17 Old Feelings and Jealous Bosses (B)

As expected, Abigail focused solely on James and I didn't get any chance to talk to her at all. I didn't want to say anything in front of James but I needed to know what her problem was. When she wouldn't give me even the tiniest attention, I left them alone and stayed in my study room burying myself in work.

I called Antonio again and asked how Claire was doing. She was still unconscious. It worried me but since Antonio assured me she'll be fine, I had to wait for morning; no matter how tormenting it was. Usually, it's times like this I have Abigail beside me. Now, I'm alone and Abigail somehow hates me. We've never argued before so seriously, never. It felt as if we're just going around in circles.

I couldn't remember doing anything wrong, so why did she want to break up? Why am I saying breakup? We're not dating, right? Do I want to date her though? Yeah, definitely. Forget about dating, I want to marry her. She's the only person I want by my side every second.

Does she want to date me? I hardly think so. Now, she has her "Mr. Newman" who lives for flirting. I need to break that bastard's jaw. Come to think of it, I've never asked Abigail out or flirted with her. She has always been like Luciana to me but we both know we have stronger feelings for each other. Or at least, we knew. It's been fourteen years since we established that and I've been married to another woman and have two kids. Abigail on the other hand has never been married or even been on a date with anyone.

So, is that it then? Does she still have strong feelings for me and I'm too dumb to understand? Was she saying she doesn't want to be best friends anymore because she wants us to upgrade our relationship? It seems possible but why would she want to date Nathaniel now?

Wait! Is she accepting him because she's tired of waiting for me to realize that she's in love with me? Can I dare to hope that she has forgiven me for getting involved with Doris?

"Oh, damn!" I'm really dense when it comes to stuff like this. One thing is for sure, I'm not letting Newman anywhere near Abigail.

Dude! Your wife just died and you're thinking about another woman? Now, I'm sounding like my Mom. I want Abigail, but I can't rush things. I don't even know how Claire will react to Abigail and I being together.

"Shut up and create a plan." I coached myself and exhaled. I need to start from somewhere. First, I need to know if I'm not just assuming things and Abigail is still in love with me. Second, I need to tell her how I feel and we can start by simply dating. Third, we're not telling Claire anything until after Doris is buried and Claire likes Abigail even a tiny bit.

"Now, that should work."

"I can see your old habit of talking to yourself is back." Abigail was in the doorway.

"Ab..." She came in immediately and wrapped me up in a hug.

"I'm really sorry." She began to sob.

"What for? You haven't done..."

"I was really harsh. This is not your fault. I should have just told you the truth."

"What truth?" I would have liked it if I could see her face, but she wasn't showing any signs of breaking the hug any moment soon.

"I don't know how to tell you."

"Try, Abby. It doesn't matter how, just let me know." She didn't say anything, didn't move and stopped sobbing.

"Abby?" She pulled back and looked straight into my eyes. We were just a few inches apart in height and that made it so intense. I nearly lost myself in her eyes; I could see my answer. My assumption was right, She's still in love with me; she never stopped. I pulled away so I could take her hands in mine.

"I thought I ruined things when I got Doris pregnant. I thought..."

"What? No. I blame myself. You wouldn't have gone to the club if I was here for you. You always came to me when you were upset and that one time you needed me most, I was away for that stupid shoot!" Wait!

"Is that why you quit modeling?" She avoided my eyes.

"I couldn't forgive myself for... Maybe if I was here and you came to me, I would have been Claire's and James' mom."

"Abigail..."

"Please don't say anything. I just wanted to let you know how I felt. This is not the right time for us to be in a relationship. Your kids just lost their Mom, they wouldn't want another female figure so soon."

"No, I'm not accepting that. This is exactly what we did last time; 'I love you, you love me... fine then, we'll be together when we're ready.' It didn't go well." She smiled a little.

"I know. After what happened with Doris when you came back, I couldn't stop blaming myself. Your Mom was right about her and who knew? If Doris knew that your mother would disinherit you then and she'd not get any money, maybe she wouldn't have wanted to get married so much and maybe she would have given birth to Claire and let you take full custody of her." She stopped and exhaled. Those same thoughts crossed my mind. If only I knew.

"That's all in the past now. We'll do it right this time. You want to be Claire and James's mother? I want that too. We'll start slow; we'll start by going on dates."

"But Claire..."

"We won't tell her for now, or James. She's a good kid, I'm sure she'll learn to love you in time. As for James, I know he's crazy about you already. But we're not giving room for anything to come in between us this time. Agreed?" That's when I got the beautiful grin I've been craving for.

"Agreed." I crushed her lips with a very passionate kiss, which I quickly broke off the moment I remembered something.

"This also means you're not going on any date with Mr. Jackass."

"Was never even considered." She replied, laughing. "It wasn't even my number I gave him, it was my lawyer's."

"Wait, that means I was right. You were only trying to get me jealous."

"Yup!"