13 That's Hot

I couldn't stop sighing over and over and eventually, Miguel, who was sitting on my bed finally said,

"Could you please stop making that stupid noise, you're annoying me..."

"You're being so mean! And... I can't help it, y'know... because I'm disappointed... I was really hoping she'd gotten better. I was excited to talk to her." I stated, staring down.

"Why would you think that?" Miguel inquired.

"I don't know... maybe wishful thinking, or just stupidity. I just... thought she actually cared about me and deep inside, SUPER deep inside, I wish she and my dad could be together again, but... I give up! it's impossible!" He stayed quiet for some time then he asked,

"Does that kind of thing happen often?" I raised my eyebrows and tilted my head to display my lack of understanding of whatever the heck he was referring to. "Do the men in your mom's house, often come on to you?" I flailed, worried about how he might be feeling.

"About that! Well, sometimes but it's usually because of a misunderstanding and can be settled easily. During my depressed years, it didn't happen at all." I replied. He sighed.

"Don't try to make the situation seem better than it is. You shouldn't be visiting here if the men in your mother's house don't have the decency to respect her daughter." Miguel cracked his knuckles and I rubbed his shoulders to calm him. "It bothers me that you've been here alone when your mom is so... lax with her guests." He admitted.

"But nothing extreme happened... so please don't let that stress you." Miguel shrugged off my hands so I turned from him and sulked.

"Also... I know how you feel... I mean with the admitting defeat thing. It's awful but I've been there." I sat down next to him,

"Do you want to talk about it?" He hummed to himself and then replied,

"Not really... Just know that it's not your fault. You can't control anyone's actions but your own... and if you're struggling still, I'm here for support." I placed my hand on top of his,

"Thank you," I whispered, looking down at my feet to keep some of the shyness away. A few quiet seconds passed and then Miguel intertwined our fingers before saying,

"Sometimes you run and scream when I touch you... is it because you hate it? At first, I thought you were just shy around me... but you reacted similarly to that guy earlier. I just want to be sure." That's when I realized what was upsetting him the most at this moment. 

"No of course not! When you touch me... it's um... like a powerful electrical shock and I lose control of my motor functions, so my legs just move on their own. My feelings are so intense that I feel the need to escape and take a minute to calm down," I explained excitedly while flailing my arms. Miguel sighed again.

"Is that a good thing?" He mumbled, unassuredly, to himself.

"I enjoy it. I feel happy when you touch me! I've been isolated for so long, that I really feel uncomfortable when it's anyone else, but with you it's different. I would never want it to end if I could stand the cold and my racing heart better." My explanation made him laugh and then he leaned in to kiss me.

"That's a relief... I wouldn't want to be a source of discomfort for you... by being selfish and only doing what I want." I smiled, placing my hands on his cheeks.

"On the contrary, I consider you a very safe space." Miguel sighed with relief before saying,

"If you mean it... don't run away from me this time." Our eyes met and for a split second his eyes changed crimson.

"I w-won't," I responded timidly. Even though I was actually a little scared right now; he kissed me again and I closed my eyes, fighting against my nerves.

"I haven't been with a virgin before, but I will take care of you so it will hurt as little as possible." He whispered. What does he mean by that?! And how far is he expecting to take this?

"Is that even possible?" I asked, he gave me a puzzled look in return. "I mean...are you... can you even have... s-sex?"

"... Oh... well yeah. My **** works if that's what you're asking..." My face felt like it was on fire.

"How would you know?!" My surprise seemed to amuse him,

"I would have noticed a long time ago if something was wrong with-" His words were making me too nervous so I covered his mouth. He laughed and licked my hand so I yanked it away. "I'm much more experienced than you, so follow my lead."... Much more?... it just hit me that he's been with other people and just the thought of that made me queasy.

"I think now isn't the best time," I stated, rolling over onto my side and scowling. I promised not to run, but I can postpone his plans at least... at least until I'm more comfortable with the thought of him having previous lovers. I'm not sure if that'll ever happen... though. I hate feeling like this. Miguel smirked.

"Are you getting jealous because of what I said? That's adorable." He then pinned me onto my back holding onto my wrists. "I don't agree, the best time is now..." I squeezed my eyes shut; as he kissed me then when the kisses ended I looked away from him blushing. "Do you really want me to stop here, Lemon?" I looked up at him and hugged his shoulders.

"Of course... I don't want you to stop. Stupid..." I muttered, still pouting from the hint of jealousy I was feeling, but my urge to resist him had left me. Soon we were both undressed and lost in each other. He claims he has no sense of touch or pleasure but from the sounds he made he seemed to be enjoying it, and I don't know if I should be relieved or pissed that he knew exactly how to make me feel good and ease my pain. While we were tangled together, I noticed his breath slowly change from cold to hot, and maybe I was imagining it but as he lay cuddled up next to me his body felt warm.

That night I dreamt that we were back at my apartment. Miguel was cooking ribs and vegetables in my oven and we were talking about mundane things like the weather and what type of tea to drink. After eating Miguel carried me to my bedroom and we had intercourse there for the first time in the place where we've lived together for so many days. I've never had a sexual dream that wasn't a nightmare. Usually, those types of dreams would make me wake up screaming and in a cold sweat. This dream soothed me and my heart felt warm. I felt so happy that I wanted to make it a reality as soon as possible. Instinctually, I snuggled closer to him and continued to see sweet visions of our future together.

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