19 Blue. The Childhood Blue. (01)

Blue.

All that was left for Beth was this blue now.

The river water was like a heavy blanket that blocked the sunlight away, only leaving a dark, blue hole that kept drifting and plummeting. The sinking water swirled around Beth's wrist as she held onto Julianna tightly, grabbing her by her hoodie. Beth tried to swim against the current, yet she couldn't handle the carrying the weight of Julianna. As she kicked forward, the current pushed further against her like an elastic invisible barrier, waiting for her to be devoured by the blue.

Without air, Beth felt her lungs scorching. Her numbing heartbeat was responding to the pulse of the water. With her eyelids half-closed, she saw a figure appeared faintly in the dark, swimming towards her and Julianna quickly.

It was the redhead. A wave of water pushed towards Beth as the redhead took her by the arm and carried the both of them towards. It was a strong, unsteady pull, yet Julianna still seemed unconscious. Out of fear that Julianna might accidentally slip away from Beth and vanish into the blue, Beth grasped onto her more to protect her.

The only flicker of light now came from Julianna's leaf necklace, which emitted a little green glow underwater.

Everything else was blue.

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Beth has remembered the blue well. It is a color that was deeply coded in her memories from childhood. The cloudless azure sky with birds soaring freely that always invited so many daydreams. The bright cobalt blue stained glass from the local churches. The little indigo flowers gently resting on the windows, waiting for the caress from the sunlight. The sparkly icicles dangling under the sky or on the translucent leaves. The light blue from the long uniform dresses girls wore to school. The clear summer lakes. The old oil pigments found in vintage bookstores.

Living in a small town in the countryside, Beth had always been in touch with nature. Her home was located near the forest, which made it convenient for her to have fun in the woods with her friends. When she was eight, the forest was a source of fun every day after she had school. Kids from the class formed into groups to have mini adventures, playing hide-and-seek among the woods. In winter, the snow painted everything in white, leaving dabs of white highlights on the pine twigs. The lakes in the forest became frozen as well, becoming the perfect ground for ice skating. Each day swamps of kids would cover themselves up with layers of sweaters and coats, and raid the ice like puffy drumrolls.

It was a time which everything still had a rose-tinted mist attached to them.

A scene from her memory appeared in her mind as if she had returned to her eight-year-old self.

In day school, she had a group of friends who frequented the forest. Among the group of friends, two girls were the closest to her--Gina and Margot. Margot came from a nearby farm, which her parents managed. She had a rebellious streak and often spoke like a young boy. Gina was different. She had long hair and a clean pixie cut. Her gentle words acted as a buffer between Margot's crude jokes and Beth's absentmindedness.

Whenever Beth got bored doing her homework. She would start scribbling in a piece of paper by the window waiting for Margot and Gina, with an art book by her side. Where are Maggie and Gina now? I can't wait to share all the fun stuff I saw today with them!

Madison was just finishing up sewing a ribbon and laces onto the chest of an old red dress of Beth to make it prettier. She knew that Beth had been reading art magazines with fashion photos, yet she could not afford the clothing exhibited in the pages. Seeing Beth scribbling by herself, Madison picked up her dress, walked towards her, and braided her hair into twin pigtails.

'I love this hairstyle, mom!'

Madison smiled. Then, she grabbed the finished dress and handed it to Beth. 'Here it goes, sweetie! Try it on!'

'This dress is so cute! Thank you so much, mom!'

Though the dress could not even compare to those dresses that the magazine had depicted, Beth loved it very much.

Soon, Gina and Margot appeared at her door.

'Hey, Maggie and Gina! Look at my new hairstyle today! Don't I look like a little princess today?'

Margot laughed. She pointed to Beth's ribbon on her dress with a wicked smile. 'Well then, shall I be the queen?'

'I can be the little sister if that's the case!' Gina smiled sweetly.

'That's great! We will definitely be a happy family together! Let me see...one day we can go on adventures together and own a giant castle. We shall even create our own kingdom!'

'I am not quite sure about that!' Margot did not forget to poke fun at Beth's absentmindedness as if she were a sheltered little girl. 'Real adventures are much more dangerous than that. People have been saying that there were dangerous fish in the lake when you pass the forest in the night...I bet you don't know that!'

'Don't tease me, Maggie! Don't tell me the fish thing is true...I am already getting a nightmare for the day!'

Margot blew a hard sneeze and tried hard to control herself not to laugh at Beth's surprised and slightly anxious face.

'The fish won't eat you, Beth. You are a cinnamon roll for us; the fish will take that into account, hehe.' Gina chuckled along with the two girls as well.

The shades from the leaves left soft, scattered lights on the serene forest path. As the three people walked together under the breezy shadows, Beth felt as if Maggie and Gina were just like two sisters of her, who grew up with her together.

'To be honest, I just had a thought. I hope that I had magic.' Beth picked up a pink flower by the bush aside and stuck it under Gina's hair.

'Magic sounds super fun! What kind of magic would you like to have?' Gina shared a heartfelt gaze with her.

'Why?' Margot asked as well.

'Gin's question first: I want to have magic that could grant my wishes and let me capture all the beautiful moments in my daily life! As for the reasons, I would say...I want to explore all the interesting things in the future, and I want us to always be each other's special person!'

Unfortunately, promises were easier broken than formed.

The happy days for Beth didn't last long. After school had started, she progressed at a different pace than Margot and Gina, and other friends from the friend group, only to discover that they had already been left behind. She ultimately walked her path all alone. Finally, she got admitted into a talented program, while Margot and Gina moved on to their respective life as well.

As summer holiday ended, the time for them to say goodbye also came along.

'The summer is ending soon. My family farm needs a lot of help, and I will attend school part-time. I am not sure if I can hang out with you anymore, Beth.'

'Why? Are we not going to school together?' Beth felt dejected. I have hoped that we become lifelong friends forever…

'Beth, I know that you care about us a lot, and I really appreciate that. However, sometimes things don't turn out the way it should." Gina whispered. 'I didn't get placed in the talent program that you are in. We are going to have very different schedules; I don't know if I can make it.'

It would be much better if magic were real...wouldn't it? Why can't I even keep my friends with me?

'It's not your fault, Beth. Life does things that we don't like.'

Gina was right. Life's unpredictability taught Beth a lesson. The three people went from best friends to dearest strangers over time and rarely saw each other again.

There was even not a formal farewell.

Now, after seven years, she found herself in the same situation. What if this would be the last time that she ever saw Julianna, without even a farewell?

She couldn't take it anymore.

Jules, please don't go. I don't want to lose you like I lost Margot and Gina.

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