Finding Yun Tian Hua

I call your name for a tens, hundreds, thousands...I lost counts but you didn't come as what you promised. I'm so furious and lonely. I always longing for you so I traveled the whole world just to find you yet everything was vain. Many years of waiting and finding I finally found you. But instead of feeling happy I felt sad, angry, disappointed, hopeless and miserable. How come after many years of searching at last I would find out that you're already married and have children with another man? I almost lost hope in life and finally decided to end it. As I did, I should've been dead but a beautiful, carefree, kind and mysterious lady that resembled you pulled me out of mysery and death's door. Does my waiting worth it? Or it's just a wishful thinking?