Chapter 15

Gabe brought the car to a halt in front of his gate.

While we waited for it to open, I needed to remember to breathe. Above us, on a field of velvet darkness, the moon peeked through lingering clouds. Just like me, she had yet to decide whether to show herself off or keep on behind the thin veil. Dreamily, I walked the few steps leading up to the front door. Gabe's steady hand on my lower back guided me inside where the cozy living room welcomed us. He turned on a couple of lights and headed for the bedroom with my luggage. I started to follow him but thought better of it; I was afraid to face the Aboriginal painting of Creation. Was I ready for my own Dreamtime? To plant a seed and hope it would blossom into the passionate death-defying love I sought? Was I ready to leap and trust the safety net of my magic to be there? To be left alone with my insidious ghosts in the dimly lit living room didn't agree with me either.

I sat on the soft sofa facing the silent fireplace. Gabe came back and stopped to trace his hand across my shoulder before moving on to build a fire. It didn't take him long, and soon bright flames echoed our beating hearts. I turned my face toward the dark window and caught my own reflection staring back at me, my eyes absurdly wide, framed by the thick curtain of my dark hair.

I looked afraid. Hell, I felt afraid.

I looked at Gabe's back and opened my mouth, ready to apologize only to realize I didn't know what for. I closed my mouth, kicked my boots off, and tucked my legs beneath me. Leaning forward I reached to touch him.

He turned to look at me; his eyes blazed with every shade of sunset, burning with flames trapped behind his eyelashes. In a blink, he was suddenly on the sofa next to me, running his hands along my bare arms. He drew me against him. Brushing a hand on my hair, he settled my head against his steady heart and asked me if I would like to take a bath after such a long and labored day.

"That sounds like a marvelous idea," I whispered, relaxing against his chest.

"You're welcome to use either bathtub, but the guest bathroom is more comfortable than mine."

"What are you going to do while I take a bath?" I asked. I lifted my head and found his chin an irresistible temptation. I began to nibble at it.

"I'm going to shower and then, if you'd care for something to eat, I could fix us a snack."

"I'm not hungry after our late lunch. How about I meet you back here in a little while?"

"No worries, take your time."

With effort I raised myself off the sofa and went to grab my overnight bag, thinking that maybe it was a blessing I didn't have sexy lingerie with me.

Yeah! Like that was going to stop us tonight.

I filled the tub with hot water and added some of my own amber blend. Soon, the entire bathroom steamed in a fragrant cloud. I quickly stripped off my clothes and tied my hair in a high bun. I lowered my body into the hot water. It felt heavenly. I relaxed and exhaled, releasing all the worries roiling in my navel. I closed my eyes and allowed the gentle sloshing of the water to soothe me into a light meditation. Time drifted and I lost track of it.

I finally stirred when the bathwater had cooled down to barely lukewarm. Aware I had gained my confidence and strength back, I briskly dried myself. Surprised at the power I had drawn from the water, I mused with the idea that despite my skepticism, I might be turning into a liquid woman after all.

I wanted to join Gabe as quickly as possible. Someone inside of me had decided to trust him, to accept, even if only for the moment. I didn't think he was Xavier.

Was that an issue? I still felt torn between my soul mate in the abstract ideal and the vibrant man awaiting me in the next room. But I knew I was falling in love, and I wanted to be with him tonight. No worries. No mental jerking off.

I brushed my hair and slipped into a white ribbed tank top and blue flannel bottoms, and walked back to the living room with my own heartbeat echoing every step I took.

Gabe knelt in front of the fire wearing a pair of flannel shorts that almost matched my pants. I smiled. He heard me and turned, wiping his hands on the shorts.

"Nice pants," he said, taking in my pajamas. Pointedly, he glanced at his own shorts.

I chuckled. "I guess we just have the same taste in clothes we lounge around in."

He patted the carpet, inviting me to join him by the fire. I sat cross-legged right in front of him. He took hold of my ankles, spread my feet apart, and pulled me closer. He wrapped my legs around his waist. With his strong hands around my hips, I felt he could snap me in two if he chose.

The fireplace heat warmed my back, slowed my heart, and gave me confidence. I raised my own hands to caress his glowing chest. His skin felt smooth and warm to the touch. I felt the pressure of his hands tightening on my lower back.

I inhaled the need in his stormy eyes like a drug and surrendered to him. Sealing the distance between us, my chest collided with his. His hands slipped under my top, found bare skin, and began working their way up my back.

I lowered my head to meet his mouth. Willingly, I lost reality and cared not to find it ever again. I tightened my legs around his waist and raised my hands to his neck, cupping his jaw to deepen the kiss. I tasted his tongue, his teasing. His hands worked up my ribs, inching toward my pounding heart, and I moaned against his mouth when his thumbs finally brushed the yearning tips of my breasts.

His mouth left mine to work its way down my throat. I slid my eyes open, arching my back as my spine came alive in a current of liquid lust. My hard nipples ached, aroused by his teasing. Skillful fingers weaved my body with threads of rippling pleasure. While his eyes held my lustful gaze, his hands found the edge of my top and slid it above my head. He twisted the material to trap my arms behind my back. He lowered his mouth to nibble at my collarbone.

His hair glowed in the blazing flames, an unruly mess of golden silk I yearned to touch, but my hands were tied behind me. I wriggled to free myself, brushing my breasts against his chest. I moaned in agony and frustration. Spasms of thick, electric pleasure built inside the hard tips of my breasts and shot through my chest, down to my navel, lapped at it, and, with renewed strength, worked through my belly to rush between my legs.

Gabe chuckled softly at my struggles and carefully lowered me onto the rug as I tugged to free my trapped arms. He knelt at my feet and peeled away my pajama bottoms, smiling at the sight of my black lace panties.

I struggled with my trapped elbows trying to set myself free, but he shook his head and stretched his body along mine.

I looked at him. "Free me, Gabe-"

He propped his head on his left elbow and hushed me with a finger on my mouth, his eyes about to unleash a storm.

I couldn't resist and provoked the gods. I wetted my lips with the tip of my tongue and licked his silencing finger. I opened my lips a bit more and used my teeth to bite, slowly wetting his fingertip with deliberate, light strokes.

Gabe tensed. His eyes shifted to a darker shade of craving. His leg worked its way between mine, suddenly weighing me down. He dropped his head, replacing his wet finger with his eager lips, distracting me from his hand slowly sliding down my throat. His hand made silent love to my breasts, lightly traced my navel, and inched lower. Against my mouth, his tongue flickered, explored, sucked, demanding my undivided attention until I felt his finger slide under my lacy panties, dipping right into my own melting core.

At one single, confident stroke, my head jerked. I bit my lips hard to stifle a scream.

My body twisted like burning wire beneath his intimate strokes. I dug my trapped fingers into the rug, losing all sense of reality.

Slow and light at first, his touch intensified. Unhurriedly rubbing my sensitive fold, he brought me toward the aching edge of climax, only to stop instants before rapture became madness. Need ripened between my taut hips. My arms ached behind my back, and my voice swallowed pleading words he could read as easily in my unfocused, liquid eyes. Oh! Dio mio! What kind of torture was this?

My eyes dropped to his now still hand disappearing under my black panties. The visual image alone of his strong fingers cupping between my legs threw me into another yearning frenzy. I raised my hips to encourage his touch, to demand it. He held still, looking at my face. I held his gaze, licked my lips, and pushed up against his fingers.

Two can play this game.

Or so I wrongly thought.

He drove me crazy with yearning, holding still against my thrusting hips, allowing me to control intensity yet delaying my release. My breath raced, my heart wanted to explode.

Finally, he slowly resumed the stroking to meet my quickening rhythm. His fingers wet, coated with my sexual essence, dipped even deeper, searching for that secret spot ... and found it. I felt his left arm slide beneath my neck to support my head just before I crashed against the last wave of surging pleasure. Exploding in a rush of ecstasy behind my trembling eyelids, I whispered his name.

*

He reached over to free my arms. His solid chest brushed my pounding heart, and he released me.

I rubbed stiffness off my wrists while Gabe grabbed some pillows from the sofa and looked at me, adjusting a pillow behind my head. "Are your arms OK?" He brushed a wandering lock of hair off my moist forehead.

It took me a second to cast myself out there to find my voice. I nodded. "Yes," I managed to whisper.

He knelt by my legs. With one questioning look he placed his hands on my hips, awaiting permission. I held no resistance. I looked at him, wordlessly lifting my hips.

He cracked a sensuous grin that held forbidden promises. "You're absolutely stunning, Porzia." Hunger, passion, and tenderness deepened his voice. "I don't want to do anything that you might have second thoughts about," he whispered, caressing my legs, pulling my panties down.

I raised myself on my elbows and looked at him, my love spilling out, reaching. Beautiful, incredibly beautiful. Surreal. "Do you want me?" I curled a finger over the elastic band of his shorts.

"More than life itself, luv," he answered, covering my hand with his.

"I want you too." So badly I couldn't think straight.

I helped him slide off his shorts and leaned back against the soft rug, adjusting my head on the pillow. I parted my legs to welcome him.

His breath brushed against my skin, his eyes ate me up, his scorching fingers branded my thighs when he lifted me up to meet him. The moment swept me off into a delirious, delicious spiraling of senses. I felt him ready, hard against my soft moistness.

He entered me, inch by inch, stretching me, filling me up, until my yearning became intense heat. Pulsing pleasure soared us to where nothing else mattered but fulfillment. Physical boundaries vanished. Our tangled bodies throbbed in unison, releasing an intensely intoxicating scent. It coated us in a sexual aura that fed us with each breath, each pang of pleasure that drummed out of us.

Wanting more, I raised my hands up to his neck and brought him down to me. I wanted to kiss him.

He held his head just inches away from my mouth, slowly sliding out of me, slowly thrusting back in, teasing me. I drowned in a pool of thick, undiluted lust.

He kept up his teasing rhythm, his mouth lingering over mine, his eyes intent on capturing every shade of pleasure my face reflected, feeding off the ecstasy he himself was conjuring.

I was soon ready to burst. "Please-" I begged, wrapping my legs around his, throwing my head back in total surrender.

He felt my hips tense against the built up reef, a helpless sea creature crashing with the surging tide. He lowered his mouth to mine, cupping my buttocks with his strong hands. With a few everlasting, hard strokes he drove us both over the edge, spilling release like scorching lava. Intense pleasure radiated from within, supporting our fall until he finally collapsed on me, heart against heart, still kissing me, still holding me.

We lay there, our glowing, entwined bodies warmer than the fire's embers. The soothing rhythm of our slowing heartbeats gently lulled us back to this side of life, a warm breeze supporting a dancing, descending feather.

*

I must have fallen asleep in Gabe's arms, for only vaguely did I remember him carrying me into the bedroom.

I woke up in his bed to my last morning with him. Our lovemaking lingered, still-wet tempera tenderly painted across my aching body. The memory of my intense pleasure churned in my stomach, wrestling with the rising dread of my imminent departure.

Merda! Talk about sweet and sour. I didn't want this to end so soon. I opened my eyes and took a second to adjust to the outside brightness invading the room. The insensible day sang loudly, sunny and bright, oblivious to my despair and miserable mood. I wished for a slingshot to deflate the sun to my sullen, gloomy level, to drag humankind down with me. I looked at Gabe asleep next to me and traded the slingshot for a Patriot missile. My sense of helpless rage rose dangerously the more I thought about the unfairness of the situation.

He looked so incredibly handsome wrapped in the safe embrace of sleep. Some people look more vulnerable when asleep. Gabe didn't. He still retained that strong masculine energy that so attracted me to him, as if even in his sleep the gods respected and acknowledged him as kin.

I wondered about his scarred back. How long did he take to heal? Were there more scars? The invisible ones were the ones I worried about. I had the feeling that just like mine, his healing wasn't quite over yet, and at the same time, a thin thread-a life connection-kept him in touch with whoever or whatever energies were responsible for saving his life. I could feel it threading just beneath his skin, like crystal water rippling through a rocky riverbed, following its course from source to ocean.

*

My plane left in the early evening, so I still had some time to share with him, and I resolved to make the best of it. Carelessly throwing all caution to the wind, I reached over and gently shook him, whispering in his ear a naughty request.

He stirred in his sleep, responding to my soothing voice. He stretched his arms above his head and smiled.

"I don't know about that," he mumbled, still half asleep.

"You mean I have to be more persuasive?" I asked, nuzzling his earlobe with my nose. I began to kiss him and moved my body on top of him. "Is this better?" I reached above his head to stroke his arms with my hands.

"We're getting there," he said. He blinked his sleepy eyes open to look at me. "What all did you have in mind?" His honeyed eyes told me that no matter what I thought of doing, he would be more than willing to agree to it.

"Uh-nothing. Just wanted to give you a quick good morning." I kissed his forehead and pretended to slide off him.

He quickly trapped my feet with his and sprang his arms to grab my wrists. "Tease."

I squirmed a bit trying to free myself and managed to arouse him even more.

"That's only going to aggravate the situation," he said.

A small dark place in me stirred alive, quite pleased. I found myself slowing down. I shifted my moves to a more seductive and insistent pulse to let him know I had every intention of finishing what I had begun. I used my hips and lower back to adjust myself in response to his swelling and braced myself against his chest.

He let go of my wrists, and his hands found my hips, guiding. His fingers sank in the curve of my butt, opening me up.

I plunged. I was more than ready and yet the impact of my aching, moist tenderness against his hardness stunned me. I crossed that line that marries pleasure to pain and cried out, bowing my back as he pierced his entire length deep inside me in one hard, agonizing thrust. He held me tight, giving me a chance to find my breath.

Like a surging tide, wet and foamy, my sexual impulse awakened, stirred, spread.

Slowly, I moved.

Physical craving manifested from age-old instinct. My senses burned, fueled by hunger and the advantageous position of being on top. I leaned in, flexing my inner muscles tight around his entire swollen length and sought sheer friction as I slid up and down, lingering on the edge of its larger tip. I swept my hips in a circular move and pushed back down, pulling him along, my pace quickened under the hastening pressure of his hands guiding my hips until blind raging bliss flared.

The initial pain faded, erased by the strong, magic strokes of our lovemaking. Pleasure thickened from a tiny flame flickering deep inside me to an enraged fire that consumed my whole body. It exploded, ricocheting madly against my skin from the inside out. With a sharp intake of breath, Gabe responded to my aggressive attentions. No longer capable of holding back, he shot me a sensuous look that flared pleasure through me instantaneously. Rising, rising, rising, the plunging rhythm of flesh against flesh exploded into a ferocious crescendo of excruciating pleasure, finally liberating us.

*

He rolled over and I stretched along his body. A single heartbeat drummed against our heaving chests. We lay quietly enjoying our fluffed-up auras until rigor mortis almost set in, and our stiffened limbs begged for mercy.

"I'd offer to cook you breakfast but I believe it's about lunch time," Gabe said.

"It's that late already?" I asked, looking around his bedroom for a clock.

"No, I was exaggerating." He watched me for a few minutes as if trying to memorize my features.

I held his gaze.

"Porzia, I don't know what's going to happen with this-," he began, combing a hand through his hair. His words held the hesitation of a newborn wave lapping at foreign shores for the very first time. "But I mean it when I call you 'luv.' This has all the roight signs to be the real thing." He looked at me. His soul spilled through dark lashes.

My heart skipped and made a run for my throat. I swallowed and pulled the sheet up my chest. I tried to smile, drowning shamelessly against surging tears.

"Gabe, I know-I feel it too." Forgetting all about the fact I had just tried to cover myself, I sat up to hug him tightly. The tears in my eyes made him a dreamy vision of liquid blue and gold, but the solid strength of his body told me he was real-painfully real.

"I know this is fast, and we don't have much time," he whispered in my ear, "but if you do have any time off soon, I want you to know that you need to get back here." He pulled back to see my eyes.

I bit the inside of my lip. I nodded, blinking tears away.

"You're absolutely adorable, Porzia." He wiped my tears away. "I'm my own boss, and as soon as I straighten a couple of things out, I'm coming over to see you in Florida. That is, if you want me to." He grinned, confident.

Delight burst through me. I smiled idiotically.

"How long is it going to take you to sort those things?" I asked, rubbing my nose with the back of my hand in an extremely unladylike manner.

"I'm not quite sure; no longer than a month, I guess."

"I'll work it out so I'll have time off to spend with you," I said, already making mental plans to shift a couple of imminent projects.

"Great. Then it's settled. I don't know how you feel about a long distance relationship, luv, but I'm diving into this head first." He caressed my cheek with the back of a bent finger.

I rubbed my face against his strong palm and inhaled the night just passed lingering on his skin. "I'm diving with you, Gabe." I planted a light kiss on his open palm.

We ended up sharing the shower, skipped breakfast, and worked toward an early lunch.

Why was I so concerned with food anyway? I wondered, once finally out of the bathroom. With hair wrapped in a thick towel, I rummaged through my luggage for fresh clothes to wear on the plane and involuntarily dropped the dice again. One and one: Two. Once more.

Interesting. I shrugged off the coincidence and a short-lived pang of discomfort and concentrated on my wardrobe. Flying back to summer, layers were in order. I set my sneakers aside, along with jeans, a short-sleeved shirt, and a periwinkle sweater. Gabe was still in the bathroom and didn't emerge until I had just finished getting dressed. I was tying my shoes when my towel decided to unwrap itself from my bent head. I was left sitting on the side of the bed, elbows resting on my bent knees, glancing at a very naked Gabe from beneath the thick, safe curtain of my wet, tangled hair.

He looked like something Atlantis might have left behind before sinking away forever beneath the waves, breathing proof that the gods still walked among us. Confident and strong, he moved about the room with the weightless grace and latent energy of a predator. He moved without hurry, as if air turned into clouds closer to his body, surrounding him. His body glistened with myriad drops of water.

The thought of kissing him dry, slowly, taking my time, became a yearning. I sighed; if only we had such time. His hair, still wet, was combed back carelessly in thick, sun-kissed wheat strands. In the back of my throat, I could taste his heat pulsing beneath the lingering fragrance of his shower soap. The sight of him getting dressed became my present focus. Black boxers went up, riding along his strong legs, followed by a pair of faded jeans that had seen better days and a black T-shirt I recognized as the one he wore on the plane when we met. He kept his feet bare.

"Hungry?" His voice startled me back to reality.

"Starving." I pushed my hair away from my face, combing it with my fingers. I tucked the dice in one of the suitcase's internal pockets, clicked the suitcase shut, and gave him a dazzling smile.

"Let's go see what we can come up with." He extended a hand to help me off the bed.

*

"Would you like some coffee?" I asked, hoping he would, knowing I did.

"Sure," his voice answered from inside the fridge.

He handed me a chilled coffee can, and I got busy setting up the coffee pot.

We quickly found bread, smoked salmon, eggs, tomatoes, and a ripened cantaloupe which I sliced and drizzled with lemon juice.

Gabe turned the radio on as I made a fluffy omelet. We soon sat to enjoy a nice brunch, good music, and each other's company.

"You mentioned a dog named Tess the other night when you told me the Dhamala story. She's in the photo with you and the eagle?" Saying the eagle's name gave me chills. I felt as if I was summoning her presence.

"Yes. Clark has Tess now at his place. I left her there when I went to Los Angeles. They get along, and he likes the company."

"He's alone?"

"Yes. Never remarried nor is he thinking about it."

"Still loves your mom?"

Gabe nodded. "He's come to terms with her death but doesn't seem to be keen on the idea of another woman by his side."

"And you?"

He shot me a quick glance, then focused on his mug. "You make outstanding coffee."

"Thanks."

"It doesn't taste like this when I make it."

"Do you usually have coffee in the mornings?"

"Yes. And toast. Sometimes eggs."

"Do you usually shower before going to bed or in the mornings?" I asked.

"Strange question. Why is it important?"

"I just want to know so I can imagine you once I'm home." I tried not to sound too sad.

"I do both but prefer the evening shower, usually. After having worked on a car at the shop all day."

"Do you ever take baths?"

"No." He smiled. "But we can change that if you'll take one with me-" He stopped as if he had just remembered something. "I take that back. I end up taking a bath every time I wash Tess." He smirked.

"I'm going to miss you," I confessed, looking up at him, riding on the tail of his lingering crooked grin.

He reached over the table to take my hand in his. "This was sort of unexpected."

"Tell me about it," I agreed, squeezing his hand.

"Even more precious because of it."

"How long a drive is it to get to the airport from here?" I asked.

"About half an hour." He pushed himself up.

"That doesn't leave us much time," I said, getting up myself.

He walked around the table to take me in his arms. I returned his embrace and leaned my head against his chest.

"Is there is anything you need to do before going back?" he asked.

"As a matter of fact, I need to stop by a florist and send some flowers to the Jourdains."

"We can do that on our way to the airport. Anything else?"

I took a deep breath and locked eyes with him. "I'd like to stop time and slowly enjoy every still second with you. I'd like to forget all about out there and allow only your arms around me to matter. I'd like to start over and re-live every delicious moment I've had the pleasure to share with you so far, from the way your hair feels through my fingers down to the tip of your toes wiggling against mine in bed."

That stole a smile from him.

"And only the fact that I know the future will bring me even more intense pleasure gives me the strength to go ahead and allow time to move as it ought to."

There, I said it! Spelled, like a true sorceress. Laced with only the purest of my intentions. I cast my wish out there, aware that by merely wishing, it would manifest. Was that the true power of magic? To shed all fears, to ride the power of pure love uncontaminated by obstacles we create?

"That's it! You're not going anywhere." He lowered his mouth to mine and kissed me ever so tenderly. I melted in his arms, as if becoming part of him would take care of all our troubles.

And so it was that time answered my plea, and what little we had of it lasted for what seemed like forever, and we had time to talk, make plans for the future, and even laugh as we held each other until it was time for me to go.

The drive to the airport and the stop at the flower shop were quiet, weighted by my imminent departure. And yet, a strong undercurrent-a certainty that all would be fine-kept us from drowning in sorrow.

How strangely the mind works when, in desperate situations, we make a point of focusing and remembering the simplest and least important details. I will remember forever the fact that the airport's waiting area was almost empty.

I turned to look at Gabe and opened my mouth to attempt a good-bye. I closed my mouth and swallowed my heart in a hard lump.

Gabe didn't look as though he was faring any better. He actually had a pair of sunglasses perched up high on his head. I knew he was going to wear them on his way out. His eyes were already fighting a red rim that reminded me of what happens to the moon when a cold front approaches.

I tried to smile. I looked up at him and rose on my tiptoes, resting my hands on his strong chest. "You were wearing this shirt on the plane," I said against his mouth.

His strong arms wrapped around my waist, and his mouth brushed mine. "Yes, I was."

Oddio, I was gonna miss his arms. "You were looking out the window when I sat down next to you. I couldn't wait for you to turn so I could see your face," I whispered.

"I had you there for a moment. When I asked you to hold my hand."

"Yes, you did." I smiled, thinking about how now it sounded so unusual. "I believed you for a second or two."

"When you looked at me with those bright eyes of yours and shook my hand, I didn't want to let go," he said in a breath that sent shivers down my spine. "Then you gave me a rainbow and made me laugh. I felt totally spellbound. You fed me and let me hold you as we slept. Once we landed, I wanted to take you straight home. It was hard to see you go then." He took a deep breath. "It's harder to see you go now." He exhaled, but his grip tightened at my waist. "But I'll see you soon, and we'll have plenty of time to make more memories."

His words went straight to my heart. Carefully, I wrapped them with the strength of my love to cherish for the rest of my days.