Chapter 1

The day the rain broke the long hot spell, Ryan realised two things. Firstly, he was in love. He loved Jamie Holt with the whole of his heart. Secondly, he was losing him. He leaned his head against the cool of the window in the bedroom, fingertip tracing the raindrops.

It started a few weeks ago. Phone calls where Jamie answered yes or no and then hung up. Nipping out with no real explanation of where he was going. The small matter of changing the password on his phone. Not that Ryan ever looked, but…He rubbed at the pain in his chest. They’d clicked so immediately the first time they met, despite being polar opposites. Jamie was shy, reserved, handsome; Ryan was…not. Jamie was all but in the closet, Ryan was…out there. Perhaps it was only to be expected that the cracks would appear. That someone as amazing as Jamie would eventually want someone more like himself. He’d tried so hard not to let it punch him back to that agonising world of uncertainty that had been his life before Jamie. Tried so hard. But the evidence was undeniable. He wasn’t being insecure and neurotic, he was being realistic.

He moved and stood in front of the mirror and ran his fingers through his hair. Maybe the electric blue streaks in his fake, white-blond hair had been a step too far? Short around the sides, the top was long, floppy, and now fabulously blue. Together with the eyeliner, it certainly made his blue eyes pop, but was it a bit much? Jamie had the most beautiful hair. Dark, mahogany brown. So soft and silky. It was everything that was respectable. Just like the rest of him.

He’d decided that morning that he needed a plan. He’d moped about long enough. A plan to show Jamie how loved he was. How much he needed him. He peered through the window at the sound of a car engine and smiled. Just the man.

He bounded downstairs a few at a time and opened the door. “Aiden!” He laughed and pulled the man into a huge hug and got one in return.

“Let me in before I drown.” Aiden shimmied past him to get out of the rain. “It’s vile out there.” He shook his head and sprayed drops everywhere.

Ryan ducked and flapped his hands before taking his coat. “Thanks for coming.”

Aiden shuddered and followed Ryan into the kitchen. “So, what’s the emergency?” he asked, rubbing his hands together.

“It’s a total emergency. Jamie’s going off me. I need help.” He switched the coffee machine on.

Aiden’s brows went up. He looked genuinely stunned. “What?”

“No word of a lie. I know it’s hard to believe, I mean…” Ryan gestured at himself and raised his eyebrows. He and Aiden had been friends since school. He loved him like a brother, but it was easier to banter than tell him how he really felt or let him see how heartbroken he was.

“Don’t be daft. Jamie adores you.” He frowned. “Where is he?”

Ryan raised his eyebrows. “You tell me.”

“I’ve no idea. I haven’t spoken to him in days. Ry, what’s going on? Why would you think he doesn’t want you anymore?” His dark eyes were serious. It made Ryan feel wobbly.

“He’s going off me.” He had to look away as he said it.

“Going off you? The last time I saw him he was plastered all over you. Trying to get to your tonsils.”

Ryan grinned at the memory. Jamie didn’t often go for displays, but when he did, he really went for them and blushed like a virgin afterwards.

“Yeah. He was.” Ryan shook his head. “But. There are phone calls.”

Aiden shrugged. “And?”

“Phone calls where he just answers yes or no. Like he can’t talk.”

“Not exactly conclusive evidence. Jamie’s not massively talkative.”

“He nips out and doesn’t say where he’s going.”

“Again, not exactly a crime.”

“He’s changed the password on his phone and his laptop.”

Aiden frowned. “You look at his phone and his laptop?”

“Of course not,” Ryan said, outraged.

“Well, how do you know the password has changed?”

Ryan sniffed and looked away. “Anyway. I’m not taking this lying down. He fell for me once; he can do it again. I’m going to woo him and win him over.”

“Woo him…” Aiden’s face was a picture. “What are you? Some kind of fricking Victorian mill owner?”

Ryan gave him the eye. “Woo him. I’m going to take him away for a weekend. Somewhere stylish and gorgeous, so I need a fabulous wardrobe. I need you to shop with me.”

“Okay. Where are you taking him?”

“Little boutique hotel on the east coast. It’s normality all the way, so I need clothes.” He hesitated, took a breath, then let it out. “Proper clothes.”

Aiden raised an eyebrow. “Proper?”

“You know what I mean.” Ryan rubbed his forehead and sighed. “I wonder if I’m a bit much sometimes, you know?” He flapped his hands.