2 can't tell

we are moving next to each other, I was trying to hold her hand, but I it hard more than in movies.

whenever I move forward, her hand automatically move far away, it scary for me, if I didn't hold her hand, then I will be leave behind.

she notice me trying, she hold my hand, it was kind of relief to me, now I can their is someone who won't leave me behind.

" you don't have to be so nervous about it, your hand are warm"

" your hand are warm and soft"

I want to hold her hand, till the hand.

" how much time it take us to reach at festival site"

" we are going to reach soon, why don't to see me"

" what do you mean"

" I am wearing this kimono like you said, what you think about it"

" it look cute on you, you also but so much effort on you hair too, I want to kiss you"

" sorry what did I just say, it embrassing"

i don't know what wrong with me, but I really what to kiss her.

" if you want then we can"

I was moving towards her, I am about to do my first kiss, but suddenly land shaking, it was earthquake, building was falling.

we are about to die, but she puss me and I survive, when I look at her.

her 60% body crushed, she was about to die, I can't move her.

she touch my face, she was about to say her last word, my eyes were filled with tears, I was panic.

" we are going to meet soon, so wait for me"

" yes we will going to meet each other, no matter how far you go, we find each other"

after telling her last word to me, she died, my eyes open, my whole body shake.

I forgot everything what I saw in my dream, in my classroom, teacher introduced new transfer student.

when she introduce her name to class, it feel like I hear this name before, and her face look familiar.

teacher give her set next to me, time passed, now it time to go home, at the end of the school she talk to me.

" do you remember me, I was your neighbor and we usually play with each other, I hear about you parents"

" I don't remember you,I have to go home"

" can I go with you, I am your neighbor now, so we should become friends like old time"

" don't you dare talk about past and I am not interested in human anymore"

I become cold because of my past, but I don't have any regret, I know I am worng but my mood is not in my control anymore.

now I am finding other human beings annoying, I can't trust them anymore.

I can understand why she following me, I know she is my neighbor and childhood friend, I have when someone pity me.

she rejected offer of other, who want to go home with her.

I really hate if she get along with me, my image is bad in school, I know people believe that I am loner and failure.

I know they think I am freak, I should be in mental hospital, I shouldn't be live in human society.

I just hate human, I am overthink again, I want to stop my brain, it become my enemy I want to free for suffering.

when I was think all this shit, she call out my name, I become calm.

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