11 Chapter 11

I drove home in the dark, trying to steady my heart. What am I doing? I wondered as I pointed my car toward home. I had so much on my mind that it practically drove itself home. I took a deep breath, trying to steady myself. What the hell am I doing? But there was something about Lance that I just couldn't describe. Besides his incredible good looks, there was something else about him I felt secure, treasured like a princess around him. It was as if he had already placed me on a pedestal, treating me like royalty. I had never been treated like that before, and I knew that I could easily get used to it.

When I got home, Steven was gone. Obviously, he had already left for work-if he even came home at all-even though it was Saturday. I should be off from work the next day, but I really had no desire to have a confrontation with Steven, even though I knew that we needed to talk soon.

I took a deep breath to steady myself, pulled the car into the garage, and walked into the house. I thought about flipping on the television, but I wasn't in the mood for it. So, I turned off all the lights in the house and went upstairs to bed, thinking of Lance.

***

I set my alarm and got up early, before sunrise, and got ready for work. I fixed coffee, dried my long blonde hair, then decided to pull back the front of my hair and left the back to cascade over my shoulders into loose waves.

I looked in my walk-in closet filled with clothes. I liked the way I had it arranged according to color, with blues and grays together, then pinks and purples-every color of the rainbow was represented. I chose a navy skirt and matching pumps, along with a white blouse, and I was ready for the day.

As I drove to work, my thoughts kept falling back to Lance. I knew that allowing myself these thoughts was dangerous, but I just couldn't help it. Why was I attracted to him?

I pushed the thought aside, determined to break it off with Lance the next time that I saw him. No matter what was happening or not happening in my personal life, I couldn't bring myself to cheat on my husband.

I brought my car to a stop after I pulled into the parking lot of the hospital and turned off the key. It was still dark out, but the sun would soon dawn on another day. Suddenly, someone knocked on my car window. I startled, and was surprised to see Lance. He looked impeccable in a gray Armani suit and black sunglasses, even though it was still dark. I rolled my eyes.

"How are you this morning?" he asked, looking at me with those incredible eyes over his sunglasses.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, getting out of my car as he held my door. Then, I hit the automatic lock button behind me. "Are you stalking me?"

"Hardly," he replied with a sly smile. "I have business with Drake, but running into you again is a happy surprise." Then, he looked up at the sun that was slowly starting to peek its head through the clouds. "May I walk you in?"

"Of course," I said, tucking my purse under my arm as I walked by his side.

"I'm surprised to see you here today," he said, holding the door open for me.

"I could say the same for you," I returned, walking into the hospital.

Sherrie and Beatrice were behind the counter this morning and their mouths dropped open when they saw Lance. He appeared not to notice their reaction, but nodded to them pleasantly as he passed.

"Lance, I have to talk to you privately," I asked in a low voice.

"About what?" he asked, already pulling me into an empty office room.

"Lance, I can't see you anymore," I said, looking into his eyes. "Please, don't pursue me again."

"Is that what you want?" he asked, looking into my eyes.

"It is," I replied. If it was another time, another place, then things could be different, but I wasn't available and had too much baggage.

"As you wish," he said with a nod.

I nodded, relieved that the conversation was over. I had been dreading it all morning. "Well, this is where I leave you, then," I said, turning toward the door. "I have to get to work."

"If you must," he said with a sigh.

I walked out the door, not looking behind when it clicked closed. I was already feeling his absence, but relieved at the same time as I deposited my purse in the dimly lit locker room, donned a lab coat and headed out to the floor.

"Good morning, Dr. Reynolds," Rosa said, handing me a chart, looking inconspicuously over my shoulder. "Who's Mr. Smokin' Hot?"

"Lance Steel," I answered coolly. "He's a hospital benefactor." I looked at the chart noncommittally as I slung a stethoscope around my neck. "What are you doing here, Rosa? Aren't you off today?"

"I wish," she said, rolling her eyes. "Drake changed my schedule and I have to work."

"Didn't he ask you first?"

"Are you kidding? Does he ever?"

"Would you like for me to talk to him for you?" I asked, concerned.

"No," she said, taking a deep breath. "The hospital is short of help right now as it is and we need all the help we can get."

"Well, let me know if you change your mind."

"Thanks," she replied. "It's nice to be loved." There was a sparkle in her eye.

"And you know I love you, too," I replied, giving her a wink. "Well, let's get to work."

"You have a patient waiting in examining room four " Rosa began, starting our day.

The morning went by uneventfully, but throughout the day, I kept thinking involuntarily of Lance. I really didn't want to, but my eyes kept searching for him of their own accord. I hoped that I wouldn't see him again, but knew that it was inevitable here in the hospital.

"Leila, stat!" Leo said that afternoon. "We have a serious situation."

"What is it?" I asked as I hurried down the corridor beside him.

"Gunshot victims."

"How many?"

"Three."

"What happened?"

"Drug deal gone bad?" he said, breaking into a run. "Who knows? It's not our job to know. Our job is to fix them up."

Leo and I worked all afternoon and throughout the day, trying to save their lives. Dr. Amy Ryan performed surgery on one victim, but she lost him. Dr. Nash performed surgery on the other-a teenage girl-and she would make it. They were able to successfully remove a bullet and it hadn't touched any vital organs.

I worked on the third victim-a teenage boy with three gunshot wounds. I tried to save him, working on him for hours. He lived for a while, but then his heart stopped and I couldn't revive him. This was one part of my job that I couldn't get used to: losing patients. I had to tell his mother that he didn't make it and I held her hand while she cried. I was strong for her, but tears filled my eyes, too. These types of deaths were senseless. When would people ever learn?