23 My Radiance (9)

Rather, there are bad stories that nobody has spread yet. Like, the first time he met senpai. Although he entered this sort of world after that incidence, the darkness of this side still surprised him.

When he first met senpai, Mikami understood, that he had yet to get in too thick. 'I'll show you the ropes. But you, aren't like me. You'll be able to go back, even after you learn this stuff.' was what senpai said.

It was just like he said. No matter how many girls he slept with, or the bad things he did. He never felt himself sink into the darkness too deeply. It cleared up his muddled mind. 'I want to meet Kasumi soon.'

In the beginning, Shichiro had been keeping in touch with him regarding Kasumi. However, eventually, he summed up the courage to contact him. He received a lecture as one would expect, but afterward, he said, 'Hurry and return to this crying idiots side.' When Shichiro told him that Kasumi cried herself to sleep and said his name, he felt an incredible amount of guilt and happiness.

He regretted it, what happened then. He could have chosen his words carefully and said it ambiguously. So that Kasumi would understand; that he had his circumstances. He could have done that. But, it felt as though, people watched his every move.

"Un, I know. When senpai told me to be careful around Yumeko-chan, I told him, 'Is there anyone worse than you?"

His sweatdropped. "And his reaction?"

"He seemed surprised, and at the same time, lonely. Last year, when we first met. I noticed it. Ah, this person is just like me. But, at the same time, there is something different. He's like all the countless lonely souls in this universe and me. We are all searching for something, searching for something - in any shape or form. The difference is what that something is. It could be a person, and if so. What sort of relationship do we have with them and do we want to change that relationship? From friendship to more sibling-like. From friendship to just acquaintances, from friendship to lovers. We are all searching for that something that something that will have a large impact on our lives."

... Recalling that person words, Mikami paused. 'Lila isn't as carefree and careless of a person as you think. Sometimes she's carefree and childish, but most of the time she's…'

"Then, Lila-chan. What do you think senpais something is?"Mikami asked curiously.

"Love."

Mikami almost dropped his cup, and soft laughter escaped the girl's lips. "Is it, that surprising?"

"No, not really, I think anyone can figure out that much after spending time with him."

But, he's a tad bit surprised. He didn't think she would say it.

Lila nodded before she said. "That's right, but only those who truly want to understand will find out more. Senpai told me that most people normally won't get any closer to him. Especially after hearing the rumors. But, I think of that as an unfortunate thing. After all, there is no human out there who don't want it, at least that one special person to understand them. I, want to help him. Maybe it's for my benefit since there are many things contradictory for me still. But, even so..." the girl's sentence falls short, as her gaze landed on the other side of the room.

Sure enough, following her gaze. Mikami found that it was on senpai.

"Aren't you stubborn?"

"It seems so."

"You mainly came here for this?" he asked.

Lila confirmed with a nod and, "Yes."

She said it so bluntly. But now Mikami gets it. Why she disappeared for two weeks before coming here. It was probably to strengthen her resolve. Ah, he gets it. This person is—

"But, it isn't just senpai." She turned to him with a bright smile, "Didn't you figure it out? About the song?"

"I'm surprised."

Lila laughed, "Aha, I thought so. But, I also felt it then — a connection. Though, when I brought it up to Kasumi. She got a bit jealous."

Jealous? Kasumi?

He's never seen that before. A jealous Kasumi, what would that look like? Even in the past, when all those girls were surrounding him, he never once saw her jealous. It's true from time to time she would show displeasure. But that would disappear quickly since he would run after her without fail. "Hamano-kun, are you envious?! A jealous Kasumi is very cute."

"I'm envious, of your friendship and the care she has for you."

"En were very close, and I like Kasumi a lot. But those feelings differ greatly from the ones you have for her."

"Stop, why are we suddenly talking about her?"

"No, I won't. Hamano-kun, do you, intend to run away forever? Kasumi has been waiting for you for a long time."

"I know, and that's why I proposed."

Lila shook her head.

The girl said no more, he understood why. Even if she continued this topic, he wouldn't have any answers for her. She would have to listen to his endless number of excuses and make him feel bad. This girl knows that, and that's why.

Mikami quickly changed the topic and brought up the case about the jealous girls. He informed her that she probably shouldn't return in the morning.

"But Hamano-kun, Haruka-kun always hugs me really tightly. I can't escape, even if I wanted to."

"..."

Senpai, hugged her to sleep?

So, she is that important to senpai. Well, Mikami figured that out a long time ago. It appears the serious conversation is over for now. But, since it's her, she will surely bring it up again. That's right; he's running away.

Even now, he's trying to escape. Even though, Kasumi is willing to be in his arms this time.

Back then, part of the reason he turned her down was, because Mikami noticed it. Unwillingness. No, not unwillingness. But hesitation. Whether Kasumi realized it, he couldn't un-see it. In contrast this time around, it's him with those sorts of feelings even though he proposed.

Eventually, he came back and placed the plates one by one from the tray on to the table.

"Senpai, what's this?" Lila asked curiously.

"All they had left was this. What's wrong don't like it?"

"It looks strange!"

Strange she said. Mikami watched as senpai takes his spoon and brings it towards the girl's mouth.

"Eat."

The girl's cheeks redden, she wanted to refute but upon meeting senpai's gaze. She nodded and took a bite from the spoon he extended towards her.

"Yummy!" Lila exclaimed happily.

Senpais gaze is gentle as he replied softly, "Mm, right."

Mikami coughed, in front of him? Do they realize that they are feeding him with so much PDA here?

"Mikami, I can't go with her to the shooting tomorrow. So, you take care of her."

Mikami understood his hidden words. There will be trouble in the shooting. Well, the magazine is somewhat famous. With Lila-chan's present status there will be rumors. But more importantly, the models going are probably ones senpai slept with. This guy, always gets himself involved with such a range of people.

"Senpai, you won't be with me?" Lila asked.

"I'll be a bit late. All right? I haven't forgotten our promise."

"Okay!! Then, I'll still make lunch boxes. Do you want anything in particular?"

"I don't normally eat but, I liked the hamburgers."

Lila laughed softly before she said. "Aha, like a little kid."

How nice. If he could be with Kasumi usually, surely she would do the same for him. Make him lunch, flirt. His thoughts break off when he found Lila-chan staring at him. His sweatdropped, this again?

"Hamano-kun! You're not eating vegetables!!" Lila exclaimed.

Even though this was the only food available, senpai got fruit and vegetables.

"I don't normally," Mikami stated calmly.

"But that's not healthy!" Lila scolded him while puffing her cheeks up into a pout. It made the usually cool and elegant looking girl look like a child. In contrast to the Lila-chan who was speaking with him so seriously just moments ago. What a strange girl.