10 Past Memories (2)

Zach followed me into the apartment and sat on the couch while I put away my things. After settling things down, I made my way slowly to the couch and took a seat beside Zach.

What was I thinking? I had only met Zach two days ago and I am already willing to spill my guts to him about my private love life, of which I did not even talk to Jessica or Azure about.

Although I told myself I was crazy to even have trusted him and allowed him in my house just after two meetings, I did not feel unease when he was around.

In fact, it was the exact opposite. The moment I got to know Zach in person, I immediately felt comfortable and secure with him.

With Zach's eyes staring intently at me, I took a deep breath and poured out my entire soul to him, if faeries had a soul.

"My boyfriend's name is Jared, as you would have heard from earlier. He is my first love. Or so I think. I met him when I was seventeen years old, and after we became friends, I had feelings for him and confessed. He felt the same, and we started dating. This would be the end of the second year since I'm nineteen turning twenty now, and it's Autumn. I personally felt like if I were to make love to a man, it would be my one and only true love and I would not do it with any other person. This means I'm still a virgin at twenty. Lame, huh? At first Jared seemed understanding, and we would not go past the stage of kissing. Then, a few months after we started dating, he became demanding one date night, and forced me to go further with him. When I refused, he ghosted me for two months, and I thought we had silently broken up. I did not bother to contact him then, since I was busy with college." I said while biting my lip and continued,

"After that two months, he finally responded to me and apologised for treating me like how he did the past half year. I have to admit, I still loved him after all that had happened, and I accepted his apology. We were a happy couple for another half a year with small arguments here and there, but nothing we couldn't fix. Of course, I was still against the idea of making love to him. On New Year's eve, something horrible happened. I caught him cheating on me with some girl we bumped into once during a date at a bar. He spent New Year with me, but I was feeling depressed and called him out. He got mad and hit me, guilt tripping me by saying that I always refused him sexually and he was a normal man with desires who was tired of waiting for me."

Before I knew what was happening, fresh, hot tears were rolling down my cheeks and Zach was embracing me.

I was so, so stupid for ever hooking up with Jared. And now, I felt more trust towards someone I had just met for two days than towards Jared. Yet, it felt like I could not just leave him.

I leaned against Zach's chest and cried into his shirt as he held me with his left arm and smoothed my head with his right hand.

Great, now Zach has to see me like this. Not even my friends have got to know about my situation with Jared.

"It's okay, cry it out. I'm here if you need more time to talk about it." Zach whispered in a hushed voice into my ear as he comforted me.

"Me, being the idiot I was, felt guilty and apologised to him for accusing him of something that could not be helped, when he should have been saying sorry to me. I continued to be together with him, up till now. I started regretting being with him about a month ago, but I didn't have the chance to talk to him about breaking up, because he would treat me extremely nice whenever we met up, and that made me angry at myself that I could even think of a break up with him. Not to mention whenever I talked about the girl he was cheating on me with, he would get enraged and hit me. After all this.... deep down in my heart, I think I still like him. Which is also one of the reasons I haven't bring myself to break off the relationship." I choked and started to calm myself down.

I looked up at Zach with slight surprise. I did not think he would just sit there and listen to me.

Zach kept quiet, which made me glad as I wanted to get rid of all the negative emotions, so that I would not be bawling my eyes out when he talked to me.

With Zach not saying anything, we just laid in that position in silence, with an occasional sniff from me.

"Feeling better now?" Zach asked and patted my back after a few minutes passed.

I nodded, lowering my eyes.

"I'm sorry, your shirt is all wet now." I sniffed.

"It's alright, as long as you are okay." Zach replied.

His beautiful and concerned eyes stared into mine as he studied me to make sure I was not lying about feeling better. Suddenly, I yawned.

Zach raised an eyebrow and chuckled. I let out a squeak as he picked me up swiftly bridal style and stood up.

He walked to my bedroom and laid me down on the bed. Acting like a dad, he tucked me under the bed covers and told me to get some sleep.

I smiled and closed my eyes, whispering a 'thank you' and 'goodnight' to Zach.

"You're so cute, Lila." Zach lowered his head and kissed my forehead.

I was already half asleep at that moment and did not respond. Did he really just kiss me? What a long night it has been.