1 Chapter 1

Whelp, dying sucked.

There I was, driving down the freeway on my way to work when an idiot in a pick up decided to turn in front of me. So I plowed into the truck and I didn't even take the other guy with me because I ran into the passenger side.

I think it's because my cars the same color as the road. Made it difficult to see me.

After that, it's a little fuzzy. I mean, as a fairly religious guy, I'm pretty sure I went to an afterlife. I'm also pretty sure there was some kind of argument. Or maybe I'm giving myself too much credit. Whatever. Doesn't matter.

What does matter is that I'm currently floating in a liquid-y, dark place. Not breathing and I don't need too for some reason. Occasionally, I heard the echoing of voices way in the distance. I'm not sure where it's coming from. I think it belongs to the cord that's attached my stomach. If I wasn't currently in a state of maddened bliss, I might have figured out what it was.

I think it's symbolic.

As I was pondering my bizarre circumstances, a green window with text seemed to appear in my mind. Which is a good thing because I'm not sure my eyes could comprehend actually seeing something yet.

Hello, and welcome, Green-box read. To

[Shinobi: A Naruto RPG]]

Oh, cool. I get to play video games for my afterlife!!

I consider this a blessing. Because I love RPG's and I'm sure I would've gotten bored eventually of this pleasantly warm-liquid- abyss thing. Eventually. It was really comfortable though.

The window changed.

[Select Gender: Male/Female]

'Hmm…not even bothering with a tutorial, eh? Well, I am really good at RPG's and stuff', I imagined myself selecting male since my limbs were currently non-functioning.

[Are you sure?]

Yes. I am absolutely sure.

[Change appearance]

Make me as beautiful as as you could

[Beautify By 80%]

[Confirm]

Yes

With my choice made, the window disappeared.

Huh.

Well, that's dissapointi-THE LIGHT! IT BURNS!

AND IT'S COLD.

I'm being held by these warm things!

What's happening? I…oh.

I was just born. Huh.

Well, in that case, my screaming was perfectly justified! In fact, I made a note to do as much as humanly possible because this is ABSOLUTELY BAT$# $!$ INSANE!

THE ACTUAL-

Oh, my mental cursing raged on and on, as I was wiped down with a warm rag and then subsequently handed to a bed-ridden person who was presumably my new mother.

Since I was very attached to my old mother, this thought was distressing and made me scream even more. To the point that my lungs were burning. Hey, gotta build those lungs nice and strong, right?

As I my senses started to develop, I became aware of an increasing oddity within me. It was like an electrical current, a thrum of power that hovered just beneath my skin. I wasn't really sure what was freakier, that this frankly awesome feeling existed within my body or that it seemed to be everywhere else in the world as well.

Oh, wait.

The Naruto RPG.

What I'm feeling is chakra.

I'm an idiot.

Well, that's one less mystery out of the way.

Anyway. Most of my days, when I wasn't hungry (and I was always hungry), were spent in meditation. Clearing my head, breathing and attempting to look asleep so I wasn't unnecessarily bothered were quite relaxing and pretty much the only thing I could do to adequately satisfy my adult mind. One happy side-effect of meditation was that it gave me a very keen sense of the chakra in me. And around me.

In most fiction, when characters meditate, they 'unlock their potential'. They bring to bear some hidden superpower they always had but had locked away for some reason or another. While that was extremely attractive to me, as a guy who is more or less in an extremely dangerous world and is completely dependent on other people for his safety, I know that's not how it actually works. That's not how it worked in my old world, it's not how it works here unless you're already extremely powerful.

But the main reason I did it was that, when meditating, you force your brain into a dream-like state, allowing it to process information, store it and handle it. Which was invaluable for a lot of things; like overcoming emotional trauma.

Which is something I've just been served a major helping of.

I am meditating.

I am one with the universe.

All things happen for a reason.

I am the master of my being.

My choices are my own.

I am extremely hungry.

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!

The months went on. I ended up not needing to meditate as much as I used too and my senses were developing. For some freaking reason, the people around me were speaking Japanese, which fits game-logic but doesn't make any actual sense.

Luckily, my tongue and mouth co-ordination, plus the actual lack of teeth, made it very difficult to actually communicate with them. Because getting snapped up by ROOT? At this age? Would be very bad. I mean, it might be amazing for EXP if this freaking game has any but I'd like to have some fun playing this game.

If that can even exist at this point.

So, my time was spent flailing around, And meditating because it was easier to not rage about how bored I was when I wasn't thinking about anything other than breathing.

I was a very chill child.

Something I ended up figuring out as I grew older was that I wasn't in a home with loving parents. I was actually in an orphanage, with a lot of other kids. The person that was responsible for feeding me was actually a wet nurse, rather than my biological mother.

In a way, that made me feel better but it also made me feel awkward in lots of different ways. In fact…. Nothing other than that to say.

Eventually, I was able to sit up on my own. Even more impressively, I was able to start crawling! Yay! Look at me, getting all mobile and stuff! I'm just the most adorable little thing. Life in the orphanage wasn't really that bad, either. Granted, I didn't really socialize much but there wasn't much I could do about the mental gap. They were adorable, though.

The matron of the orphanage was an old woman, but other than her skin, she showed no signs of her age. She carried herself like someone who was still very much in the prime of her life, which meant she was a ninja.

Which meant that attempting to escape her when she came to collect you for whatever reason was hopeless. Don't get me wrong, she was nice enough, but I had a thing about being carried. I could carry others just fine (no I can't) but I don't like being carried. Especially around women with large breasts, who literally just stuff you on their chests.

It makes me feel dirty, the lady is a MILF and I am a baby for God sake.

So, she picked me up from my crib, token efforts to wiggle out ceased upon exiting the crib.

Even I know accidents happen. She carries me, making fond, affectionate noises at me.

Ugh, she's going to make me sick one of these days. Well, I got sick a lot, since I have trouble burping for whatever FREAKING REAS-ahem.

She deposits me in the play area, and the various toddlers with me are all playing with various toys. Fake, baby proofed Kunai, I think were my favorite. Made me laugh whenever I saw it. I examined the area and off by itself, I saw a thick, baby book.

…no way.

I hastened over there and found that, indeed, it was the S.P.E.C.I.A.L book, ripped right from Fallout 3. The only difference was that the illustrations had a Shinobi headband. With the Vault-tech symbol on it.

Well, that confirms that I wasn't going crazy and this is, in fact, a game.

I think. First thing I did was open the book. Strength, Perception, Endurance, the dump stat, Intelligence, Agility, Luck, it was all here!

Okay, Charisma might be good if it provides bonuses to my teammates if it's anything like New Vegas but screw my teammates!

I'm sure somewhere, the Hokage, wherever he is, just got the urge to spank a kid and that kid was me. Oh well. Screw him too.

Anyway. The book disappeared broke into the light and entered in my body.

[You posses the gamer kekkai genkai]

The gamer ability performs the following...

Certain actions in his daily life gets turned into skills.

Objects turns into items.

Your body works like that of a game character.

[Sleep restores a certain amount of Hp and Mp depending upon the surroundings and status effect.]

[Available by thinking Status]

Interesting 'So i wont get my full HP And Chakra restored when i sleep in the bed? interesting.. and useful, as i now am in the naruto universe i am bound to gather unwarranted attention if i possess an unnatural ability which allows me to recover fully just because i sleep in my bed. '

See, on one hand, it will almost assuredly guarantee me perfect wins on everything. Gambling will become an absolute joke. So. Much. Money. To be made. On the other hand… Charisma makes it so people like me. I want to be liked. A lot. There were some really cool people that I wanted to befriend. Maybe turn Sasuke from his destructive path and get him some freaking therapy. Give Naruto a friend…maybe lots of friends. A high charisma character with 100 speech skill could end the stigma against him. Quickly. I don't know how much the special stats affect general gameplay. Maybe they just affected skills like in Fallout 3. Maybe they affected everything.

But if that's the case, and Luck is anything like in New Vegas? That becomes the most important stat in the game. Bar none. Intelligence is for personal preference, if I'm honest.

Sigh... let's just get over it.

'Status' I thought

Strength (STR)-1

Vitality (VIT)-1

Dexterity (DEX)-1

Intelligence (INT)-32

Wisdom (WIS)-19

Chakra Resistance increases by 1% every 10 WIS points.

Chakra Regeneration increases by 1% every 10 WIS points.

Chakra Control increases by 1% every 10 WIS points.

Luck (LUK)- 28

Physical resistance-1

Chakra (MP)- 1000,000 (Every Point Increases 100 Chakra)

Chakra Regeneration (MR)-100/Sec

Chakra Resistance- 1%

Health (HP)-40 (Every Point Increases 10 HP)

Skill List Window (Skills): This is a voice command that brings up a window that shows a list of all the skills he has learned. When the skill icon is selected it shows all the current information of that skill.

Options Window (Options): This is a voice command that brings up the options menu

Perks chakra made - Your made entirely of chakra itself. Thus, granting you a gigantic amount of Chakra.

1.Yin release (0%)- Your ability with genjutsu and anything related to spiritual energy will be enhanced.( Allows 100% faster learning rate for genjutsu related techniques)

2. Sword Prodigy (0%)- Your ability to master and Create sword techniques, is extremely high (Allow 100% faster learning rate for Kenjutsu Related Techniques)

3. Prodigy (100%) Due to your higher intellect than your class mates you will be considered a prodigy. Every Level increases your INT by 5

I could feel myself getting…smarter.

Woah.

For the first time in I don't know how long, I heard the sharp sound of a cash register ring in my ears. Green numbers appeared in my eyes, +100, with a small meter beneath it, demonstrating progress from level 1 to level 2. The other kids laughed because my startled reaction was apparently funny. A second later, the adults joined in.

Oh boy.

It's awkward...

…I wonder how long I'll have to wait until I can actually tag my skills?