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el vasallo de la luna roja y el misterio de sluberts

Fantasía
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What is el vasallo de la luna roja y el misterio de sluberts

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en el pasado entre magia y traiciones slibert un chico de secundaria muere por alguien de su infancia en medio de su agonía se encuentra a fattyma una chica con varios misterios sin el y nadie saber el sobrevive y despierta como si nada hubiera pasado el empieza a notar que su Maná inestable empieza a controlarse empezando una nueva oportunidad para el

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Kdog7003 · Fantasy
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sigmet
sigmetLv1sigmet

pues primero el capitulo prologo estaba entre bien pero el capítulo 1 ya se ve un avance ya distinto de la historia y el capítulo 1 nuevo vasallo esta mejor la escritura la debes mejorar mas pero sigue asi

Carlost
CarlostLv1Carlost

los personajes no digo mucho ya que en el capítulo 1 no describen bien los personajes pero capitulo 1 tiene mejor avance ya que hasta describe parte de la naturaleza del mundo que están los personajes

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