'Ur A Wizard Jake

Jake Smith, now Gremory, slowly opened his eyes, squinting against the bright light that flooded the room. Blinking rapidly, he tried to gather his thoughts and make sense of his surroundings. As his vision adjusted, he realized he was lying on a white bed in a place he had never seen before. The room had a slightly medieval feel to it, with stone walls and tall, narrow windows. Confusion swept over him as he wondered how he had ended up here.

Pushing himself up into a sitting position, Jake noticed a middle-aged woman with a stern expression bustling around the room, tending to a few other patients. She wore a crisp white uniform and a pointed hat, which reminded him of the witches he had seen in cartoons.

"Excuse me," Jake called out, his voice still groggy from his recent unconsciousness. "Where am I? What happened?"

The woman turned to face him, her eyes scanning him with a mixture of concern and curiosity. "Ah, you're awake," she said in a brisk tone. "You're at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. I am Madam Pomfrey, the school's medi-witch. Hagrid found you in the Forbidden Forest. You were suffering from severe magical exhaustion young man."

"Hogwarts?" Jake repeated, his brow furrowing in confusion. "What's Hogwarts? And the Forbidden Forest? I don't understand. I've never heard of that."

Madam Pomfrey paused for a moment, studying Jake intently. "You mean to say you have no knowledge of the magical world at all?" she asked, her voice tinged with surprise.

Jake shook his head. "No, I've never even heard of magic before today." He chose his next words carefully." I... I had a… magical accident I guess, and I guess something went wrong."

A small smile played at the corner of Madam Pomfrey's lips. "Magic can be a tricky business, especially for those who are new to it. Strange you've never known about magic before today though, but who am I to say what goes on for magical education across the pond. Judging by your accent I'd wager you're from America?" She asked. Jake nodded.

"Well either way I'd suggest you talk to the Headmaster. Maybe he can see about getting you some form of a magical education. He's out of the castle on errands right now, but he'll be back later. Why don't you rest for now," she said.

Jake nodded and laid back in his infirmary bed as Madam Pompfrey went to check on another patient. As he lay there, he contemplated the random day he'd had so far. His completely ordinary and mundane Sunday ended up changing his life forever. He was apparently not only part devil, but also a descendant of King Solomon. Also he had magical powers, which was pretty cool! Maybe he could be a superhero back home? Jake inwardly laughed at that thought.

But how did he end up in England of all places? Did he teleport? Did he even know how to teleport? He literally just found out about magic today, or was it yesterday? He didn't really know how long he'd been knocked out. As he was pondering that Madam Pompfrey came back around towards him. "Excuse me Madam, is there a newspaper for today I could read."

"Sure thing honey." With a flick of her wand a newspaper from across the room levitated all the way over to her. She handed it to him. Jake paused for a second just staring in awe at that trivial display of real life magic. Not wanting to seem anymore like non-magically educated bumpkin, he shook his head and snapped himself out of it.

"Thank you." Jacob took the newspaper and checked the date to see how long he'd been knocked out. "Let's see today is Oc-October 30th 1994!?" He was shocked at that! The month and day were seemingly correct, but the date was literally decades in the past! Did he time travel!? Did he die and Isekai!? What the hell was going on!?

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Albus Dumbledore had received a notification that a teenage American wizard had accidentally teleported himself to the forbidden forest. Unsurprisingly, this was the least of his worries on such a busy day. Sometimes he really questioned his decision to take on three full-time jobs, but then reminded himself that it was necessary to prevent the wizarding world from collapsing.

Many wizards and witches were overly arrogant about their magical abilities, but in reality, they were insignificant compared to the wider world. Most adult wizards were classified as "Low Class" in terms of power, with only a few reaching the "mid-class" level like himself and… Voldemort.

Albus thought aloud, "If only those purebloods knew that there were factions out there with literal children who far surpassed their precious dark lord in power... maybe it would humble them." Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, the wizarding world had never gone to war with any faction other than themselves. Their numerous civil wars, however, had only resulted in a further decline in their already dwindling numbers, which saddened Albus whenever he contemplated it.

After his moment of thought, Albus entered the Infirmary and caught sight of the boy he was looking for. He momentarily froze when he noticed the striking resemblance between the boy and the scariest being he had ever encountered—Lucifer, the Devil himself. Of course, it was not the real Lucifer but his current replacement. The boy possessed the same bright red hair, blue eyes, and supernatural handsomeness. Albus discreetly observed the boy using his Mage sight from a distance, realizing that he was only half devil. Albus couldn't determine if that was a good thing or not, as half devils were known to be extremely powerful in the Wider World, wielding both devil magic and human magic with great potency. On top of that they could even possess sacred gears naturally!

Approaching the boy, who was engrossed in reading a newspaper. He greeted the boy, "Hello there. My name is Albus Dumbledore, and welcome to Hogwarts. I happen to be the Headmaster of this school, and it seems you've found yourself quite far from home." Albus introduced himself to Jake.

Jake, having finished his momentary freak out about the incorrect date on the paper, set it down and looked up at the old wizard who was addressing him. He realized this was the head honcho of the school, fitting the stereotypical appearance with his eccentric wizard robes. "Oh, hey! How's it going? Yeah, I'm definitely far from home," Jake replied.

"I heard you're from America," Albus said. "It's quite impressive that you were able to teleport all the way across the Pacific Ocean. But I suppose with your lineage, you certainly possess the magical aptitude to accomplish such a feat." Albus subtly probed, trying to confirm if Jake belonged to the Gremory family.

Jake sighed and scratched the back of his head. "Actually, I'm not exactly sure how I ended up here in England," he admitted, to which Albus jokingly corrected, "Scotland, actually." Albus also noticed how Jake didn't want to respond to the lineage comment. He'd get him to confirm his thoughts at the very least.

"Either way," Jake continued, "I'm not entirely sure what happened. Truth be told, I didn't even know magic existed until today. Then some weird guys did some strange stuff to me, and bam, next thing I know, I'm in Scotland, apparently." He chose not to mention the time travel aspect, considering it was a detail he needed to figure out on his own. Moreover, he knew better than to trust someone he had just met a minute ago.

Albus was genuinely surprised by Jake's statement, considering he had reached this age without any knowledge of magic. However, Albus supposed that he had witnessed stranger things in his lifetime, such as an immortal dark lord who continuously evaded death. Putting aside his surprise, Albus inquired, "Well, do you at least know about your family?"

Jake let out another sigh as he ran his hand through his now red hair, which had magically transformed along with his sudden handsomeness. Glancing at a nearby mirror and noticing his blue eyes, Jake shrugged off his changed appearance. "Yeah, before the group did whatever they did to teleport me, they mentioned that my father was someone called Z-something Gremory. The name was long and sounded stupid, so I didn't pay much attention. But I definitely caught the last name," Jake explained.

Albus nodded with a serene smile on his face, but internally, he was taken aback. It wasn't that he didn't suspect Jake to be a Gremory, but the realization that he was apparently the half-brother of the Devil Himself made Albus keenly aware that he needed to be on his best behavior around him. Reading Jake's mind with Legilimency, a practice he often employed with other students, was absolutely out of the question! If Jake's brother ever found out, it could mean certain death for Albus!

"Well, magical accidents happen to the best of us," Albus said, attempting to ease the tension. "If you'd like, I can arrange for a Portkey to send you back to America." Albus wasn't particularly thrilled about having the brother of the Devil lingering in his school for longer than necessary. He hoped to handle the situation promptly and courteously, so he could send Jake on his way.

Jake, unfamiliar with the term "Portkey," speculated that it might be a magical term related to teleportation. Learning that he was in a magic school and that there were other students his age, aside from the time travel aspect, caused Jake to reconsider his plans. He had always felt destined for something more, and now that the opportunity was right in front of him, he decided to embrace it.

"Well, actually," Jake began, "since this is a magical school, and I don't know much about magic or anything for that matter, I was wondering if I could study here for a while and learn some." He looked at the old man, hoping for a positive response.

Albus cursed internally. He couldn't possibly deny Jake's request. Reluctantly, he put on a fake, happy smile and replied, "Of course, my boy! Hogwarts is always open to students who wish to learn. And since you are a half-human, you are more than welcome to study here. Welcome to the school!"

Jake beamed with excitement. Learning magic sounded absolutely fantastic, and the prospect of not having to return to his mediocre foster home in Philly made it even better. Plus Jake was apparently 20ish years in the past so his foster home probably didn't even exist yet. "That's awesome!" he exclaimed. "So, what do I need to do, sir?"

Albus chuckled, relieved that the brother of the Devil wouldn't end up in Slytherin, which could have caused a myriad of problems. "Normally, most students require a wand to use our magic," Albus explained. "But due to your lineage, you won't need one. That's taken care of. We can have your school robes delivered by tomorrow, so that's no problem either. The only thing we need to decide is your house affiliation. Normally, our Sorting Hat determines that, but I think you can choose whichever house you prefer." Albus elaborated, "The four houses are Slytherin, Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, and Ravenclaw."

Jake thought those names sounded kind of silly but maybe it was a British thing who knows. "So what's the deal with the four houses? What do they stand for?" Jake asked. He wanted to know more about them to find out which one he best fit in.

Albus actually chuckled at that question and he had a fun way to answer. "Well it's been said sometimes in American terms that the Slytherin house would be what is known as the goth kids. Gryffindor would be the jocks. Ravenclaw are the Nerds, and Hufflepuff is just pretty much everyone else!" Albus always loved explaining it like that, plus it always pissed off Snape when he referred to Slither in his goths! It's not his fault they spent all day being dark and broody in the dungeons…

Jake considered the descriptions for a moment. He quickly realized that the goth kids in Slytherin House wouldn't be his fit, and he didn't identify as a nerd either. Being labeled as "everyone else" in Hufflepuff didn't appeal to him either. As a part time boxer he qualified as an athlete. So, he decided that he would align himself with the jocks in Gryffindor. "I suppose I'll join Gryffindor then, sir," Jake announced confidently.

Albus nodded, content with Jake's decision. At least the brother of the Devil wouldn't end up causing trouble in Slytherin House. That could have created a host of complications. He assured Jake that everything would be taken care of by tomorrow. With a sigh of relief, Albus left the infirmary, granting Jake the freedom to explore the castle. He also mentioned that the school was currently hosting two other schools for an ongoing tournament, but that Jake needn't worry about it for the moment.

Little did Albus know that his statement about not worrying would prove to be quite inaccurate...