1 The Transfer

"Imma just go to sleep, it's too late..." I declare to myself, as I close my laptop and set it on my nightstand.

I sigh as I pull my sheets over myself, in blissful ignorance of what was to come.

---

"I feel surprisingly well rested." I state "But where the fuck am I?"

I look in all directions, but the only things I can see are an endless darkness, and random bright lights, flickering around me.

Yep.

I've read enough stories to quickly realize I'm not dreaming, and I am simply dead. While this may seem like a rash decision to believe I am dead so easily, it was quickly confirmed by the void itself.

"Welcome souls. Read the instructions in your manual to get started on your reincarnation.'"

'Lucky me! I actually get to know what the fuck is going on! Let's get reading, shall we?'

[Welcome Human Soul! You have been chosen along with every other member of your species to reincarnate into a world blessed by magic. Although you need to get set up before you get to the fun part!]

I froze.

'Every member, which means 7 billion people... In a fucking fantasy world... without modern agriculture, medicine, and society.'

...

'We're all fucked.'

[First off, you want to customize your new body, don't worry, you don't have to grow up all over again, instead, we will reincarnate you as your prime form!]

'Pretty nice, carry on'

[The customizer works by spending "points," these can be used for many different things, but I'll leave you to discover it for yourself!]

---

Turns out, the customizer was pretty simple. Looking at it in front of me, I could mentally change features. There's also a function to import your previous body to save points, which I chose to do. I am still in good shape, I had good looks, and "very superior intelligence." There was almost nothing to change about myself to make myself better, until I found an option practically buried beneath all the other random skills you could choose.

[Magic Proficiency]

[5 points to upgrade]

'That settles it. Dumping all my points into magic.'

[Magic Proficiency]

[Out of Points]

It didn't have any levels or anything, so I couldn't have some sort of number to tell me how good I was. But to me, just having magic would raise my survival chances by a shit ton.

I still had 4 more points, so I dumped it on 2 quality of life choices like making my skin clearer, and making my jaw a bit more pronounced.

[Good work! Now select where in the world you want to spawn.]

The manual then showed a very detailed map of this new world I was going to. It was like some billion pixel screen, except I could SEE each individual detail across the entire surface. Though I could only focus on a small area at a time.

'From what I know about people, most are probably going to spawn along rivers, plains, and other mild areas.'

'Which means stay the fuck away from there...'

In the end, I decided to set my spawn as a forest in a random valley up in god knows where, away from everyone else.

I should probably be fine isolated, considering that I might be an expert at talking to myself, only beaten by the likes of philosophers, professional athletes, and the horrified souls coping with the memories of two girls one cup.

I talk to myself so much I have formed a bond with my own thoughts, turning me into a narcissist.

I'd rather be a narcissist than lacking self worth, in my opinion. (Which is always correct)

Back to the topic at hand, it seems the manual has crumpled into little pieces, then dematerialized in thin air.

I suppose not everyone is done yet...

'Guess I'll wait.'

---

"Now that all of you are finished preparing, it is time to go."

With those words, I lost consciousness.