7 Never Seen Her

Mason's P.O.V:

[2 Months Earlier]

"Watch it!" I snapped at yet another freshman who bumped into me.

Well, I bumped into him, but that is not the point of… anything! I'm even too pissed off to think right now.

"Woah! Calm down man," Jason said, placing a hand on my shoulder.

"Yeah, he's just a freshman dude. Take it easy," Brody added and dismissed the said freshman with an apology on my behalf.

"I'm not cleaning up after you again," Brody chirped and Jason floated on the same boat with him.

"Why are you even this pissed off bro?" Jason asked and I stayed silent in response.

"It all started when he got that text in class," Brody said, suddenly turning into Sherlock Holmes as I ignored and started walking away.

They trailed behind me and I tried listening to their investigation and piecing together of clues, but I obviously failed hard.

My mind was already preoccupied, constantly going back to the text that I dreaded receiving... but still did.

I did not want that text to pop up on the screen of my phone... but it still did.

From Char:

I wish I had better news, but her condition is much worse. Mom and Dad wanted to keep this from you they knew how much it would affect you, but I thought you deserved to at least know. The doctors said she only has a week left.

Text from my dear sister. At the end she put an emoji with one tear. That came in the middle of biology class and I couldn't concentrate for the rest of the class.

Why was my mind so diverted?

Because all of it was my fault. I could not stop thinking of that one night.

Why in the world did I forget? I volunteered to do that one simple job every night before going to bed.

But instead, I felt like I was too angry to do the job. It was more important to me than anything else, but I was too much of a coward to go to her.

Instead of doing my job, I brought Amy home and spent the night fucking her as a way of release. I thought it was better than going to her and being mean to her because of my anger.

She never needed that, but in reality, she needed me there, angry or not. She needed someone beside her through these tough times and I, of all people, realized that too late.

She had warned me, but the warning fell on deaf ears. I heard her, but never listened.

She told me to get my anger under control. Otherwise... I would lose something that I value the most because of it. And in this case, it's her.

I'm going to lose her because I never listened to her. Because of my arrogance and stupidity.

She's the best person I know and no one can ever impact my life the way she did.

Nonetheless, the world is cruel. It punishes the people who do not deserve it, the people who have suffered enough but have still fought back valiantly.

The people who cannot take any more are forced to do so.

But she doesn't deserve more. She deserves anything but.

The world is punishing her for my mistake. I made that mistake. But she is getting punished instead. Why won't the world punish me instead?

FUCKING TAKE ME YOU CRUEL WORLD!

She deserves to live but I don't.

Mother nature, or whatever keeps this world in fucking balance, please don't take her, take me instead, I wouldn't give a flying fuck as long as she is okay.

I felt the anger rise in my veins and it wasn't directed at anyone in particular. It was directed at... myself.

"AAARRRGGGHHH!" I grunted and the next thing I knew was my fist in cold dented metal.

I had just punched a random locker and dented it.

Aside from the stinging pain in my fist, I felt a tad better.

The whole hall fell silent at my outburst and I just stayed still breathing hard.

After a while, most of them left after Brody and Jason somehow got them all to ignore me. Soon enough, the whole hallway was clear and everyone was in the cafeteria for lunch.

"Bro, are you okay?" Brody asked from beside me.

"Yeah," I said when my blood didn't feel as hot before, "I'm fine," I finished, silently appreciating both of them for their concern. Thank God for best friends.

I looked at the back of my now bleeding hand after seeing the blood stains on the locker. I couldn't help but think of how much I deserved this shit.

"Let's go to the nurse's office and get that taken care of bro," Jason interrupted my thoughts and I shook my head in response.

"You guys go have lunch, I'll go on my own," I replied, thinking that they have already done enough for me.

"Are you sure? We can still come with and skip lunch," Jason implored and I pressed on.

"It's fine, I'll go alone, you guys go eat."

They nodded and started leaving but I still felt the reluctance in their movements.

I watched them disappear around the corner and I decided to get out of this place. I wanted to see her and I would skip school just for that.

My anger with myself somehow inflated once more and I abruptly turned around. Unfortunately enough, I bumped into someone in my angry state and just felt like fighting now.

Maybe this one will fight back and give me an actual run for my money.

...Or not.

"What the actual fuck!" I exploded at the girl I had just bumped into.

Maybe just an argument is what I needed at this moment to get rid of some tension - to release some of my anger.

Her bag had slipped from her grasp, falling to the floor from our collision. I wouldn't blame her for any of this, but I'm just going to.

She looked closely at me, scanning my face for a few seconds, and then just ignored me. I watched as she crouched down and started picking up the stuff that spilled from the bag.

What the hell?

She didn't seem like she cared at all, like I was just giving her bullshit she didn't need in her life. Interesting...

She didn't seem like she was a freshman, however, I had never seen he before in my life.