I was being shaken. My eyes shot open. I sat up and looked around. I was about to panic. Where was I? I turned to see an older woman looking at me with concern. Mrs. Park. I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. I checked my phone, what time is it? 7:00 am. I set my phone down and rubbed my eyes. "What time does school start, Mrs. Park?"
She opened the blinds and the windows. I swung my legs over the edge of the bed and stretched. "School starts at 8 am love, I set your uniform on the desk. I hope it fits.. You weren't here for the fitting."
I went to the desk and separated the uniform. It was a white button down, a black pleated skirt, and a black tie. Mrs. Park walked out of the room and came back with a shoe box. She handed it to me with a smile. I took it and opened it. They were converse high. on top were black knee-high socks. I smiled, a fake smile, and bowed.
I showered. The cuts were becoming scars. And I didn't feel like making any new ones. I wet my hair. I couldn't wash it since it was in box braids. I had gotten them done before leaving. I didn't know why. Now I do. The shower was warm, but Mr. Park had to be at a meeting this morning and was dropping me off at my school. I stepped out of the shower and wrapped in a towel. I brushed my teeth and did my make up, leaving my hair in a simple bun. My uniform was waiting to be put on. I didn't know how it would fit me. It was made for skinny girls. I didn't have that type of body. I had the body of a colored girl. I put the shirt on and buttoned it up. It fit. I pulled the skirt on. It fit. I sighed in relief. I sat on the toilet seat and slid the socks on. They fit. I looked at the tie. I didn't know how to put it on. I don't wear ties. I shoved it in my shoe and headed out of the bathroom. My bag was sitting on the Kitchen table. It was packed. I smiled. Almost real. Mr.Park came out of the back of the house. I assume it was their bedroom.
"Ready to go, Tory-ah?" He said picking up his briefcase. His use of honorifics made me cock my head. I knew of honorifics but never been called with such. I nodded throwing my head over my shoulder. I slid my shoes on and tucked my tie in the pocket of my bag.
I followed him to the car. He opened the door for me and I thanked him. He smiled and went to his side of the car. I buckled my seat belt and leaned back. The car smelled like the incense from inside the house. I closed my eyes and sighed. "Your moms called this morning." Mr. Park said as he pulled out of the driveway. "They tried to reach you on your phone but you were still asleep. They wanted me to tell you to have a good day."
I nodded and looked at my phone, no notifications. "Thank you,"
The ride was silent after that. I looked out the window. The radio was on some talk show that was in Korean. I didn't understand it. I just listened. It was soothing. I would have fallen asleep if we hadn't of gotten to the school. Mr. Park pulled up to the building. There were kids everywhere. I felt out of place. I didn't want to be here. My hands started shaking. I needed to cut. I needed to go home. I needed not to be here. Mr. Park must have noticed my nervousness because he took my hand in his. He got out of the car and came around to my side. He opened the door and unbuckled my belt. He turned me so I was facing him. He crouched down to be my level, taking his hands in mine.
"Deep breaths okay? You're going to be fine. Your moms showed us videos of you dancing. You're an incredible dancer Victorya, don't let anyone tell you, or make you think otherwise." He reached into my bag and grabbed my tie. He wrapped it around my neck and tied it. I focused on his forehead. He pulled me out of the car and handed me my bag. I slung it over my shoulder. Mr. Park kissed my forehead and told me to go to the office. I said goodbye and waited for him to pull away. I plugged in my headphones and turned up my music. I walked to the school with my head down to avoid any eye contact with people. I was sticking out like a sore thumb and I wanted to slip into nothing. I wanted to disappear.
I reached the building and to my luck, the office was on my left. I walked through the glass doors. There was a lady at the front desk. She looked up at me and smiled.
"Good morning! You must be our new student?" she was loud, white, and too happy for me.
" Yeah, I am," I said under my breath.
She must have caught my vibe because she handed me my schedule and told me classes started in 20 minutes.
Jungkook sat on the floor and looked Jimin in the eyes. He was determined to break him. They had been at this for hours. A staring contest.
"Are you guys almost done?" Namjoon asked wiping his forehead with a towel.
"Not until he breaks!" they both yelled in unison. Hoseok rolled his eye at them and approached them on the floor. He squatted down and clapped his hands in front of their faces. They both blinked.
"What the hell Hyung!" Jungkook shouted.
"I won!" Jimin said throwing his hands up in victory.
"No you didn't Jimin," Jungkook said standing.
"Yes I did, you blinked," Jimin said matter-of-factly.
"You both won, we have to be at the school in 20 minutes. Get ready and stop acting like five-year-olds." Namjoon said throwing on a clean shirt.