1 PROLOGUE
Sitting beside his mother, the boy prayed hard to God. He prayed for his mother's soul. He prayed to take his life and grant his mother health.
He held his mother's hand with both of his. His eyes gleamed with tears. But he blinked back every one of them. He cannot let his crying face be the last thing his mother saw.
"Everything's going to be alright," he told his mother. But he himself didn't believe it. Not after what the doctors said. Bleeding under the skin has already started. She had only a few minutes. he prayed and prayed for a final miracle. But he saw no ray of hope, no glimpse of light.
"Hang on. You cannot leave like this." Not like his father left. Leaving his mother alone with a boy to raise. But it wasn't his father's fault. No one can ignore the call of death.
After his father died, His mother gave her heart and soul to bringing up her child. Good education, food, shelter. She even married a bastard because he agreed to carry out all the expenses of his education. His mother was all he had left.
His mother looked at him with tired eyes. She forced a smile which took every bit of strength in her body and said, "Sing."
"What?" he asked unsure of what he had just heard.
"Fallen leaves-" she couldn't finish the line. She started breathing heavily. Unable to hold back tears anymore, he let it fall over his cheeks. Then wiping away the tears, he started in a broken voice, the song that her mother sang to him every night. To keep him going.
Fallen leaves on the ground
Had once been green
Their story can be found
When you listen to the broken sound
If you follow your heart
Through up and down
You'll always find your way even
When nobody's around.
He finished his song and knew that he was all alone. She had left him. For a greater journey. Life after death. He released her hand and put it upon her chest. He did a final prayer to God for her mother. So that she can get peace.
He looked at her mother one more time.
Gone.
He was alone.
******************************
He stood in front of his mother's grave. Thoughts cloudy. No tears came that day. He let himself think that his mother had found peace. The peace that was taken away the day his father died. The day she had to marry that bastard for his sake. He let out a sigh and stared at the colorful flowers upon her grave.
A bunch of white lilies.
Lots of roses.
Daisies.
Only one sunflower.
One sunflower represented the only person on earth whom he loved. The only sunshine in his life. His mother.
The funeral was held in a small church near their home in Iceland. The church with its mahogany walls and white marble statues itself presented a mournful aura. A lot of people showed up in the funeral. None of them their actual relatives. Most of them were town people and his step father's relatives. Many of them gave him hug or a pat in the back and said, "Everything's going to be alright."
No it's not going to be. He told the exact same thing to his mother. Look how that turned out.
His step father managed to shed a few drops of tears during his speech. Everyone else was whispering how he loved her so much. But he knew the truth. He was the one to witness her being tortured every single day. But she accepted everything for his sake. For that he was never gonna forgive himself.
He kept staring at the inscriptions on the gravestone and recalled the fake tears of his step father. One of her own poems was on the gravestone. She made up songs, poems, phrases regarding every step of life.
He remembered the clear Sunday morning when her mother beamed at him and gave him an envelope.
"That will be on my gravestone. You will not open it till then," she kissed his forehead and started humming. He became worried and asked her, "Are you feeling sick?"
"No. I am fine. It just came up my mind and I love it." She smiled at him and went to humming. He hadn't thought about the envelope since. When she took her final breath, he found the envelop in his wardrobe under all those faded jeans. He didn't know whether it was just a hunch or his mother somehow knew her time of death.
Putting an end to the quest of search
There she goes at the end of March
Blown away by a warm summer
Back to the soil to rest in peace
The evening wind sent chills through his bone. He looked around him. Everyone has left a long time ago. He wanted to spend his last hours with his mother. So he did.
He felt his legs were sore from standing in one position for a long time. He shifted in one place for a few times and started walking towards the place which was once called home.
He walked on the footpath and read all the signs he could find just like he did when he first came to Iceland. His mother and he used to stroll through here and she made him read all the Icelandic signs. The language that came to him this easily now was difficult when they moved to Iceland after his father died.
He stood in front of the big house. It was bigger than most other houses in this town. But the house they used to live in before was bigger. He took the key from under the mattress and opened the door as quietly as possible. He didn't want to give heads up to that bastard that he had come home. Now that his mother wasn't around, there was a big possibility he would blow his daily torture routine on him.
He didn't mind standing up to him, facing him. But his mother prevented him. Every time he clenched his fists, his mother opened it and smiled. Told him it was okay. But only it wasn't.
He found that bastard knocked out on the couch. He managed to get drunk on the day of his mother's funeral. If only those people could see him now. What he really is.
He assessed the house one last time. His mother had decorated with her own will. That much freedom was granted to her. Bits of colors were spread all across the house. Just like a rainbow.
He looked for matches.
This was the moment where he would leave the mortal body and let his soul be free. There was nothing holding him back. he lit the match and held it. He held it until the match burned and reached his fingers. Then he flipped it to the curtains.
No turning back now.
The fire was taking a lot of time to catch.
He stared at it for a long time. His vision started to blur.
He saw his mother. He saw her saying, "It's not your time. You have work to do."
But it's too late.
The fire had caught.
It was spreading like a wild fire.
That bastard was still passed out. His vision was blurring due to the smoke. He thought he saw a figure hover over him. Trying to save him. He struggled to let lose. He had nothing in this world now.
His father flashed before him. Disappointment in his eyes. His mother screamed in his ears. He couldn't take it anymore. The weight of what he had done dawned to him. But he was already losing it. His vision dimmed and all was black.
