5 Four*

My uncle nodded and finished the email and sent it to the doctor at the hospice. The answer soon arrived, as this is around the time when doctors have lunch breaks.

"Okay, Dawn, you'll be admitted to the hospice next week. During this week, we'll be giving you a few tests to see which medicine works the best for your chemotherapy. After the medicine is found, you'll be able to move to the hospice. The centre is in the suburbs, in the middle of nature, so you can go for walks, but Lucas would have to stay by your side just in case something happens."

I knew he didn't need to tell her that, as I know I'll stay by her side every second of the time we're staying in the hospice.

"We'll start testing you. There are only a few medicine combinations, so it wouldn't take long to finish. When that's done, you'll stay in the hospital room and then move when they get the room ready. I requested them to prepare a single room with enough space so Lucas can stay with you in the room just in case you need him at night.

"Lucas, I recommend you pack your things now. Although I have said that it will take a week for them to get the room ready, that's the maximum time. There is a chance they'd be ready earlier, so I suggest it's more convenient for you to have everything ready so you can go when the space is ready." My uncle spoke and I nodded in agreement.

"Do we need to stay, or can we leave?" Dawn's parents asked.

"Well, since Dawn isn't a minor, you can just leave if you wish to. I suppose it wouldn't matter if you stay, but I suppose Dawn would more likely wish you to leave."

"Yeah, you can just go away. It's better without you all near me and interfering with my choices. I'm sick of that also." Dawn spoke, and from what I could see I could tell that she didn't like having her parents around from her tone.

They just walked out and Dawn waved a hand, probably telling me to sit beside her. I shook my head, hoping she would understand I'm more comfortable sitting here instead of the spot beside her. The actual reason that I can't tell her is that she might be able to hear my quick heartbeats if I sit right beside her.

This situation is complicated for me, considering that it is what I've yearned for a long time — to be closer with Dawn and stand by her side when things are rough — but also not the very best version of my hopes. My wish become true and I'm grateful for that, but this was also not the version I was searching for.

"Lucas, since you've said you would go with Dawn, I'll give you all the information about Dawn's cancer. This will be given to you on the clipboard for you."

I sighed. I've learnt almost everything about what I'd need to know about lung cancer. The one I studied the most was small-cell lung cancer, which is also the one Dawn is currently suffering from. "You don't need to explain the basics. Just the information about how much time has passed, exactly where it has metastasised, and also the medication and type of therapy I would need to use for the stay at the hospice."

Dawn looked at me with her right eyebrow raised. I guess it's because she expected that I wouldn't know about the disease. I explained, "The doctor you're facing right now is my uncle. Since I'm quite close to him, I learnt about lung cancers, and the one I studied the most was small-cell lung cancer, or SCLC, which is what you are suffering from. Therefore, I don't need him to explain the mechanics and details about your disease."

"Then you want to be a doctor?"

That was a question I'd expected, but also the one I don't like to hear the most. I've always learnt about it, but that was only because it would be helpful for my part-time job of helping my uncle. It's something I had learned to earn money.

So I would have responded that being a doctor isn't my dream, but now things are different. With Dawn sick with the disease, I want to be able to help people with her disease. Specifically, I wished to be a doctor specialising in SCLC.

"If you asked me that before, I would have said no. But now, I think it's closer to a yes." I didn't want her to think I've given up my original dream because of her, but it was obvious to myself and my uncle that the change of thought has happened due to her. I didn't want her to suffer more, since the pain of cancer would get too much for her.

"I know all that, you don't need to tell me. I've stayed by your side by the time you've started this job." My uncle replied, rolling his eyes. It worked in lightning up the atmosphere, though, since Dawn finally cracked a smile since entering this room.

She was always pretty when she smiled. Her lips curved into a lovely crescent. Her eyes became brighter and the brightness that used to be all over her face returned slightly. It was the face I missed so much since she stopped coming to school. It was nice to see that, but knowing she had forced it a bit made my heart ache.

I hid that small sadness and smiled a small one back at her. Her eyes were sad, and sadness was an emotion I hadn't seen on her face that often.

Dawn opened her mouth and the most shocking words left of her mouth.

"You have a crush on me, right, Lucas?"