2 Chapter 1

Ever feel as if your life is perfect?

Perfect set of parents, being 1st in school, being the special grandaughter and being the center of the world.

That was what I felt when I was just a kid. I am the first kid of my parents. I felt special back then. I know it might be somewhat selfish of me to say this but I wanted to feel this way all the time. But then my sister came. I still remember that night. I was left to my grandma's house because my mom was on labor.

"Ma, take care of Moi. My wife's on labor with our second child and she needs me there." My dad said to my grandma. He then squats in front of me and pats my head. "Be good. I love you."

My dad had gone and me and my grandma went inside her house.

"Are you excited to have a sister?" My grandma asked.

I could still remember at that time that I was iritated. I was their baby girl, why was it that I was just left here with my grandma as if I was a baggage? But I was pacified by my grandma at that time because I do love my grandma so much.

But I was disappointed yet again.

I was left for a long time with my grandma. I don't know how long but as a kid it was still long. I think I tried to forget that time that I felt that my parents forgot me when my sister came. Maybe I still felt this way until now and maybe this is why we're not close.

When I got back with my parents, I still can't remember the time my sister was still a baby or even as a little kid. The only time I could remember my sister as a kid was when we were toddlers. I could only realize now that what happened with when my sister was born has affected me deeply, I just did not realized it.

But I did realized early on that I did thought that if my parents are proud of me then they won't abandon me again.

I started school young. I was maybe four years old when I was in kindergarten and my mom would have enrolled me for grade school but the school only accepts grade school during five years old. I was disappointed since I wouldn't be with my friends that I got to know in kindergarten.

1st grade was when I first hurt someone, badly. His head was bleeding because I threw a piece of stone to him. I can't really remember why I did that at that time but I did remember that I was so scared of the blood.

I don't remember much at that time except I got my first ribbon as 1st honors in our class. My grandma was the one who came with me to the stage. I was disappointed as my parents weren't there as they were already busy at this time with my mom in university pursuing her diploma and my dad with his work. But I was still happy with my grandma there.

2nd grade was where I realized love with another gender. Too young you might say but I did not thought it was love at that time. It was still a crush. He was my best friend. We would play during free time in school. I could remember that I was comfortable around him.

This was also the first time I learned to cook.

My grandma taught me how to cook since there was a program in school where we bring foods with a partner every friday. I was partnered with a family friend so it was enjoyable. I also learned how to make friends at that time. It was also the first time I rode a scooter. My dad bought me that since I aas doing good in school.

3rd grade nothing really happened special except I was separated with my friends since I was transfered to a different class than them. This is also the time I realized myself that I was competitive.

4th and 5th grade was when I learned to steal.

I never stole from other people, I just stole from my parents. Maybe because I was tried as a thief the first time even though I did not do it. My mind just decided that why not do it for real then? But half of me would think that maybe if I did this they would definitely think about me more. They might give me some of their time. That I would not go to my grandma's house whenever they were not at home or celebrate my birthdays in school since no one is at home.

6th grade was when I saw him again.

We were in the same class again.

We were close once again and I thought of him as my best friend.

This was also the time when I got my first heartbreak.