of people there, James said that they are interns. We will watch a live session of various cases about mental health.
"I want you to listen to my patients," James told me before going to another room.
"mkay!" I answered even it weirded me out. Is this can be considered a date?
The lights turned off and the screen started playing.
"Good afternoon! What's your name?" James asked. He's the only one we can see on the screen, the camera angle is adjusted, I think it's also a way of protecting their patient.
"I'm Mariz"
"Hi Mariz. Can you do me a favor?, look into my eyes and tell me what you feel right now" A minute of silence before we heard a fading sobbed like she's trying to stop herself from crying but it's no help, Without saying something, She just cried.
"It's okay! You can talk to me"
"I-i lost E-everything I-i have. I went to the right side b-but, b-but there's n-nothing l-left with me aside from those papers we called m-money! I'm alone! My p-parents died in a car crash! My baby brother burned himself alive. My b-boyfriend left me! I just want to die! I'm tired of my life! I can't do it anymore! Please! Help me! I wanna die!" James let her cry her heart out and wait till she finished crying.
"You know Mariz, I have a close friend who is similar to what you're going through. She also lost everything. But you know, even though she was struggling, she tried to fight. She tried to live normally. So now, she's happy again. Do you want to be happy again? " James asked. His voice is really soft that can calm the crying person.
"h-how?" She asked
"Don't make yourself feel alone. You still have friends. You can count on them. Always imagine that there are people around you who are willing to hold your hand and help you. Then get rid of the negative thoughts in your mind by making happy memories. And with that, every time you think about those tragedies in your life. You will realize, It's all in the past. You already moved forward. "
"I-it's not that easy" She commented
"Nothing is easy. That's why we have to bear in our mind that even if it's not easy, even if it's hard to do, the end will come where you can achieve a happy ending"
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Another session started, It's a woman again.
"Hi. What's your name?" James asked
"Janna" She simply answered
"So what do you feel right now?"
"I feel shit! My father forced me to go to some psycholoshit! He fucking thinks that I'm crazy because I pranked her new bitch" She exclaimed with full of annoyance.
"Your attitude is a Defense mechanism to the fragile you" James stated
"I'm not fragile." She straightly answered. She sounded so pissed and I think this conversation will not go smoothly.
"Because that's what you believed"
"News Flash, Mr. All-Knowing, You don't know me!" She answered which has a point I just don't like how she delivered it because it is rude.
"I don't but I see it in your eyes!" James said calmly. We didn't hear a word from the woman so James continued talking.
"You missed your real mom, You still feel alone that makes you think that you're strong enough and it triggers you to hate those people who made you feel like this. I know it's a hard part for a teenager but, listen, things that hurt you are all in your mind because that's what you believed but in reality, those people you keep pushing away are the people who truly care for you. You should show who you truly are coz pretending strong doesn't make any good." James said at length. My chest felt tight. I see myself as a teenager. We have the same situation. My mom also left me when I was 14, 7 years had passed. I never hear a word from her. She didn't say goodbye nor contact me.
I'm in deep thought when I saw James walking towards me.
"Black, are you okay?" He asked as soon as he approached me.
"Why?" I asked him.
"What, why?" he asked back
"Why did you brought me here?"
"I care for you that's why I want to help you!" He was obviously concerned, I saw it in his eyes so I avoided his gaze.
Aside from my Dad and Mich, He is the first person who told me that he cared for me. I hate it coz I realized that he is slowly invading my heart.
"Stop caring!" I commented
"How? How can I stop caring to someone whom I like?" I was surprised by what he said but I immediately changed my expression.
"Don't say something unnecessary. I don't want to get left behind in the end!" I told him seriously and stood up to leave the room but he stopped me by holding my hand.
"Wait, Black! I meant it! I won't leave you!" he said as if it's the only thing he's sure of. I scoffed and look him straight in the eyes.
"That's the exact words that my mom said before she left me. Hope you really meant it" I said and removed his grip on my hand.
I started walking again when he spoke again.
"You're indeed an amazing and a strong woman" I didn't look at him but I smiled
"I know" I replied
"But keep in mind that not everyone's gonna be able to see that side of you and that's okay." The smile disappeared from my face as I left the hospital. Does he mean my personality? Am I hiding who I really am? Am I a shadow of myself? That Psychologist really driving me crazy.
I decided to stop by the restaurant nearby. After a lot of thinking, I texted James
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To: James Mendez 10:58 am
Lunch. Meet me at the restaurant in front of the hospital.
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I know that there's something I left unsaid. I want to take chances, I want to see what's the difference it will make. I want to see how will it go.
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11:30 when James arrived.
"I'm sorry you waited and I'm also sorry if I said something that might upset you!" He said as soon as he sat down.
"Nah! don't bother. I ordered food."
A moment of silence occupied the table until our food arrives, while we're eating, I decided to speak up.
"You just confessed a while ago. So you like me, huh?" he smiled upon hearing it.
"Still straightforward," He said as he tried to suppress his smile
"I told you before that I don't do relationships, didn't I?" I asked
"Yeah! I remember that. But I will still try to court you!" he also answered directly while looking into my eyes.
"Don't! you cannot change my mind but I offer you something. How about let's just stay this way, We're not together but no one else will be allowed to date you except me." A big smile form on his face when I said that.
"Does that mean you like me too?" He happily asked that made me smile.
"The feeling is mutual" I plainly said then continue eating.
"But we're n,not exclusively dating? It's confusing but it's like a boyfriend-girlfriend thing. It's fine, we will do it your way" He agreed. Wow! He's good at compromising
"In some way, you still have your freedom. You're not my prisoner, Just stay loyal and be honest. That's all I ask"
"Of course! With or without a label, when I decided to confess to you, I'm sure that you're the only person I want to be with.
I'm happy with his reaction to everything I say. I found it fascinating, so this is what we called sincere feelings?
I know I'm risking something the time I let him enter my life, but I hope he will be worth the risk.
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