1 chapter. I realized that this scream belongs to me. Final

He always admired her with her beauty, her impregnable warmth in deep green eyes, her scattering of freckles on her round ruddy face, her curly black curls with a green tint, her gentle slightly trembling voice... Kirishima himself did not notice how he managed to fall in love with his classmate. Just ... took and fell in love. Eijiro did not remember at all when these senses began to obscure his sanity, they began to suck all thoughts into the abyss of sweet dreams, they began... to simply exist. He never strove for love, and she herself found him. The fucking arrow of the cupid - just a huge, maybe even a whole nuclear weapon - crashed right into the heart of an unsuspecting guy with the speed of a comet and knocked him to the spot.

Everything would be easier if this girl was not his classmate and childhood friend of his best friend - Bakugo Katsuki, who could not stand her presence with all his existence. And, actually, why, he never told. He only easily sent in three cheerful letters and showed the middle finger until he was left behind. One could even notice how, at the mention of his girlfriend, his hand shook displeasedly, ready at any moment to show an uncultured gesture.

That was weird. And at times it worsened the situation with Kirishima's unexpected love, because for some reason he could not go against his best friend. Either he was afraid to piss him off again, which is unlikely, or ... a certain barrier. And this invisible barrier from all sides surrounded the fragile girl, not allowing anyone to go beyond it. It seemed that if you try to touch it even with your fingertips, then there will be a bare bone behind your hand, and a handful of smoldering ashes will already lie on the ground.

Or maybe Eijiro had such a rich imagination and he "covered" his embarrassment and unwillingness to annoy the poor girl with a "barrier". Seriously, he didn't even have to come close enough to her to feel with all possible senses such embarrassing soul and heart. It was enough just to stand close to her. And "close" for a guy was equivalent to several people, which shared them.And meanwhile, feelings all grew and grew somewhere deep in the chest, gradually turning into a huge ball of secret desires and thoughts. And the main desire was to talk with the girl and call her at least once by name aloud, and not just in the hidden corners of consciousness. But something prevented this, namely, a certain isolation of the girl. Sometimes it even seemed that she was jumping from every rustle, and if someone started talking to her - especially Bakugo - then she began to actively blush and mumble something.

It's even scary to approach her, because to frighten her was not in the plans of Kirishima. He himself would rather be thrown out the window than he would. But sometimes I really wanted to talk to her...

But one day everything went according to a slightly different scenario, which even pleasantly surprised the guy. Well, at first hell was embarrassing, and then pleasantly surprised.

It was the middle of the third year of high school and graduates should already have chosen what specialty they should go next. Without a doubt, everyone immediately chose the profession of a hero, even if their quirks clearly did not fit the category of "heroic" or even remotely "useful". Although, obviously, many secretly began to think about other professions, they simply did not disgrace themselves in front of classmates. We were informed that in a few days we would be given out forms for admission to other academies after graduating from high school. After completing classes, Bakugo maliciously sent Kirishima into the anus and went forward, not wanting to waste his time waiting. The guy got used to it, so he was going to slowly, not even noticing that practically no one was left in the class.

Except that... Yes, by the will of fate, it is Izuku Midoria, the object of the guy's sighing. She, obviously fighting for a long time with her whole being for a second, slightly touched Eijiro's shoulder, which caused a herd of goose bumps, an unexpected "Oh God!" Burst from his throat, and then he almost jumped in place. Then he turned to the frightened Midoria, who held her hands in front of him in an apologetic gesture. Herd of goosebumps once again defiled through his body, and his face was slightly crimson. After all - O Lord of all Egypt - Izuku herself came up to him and touched her shoulder. What is today's date? He is obliged to indicate this date in the calendar and celebrate every year.

"Sorry, Kirishima ..." - she squeezed her hands into small fists and pressed her ribs, showing with all her appearance that she was feeling very uncomfortable and embarrassed. Her cheeks also flushed, - "just ... yesterday in the classroom you forgot your English notebook, here I am ... wait a second!"

Midoria abruptly turned to her backpack and almost dived there headlong. After a few seconds, she was already holding out the red notebook with slightly shaking hands. Kirishima was already ready to scream to the whole world that this is the best day in his damn life. But he tried to keep the remnants of cold-bloodedness, so with all the grains of calm that only remained in him, he took this - divine - notebook and put it in his bag. It took a few seconds before the guy realized that he should have thanked Izuku for her attentiveness and honesty.

"Thank you, Midoria," - he almost gave himself in the face for nearly calling her by name. Fortunately, oxygen entered the brain on time, and it did not make the most terrible mistake of a lifetime. He even breathed a sigh of relief, which caused some interest in the girl - "ah ... no, I'm sorry, it's nothing, I ... Do you mind taking a little walk with me? Tomorrow is a day off..."

All hope was embedded in the last sentence, which was hidden in the depths of Eijiro's heart all the time while he concealed his love feelings. Midoria patted her eyes in surprise, and after a few seconds of active awareness, she flushed with all shades of red forest.

"Y-yes ... I think ... don't mind."

Fireworks somewhere inside exploded with a loud pop, heart filled with indescribable joy, and a smile that blossomed on his face showed the guy's feelings in full. Perhaps he even looked too joyful than it should have been. Nevertheless, Midoria answered him with an embarrassed smile and then said goodbye to Eijiro, running away from the classroom.

***

Kirishima waited for Izuku almost all day near her house. He did not bother to ask her number, set an exact date for a date, or even a meeting place, so he arrived at her house around noon. Neither she, nor even her relatives came out. At least a cat would go out to meet a poor, sad, hoping for something, guy. Unless, of course, Izuku had animals.

A certain consolation in this scanty situation was the thought that perhaps Izuku had some unforeseen circumstances, and due to the lack of a room, she could not warn him. Nevertheless, Kirishima was waiting, clutching pink tulips in his palms more tightly.

And he waited, simultaneously kicking a long-suffering stone and playing improvised football with himself.

Then he waited even more, watching funny videos about playing cats on the Internet. He also wants a cat for himself. Preferably white.

And then he waited even more, exchanging glances with a suspicious pillar, which somehow didn't look very kindly at a bouquet of tulips. Kirishima has already become seriously worried about his psychological health. Games peepers with suspicious poles - not good, even if they are really very run up. Fortunately, Eijiro was still smart enough not to quarrel with this fucking pillar and not lose to him in a dictionary insult. Well, perhaps he would have quarreled with him if he had not met Bakugo.

Then poor Eijiro's life flashed before his eyes, as soon as he noticed the appraising gaze of red predatory eyes. How did he just not notice his approach? Clearly, the pillar was to blame for everything - he distracted the guy's attention to himself, giving his friend a chance to sneak up unnoticed!

It's necessary to be treated already ...

"Are you waiting for Deku, shit-haired?" - a rather ordinary greeting in the style of Bakugo, not portending anything good. Kirishima is already used to it.

"No ... that is, yes ... And how did you know?" - the guy made every possible effort to hide behind a damn bouquet of bloody tulips. This is even despite the fact that a second ago he was very even in sight.

"Do you think that I am such an idiot that I won't notice that you've stood under the windows of a neighbor's house with a bouquet in your hands like six fucking hours? I already began to wonder how much is enough for you."

Katsuki laughed somehow unkindly and grinned rather sarcastically. Eijiro pouted offendedly, triumphantly lowering his hands with a bouquet down.

"Am I so idiot?" He asked with some irony.

"Full. Sheer. How did you even manage to get down to caring for Deku?" - Bakugo discontentedly massaged the bridge of his nose, trying to put all his thoughts together.

"Well ... I like her."

"Deku?" - almost falling into hysteria, asked Bakugo in raised tones. He laughed again, - "I'm afraid you won't like her when you get to know her better, you moron."

But before Kirishima had time to ask about the meaning of these words, Katsuki, rather rudely waving his middle finger, began to move away from him towards his house. Just said some strange phrase and left ?! Kirishima was upset, lost, and confused. Just in case, leaving tulips near Izuku's apartment, Kirishima trudged home. Of course, he did not forget to send a pillar. Without this action, probably the day was completely and irrevocably lost. Now, the guy was feeling a little better.Little?He was damn sorry. The impression was that he just for fun bought these damn tulips and waited all day in the scorching sun. Nothing to do! Kirishima did not blame Izuku at all, no. He understood that for no reason she would never have done so. So, she had her own reasons for that ... Perhaps, all the same, those very unforeseen circumstances. Just ... maybe Bakugo was really right and Kirishima was a real idiot in love, completely blinded and not seeing anything.

And also, this is his plain phrase, knocking out all the air from the lungs from one memory only: "I'm afraid you will stop liking it when you get to know her better, moron"...

Only later Kirishima will fully understand this phrase.

The next day - part-time school day - Izuku apologized to Kirishima for the fact that she could not walk with him as promised. He forgave her at first glance at this sad and apologetic face, while Bakugo, passing by, threw something very stinging in their direction. Something like "again mercy, half-fools. Enrage!" Eijiro did not even listen to her excuses, saying directly and with a smile that he was not at all offended and that he was ready to walk with her at anytime.

Only if they exchange numbers. Which they embarrassedly did after school. Kirishima was overjoyed, why he was ready to squeeze the girl in his immediate arms, but he decided to completely abandon this plan. And Izuku ... well, she was embarrassed. Then she again somewhere quickly ran away, but the guy decided not to focus on this. Still, who will understand these girls?Kirishima was in high spirits the next day, and the next after the next, and then it suddenly crumbled to smithereens, like a porcelain vase from a careless hand movement. And it happened then ... when a very interesting and rather terrible rumor about Midoria passed through the class, which Kirishima did not believe to the last. And the meaning of this rumor was simple: Midoria Izuku uses mifedrone *. No one knows who started this rumor. He simply spread with the speed of the virus throughout the class, and soon, the ridicule in her direction became more sophisticated, brutal than it was before due to the lack of her quirk. Now no one missed the opportunity to skip the extra comment in the direction of her "dangerous preference", which is why the girl immediately went deep into her thoughts, hiding her face behind a short square. It helped ... not very good.

Miphedrone* is a dangerous narcotic substance in the form of a powder, which is very dangerous in large doses.

If the bullying over Izuku occurred somewhere in Eijiro's field of vision, he immediately threw everything away and hurried to his beloved to help: he maliciously sent offenders to all the terrible places of the planet, which was pretty ... not in his style. He just wanted to protect the almost crying Izuku, which simply pursed her lips in a silent scream. Why is she silent and not defending herself? She ... does she really love mifedrone? Eijiro did not understand this and did not even want to delve into it. These are all rumors! This is all untrue!

The guy did not even try to talk with Midoria on this topic. He firmly believed that such a beautiful girl in her right mind would not use such dangerous drugs, and generally use something. Envy and envious people spelled it out. Snakes. Critters. Anyone. This all cannot be true. Only ... not that.Bakugo then - for the first time ever in the memory of Eijiro - somehow encouragingly took his shoulder in an unknown gesture. The eye was not visible, because Katsuki was passing by, but through this touch you can understand that he ... sympathizes.

Is that really true? Did Bakugo really know about this? Doesn't that mean ... No. If Bakugo had spread this rumor, he would have done it a long time ago. In addition, Bakugo is not one of those talkative chickens that spread sensitive information left to right.

Midoria left the very first of the class on that ill-fated day. And Kirishima simply could not go after her. He just threw all his things in the classroom, as soon as the curls disappeared behind the closed classroom door. Under loud curses in his direction from Bakugo, he rushed headlong after the beloved. He could catch her only on a certain lonely street outside their school, pretty roughly grabbing the girl by the elbow. Izuku immediately turned around and looked into the scarlet eyes opposite. The tears in the eye sockets streamed down their cheeks.

"Izuku?"

Eijiro simply could not help but name her differently at that moment. She was completely not opposed.

"I'm sorry ... Kirishima, I ... didn't come that day because ... I was under the next dose and didn't want you to see me like that ..." - she bit her lip to the blood, - "forgive me, I ... I really don't know ... You ... because disappointed in me? .."

"I love you, Izuku."

Emerald eyes widened sharply, and dry lips fell to the bloody ones. The stupefying metallic taste filled completely all of Eijiro's thoughts, and he frantically kissed his lips so desired that they were even softer as he imagined them. Izuku trembled and choked with hysterical sobs, but at the same time she found the strength to respond to the kiss, which was more necessary than all the damn words in the whole damn universe. It was painful. It hurt terribly. But these indescribable sensations, spreading all over the body along with blood, completely interrupted this pain, gradually and completely eclipsing it. Izuku acquired the guy's neck with trembling hands, while he held his hands on her neck and stroked wet cheeks with his thumbs.

Both gave their feelings, raging inside for a long time, feelings in a long and metallic kiss, not at all embarrassed. The breath of both was completely lost, and stingy male tears appeared in Eijiro's eyes too. Still, through a kiss, he felt all the inner pain of his beloved. So, without words, but only through a kiss. And with all his heart he wanted to take at least part of this pain.

And Midoria ... she felt all the tenderness and love hidden in the depths of such a tender heart. She herself felt these feelings, but ... from this it was even more disgusting at heart from herself and her actions. She betrayed the feelings of such a gentle guy with her recklessness.

She is terrible.

She is not worthy to be with him.

The kiss was torn with a slight smack. Emerald muddy eyes met the same scarlet that they looked with the most tremulous tenderness that they were capable of. Wet foreheads met in a silent conversation, and the beaten breath of both made it clear that they could not talk for a long time.Actually, this is no reason now.

After a few seconds, Izuku herself reaches for another portion of her much-needed pleasure. Like a drug addict reaching for his newfound favorite drug. And Eijiro was not at all opposed. He tenderly falls back to Izuku's lips, covers his eyes and involuntarily presses her back against the cold wall. Perhaps he did not even notice this, but perhaps the girl herself pulled him there. None of them emphasized this nuance. All thoughts and feelings were concentrated on lips and tremulous kisses. Everything else was truly worthless. . .

Kirishima thought everything was fine now. That now they will deal with all the problems together. What ... now they will live happily, giving each other as many happy moments as they both deserve. But ... after some marathon of such sweet kisses, she asked to leave her for a while alone. Kirishima respected personal space, so calmly let her go.If he knew that he could save her without letting go anywhere, he would never let go...

Some feeling pulled him toward the school. Their high school. Perhaps a hunch that his things were about to be set on fire, or perhaps he was just drawn.

If he came a little earlier, he could still save her ...

A look involuntarily falls up on the so familiar and beloved shadow on the roof of the building. Eijiro does not even have time to open his mouth, as the figure spreads its arms and flies into free flight, like a bird to heaven. All in slow motion. Here, Eijiro runs, trying to catch the girl in flight. Here, Izuku meets with the long-awaited asphalt, smiling blissfully with his last smile. Here, a loud cry is heard.

Eijiro did not immediately realize that he belonged to him.

He screams very loudly, furiously, putting all his inner pain into this scream. He falls to his knees, then presses the beloved's dead body to his chest and rests in her still warm neck. He is still screaming. Only one single phrase is spinning in my thoughts: "I could not save".

And Izuku looked peaceful, melting with a mortal body in his hands.

What a pity that she never said to Eijiro those cherished words that had been hidden in her heart for three years. What a pity that she did not tell the story of drowning out her pain from non-reciprocity and ridicule with the help of mifedrone. What a pity ... that their first kiss was the last.

Indeed, now Izuku Midoria is dead.