4 Chapter 4 Bonding

The weeks after that became easier and the temptation to kill myself faded away as we both got into a good routine. Me and Loki spend every waking hour together. We cook together, Loki often making me breakfast as he is up before me and we begin training together. He helped me to connect with my magic and how to use it, in so many ways. Exploring my other abilities and I'm learning to defend myself. I can now use my magic easier and since Loki can speak telepathically, we do it sometimes when we are in different rooms. Just for fun and I enjoy it, a lot. I see why Loki enjoys his magic so much and I rather like it. Maybe I could have a future where I use it to help people. All I know is that life feels better.

We are in the gym and Loki is helping me with focusing on creating the elements to control instead of just using what is there. I am currently creating orbs of them and all I can see is the lines of them but they are there and it's amazing that I can do this. Loki says my hands are glowing gold every time I use my magic and I wish I could see it but I am so glad I can do it.

"You are naturally gifted." Loki tells me.

I smile at this, "I see why you love your magic so much. You are right, magic is a gift."

"It really is." He says, sounding so happy, "And you are amazing with it."

"Only because I had an excellent teacher." I say, making him chuckle, "And I had no idea how fun having magic would be."

He nods, "It's one of the reasons I started learning. To find new ways to prank my brother and cause mischief."

This makes me laugh, "Hence the God of Mischief."

"Exactly." He states, "What about you and Tony? I noticed he hasn't come to the floor once since you moved in."

I feel my smile falter and I stop using my magic, making the orbs vanish, "Ever since the accident my brother and I have become distant. He used to visit me in hospital but as the surgeries went on, he couldn't stand the guilt I guess and kept his distance. We still talk but I guess he can't stand seeing me like this."

He signs in frustration, "I get that but trust me on this, try and reach out to him. You don't want to lose your brother like I nearly did."

"Do you mean New York?" I ask, slightly curious.

I can make out him shaking his head, "I was jealous of him when I was younger and it only got worse when I got older. I barely got past it when… when it happened. Don't waste value time like I did."

This makes me smile, "You are very good with advice Loki and you are a good man, no matter what happened in New York."

"You really don't care about New York at all? About what I did?" He asks me, not quite believing it.

I shake my head, "No I don't. You were controlled Loki and I know you didn't want to do what you did. So no I don't care as I know you are a good man otherwise you wouldn't have helped me and you know it."

He is about to say something but then I hear footsteps and someone else is here. Loki also hears it and we both look towards the door as I see the outline figure of Tony come in. This isn't going to end well and I fear he is going to launch at Loki.

"Tony?" I speak up, both of us getting to our feet, "Is everything ok?"

He comes over and I notice Loki has moved away from me, probably waiting for a back clash for being close to me. But Tony isn't yelling at him if anything he seems completely focused on me.

"I just got back from a few missions and Jarvis showed me the footage, from a few weeks ago…. When you were at the pool… you tried to kill yourself?" He exclaims.

I feel my face drain off colour, "Tony…"

"Katrina you petrified me." He tells me, "Why didn't you tell me? Why didn't you tell me you felt that low? I could have been here for you. I should have been here."

I give him a look, "How could I? Tony you are my brother but you haven't been around. You've been running off trying to cure me or find a way to make my life better. Which I appreciate but you left me alone and I fell into a low place."

He signs in frustration, "I'm an idiot, I didn't realise. I thought you were ok."

"So did I." I admit, "I thought I would be ok, I thought I would move past everything I had lost and find something else to do. But I couldn't. I saw myself as a freak and I wanted to die. And honestly, if it weren't for Loki and his silver tongue, I would have done it."

"He was supposed to stay away from you." He says bluntly.

I move closer to him, "He saved my life. You saw the footage. He convinced me to not kill myself and comforted me, looked out for me. He has made me feel better about myself, about my magic, about everything." I reach him, "You know his actions in New York were not his own and you don't have to believe him. But I do and I trust him. He saved my life Tony. I would be dead if it weren't for him."

He signs in defeat, "Please don't scare me again."

"No promises."

Then he hugs me and I hug him back, gripping me tightly and I can tell I scared him. I completely forgot Jarvis would show him the footage. But he knows and this might bring us closer, I hope it does.

Tony pulls away, "I have to go away for a week, an Avengers mission but after that I will be here for you always. I will be here for you sis, I promise."

I smile, "Thanks brother."

Then he turns to look at Loki, both staring at each other but I can't tell what expressions are on their faces. I can only see the outline but they don't look tense, from what I can tell.

"Thank you Reindeer games for what you did." Loki nods, "But if you hurt my sister…"

Loki interrupts him, "I have no intentions on harming Katrina. She is my friend and I would never hurt her. I will look out for her."

Tony nods, "Then I will put my trust in you, just don't make me regret it." Then he looks at me, "I'm leaving tomorrow but if you need anything, please call me. If you feel low…"

"I won't be hurting myself any time soon brother. I feel much better." I reassure him, "Now go and pack. And if we need anything, I will get Jarvis to call you."

Then he hugs me again before he leaves, seeming more relaxed and so do I. Tony knows and it is bringing us close again. On top of that he seems to accept Loki which means I can spend time with him without him getting fussy about it. He saved my life and shouldn't be blamed for his actions. At least Tony now can see that Loki is a good man. He has always been a good man.

"You defended me?" Loki whispers as he moves to stand beside me, "You didn't have to."

I turn to look in his general direction, "Loki I wanted to. You are not the bad man they made you out to be and you saved my life. Off course I was going to defend you so you better get used to it, you are my best friend after all."

He seems happy by that and takes my hand and kisses it, "As you are mine."

I feel my heart flutter at the gesture but I try not to think about as we spend the rest of the day together chilling in the lounge. Before we make dinner and we watch tv or at least I listen to it. But the whole time I am thinking about Loki. The man beside me and everything about him, everything I like about him. It makes my heart beat race and I think I am falling for him. I think I like him as more than a friend and I'm so glad he taught me how to put my mind barriers up or he would hear my mind screaming out.

It's just… I can't help but like him. I know he is an Asgardian/Jotun and I am just a mortal but I'm so attracted to him. I might be unable to see him but his personality warms my heart. He might have a dark past that he isn't ready to talk about but apart from that, he is so open and honest with me. So caring, comforting and kind. But he is also has this witty side, full of sarcasm, desire and an ego full of passion for the things and people he loves. Not to mention he is protective. I'm falling for him but I won't indulge my feelings. Not when I don't think he likes me the same way and he probably won't. I am blind but being friends with him, is enough for now.