1 Prologue

An Open Letter to You

If fairy tales were real, then mine would have been written by someone who wanted my life to be the most dramatic life recorded in history. Why? I am not entirely privy, but I definitely feel attacked for having experienced the kind of upheaval I did. Perhaps whoever did write the story of my life had a boring one of their own, and wanted to project their issues on me—which is totally unfair because I never wanted any of this and now my toe kinda hurts because I stubbed it a while ago and now I’m just full-on ranting and I think I need a therapist.

But really, who wouldn’t? Maybe if someone lived through the horrors of my life, they’d need it too. Or, then again, maybe I’m just being my usual whiny and annoying self with a lot of self-entitlement and grandiose that Principal Chadha insists our generation popularly exhibits.

The point is, life really isn’t a fairy tale or any of those cheesy stuff they write to make kids’ expectancy of life to be barfing glitter. And it’s wrong. Very wrong. So this is my way of telling other people to throw away everything they have thought to be true, because this is the truth. People may shoot me dead for what I am about to tell you, but I figure that any warning is helpful to whoever reads this and have plans to go to any major city in the US of A to please stay away from the tunnels down under…

…if you’re not looking for a good time *winky face*

Sincerely,

Not a crazy person.