97 I think i am falling for you

Patrick.

Jack is giving me a blow job. 

Fucking hell. 

Is this my imagination?

Have I finally lost my mind? Did I want this so badly that I created this in my bed? This might be a dream; he might not be here right now. he might still be with the girl he left with at the club. I probably fell asleep eating ice cream and dreamt this all. 

If this is a dream, I don't want to wake up. If I can only have him in my dreams. Then I want to stay asleep forever. I don't even know when these feelings in me even started developing. This is all too quick. I don't even think I felt this strongly for Lance. Lance was someone I could talk to in my so very lonely world. He came like a light, made me feel things I thought I would never feel again. 

I wanted to love him.