42 Heavy.

Soojin's chest feels heavy.

As though all the life from her core has been sucked out from her.

It's like she's immobile, paralysed and absolutely numb.

She'd jump off a roof and feel absolutely nothing.

Her heart could've stopped, for all she knew.

It could've escaped her ribs and departed her body.

She felt as though her stomach was gurgling, like milk that's gone bad.

It was an odd feeling.

One she'd felt every time she sat on a swing.

The kind of sensation her stomach would be filled with as she rode higher and higher with every push.

She'd have her eyes peered shut as her father pushed her.

"Higher, Appa!" The 10 year old Soojin would squeal, the pads of her feet tingling and butterflies filling the pit of her stomach.

That's what she felt like.

Only now, she'd fallen off of the swing, right on her ass.

The impact has left her in a state of shock, all from trauma and bewilderment.

Min Yun Ki, the man who had been treating her nothing short of a lice in his hair, had grown to develop feelings for her?

The same man who'd fingered her and bit her lip the first time he summoned her in his chamber.

The same man who'd suckle on her nipples, until they turned bright red in assault.

The same man who'd forced her to surrender herself to him, sacrificing every aspect of her identity.

"W-What?" She asks, finally gaining ahold of her shocked state, wetting her throat with a big swallow.

Now, Yun Ki's confused.

Was she hard of hearing?

He'd said it thrice, already.

Was she playing coy?

He breaks into a nervous laughter.

"I-I said I like you.." He repeats, shaking her by her shoulders as he sees her eyes going blank.

Soojin pushes at his chest, untangling her body from his own.

He watches her move away from him and running desperate hands through her matted wet hair.

"I-I meant, how did this happen?" She asks of him.

She'd done nothing but repel him.

"What do you even l-like about me?"

Yun Ki feels as though she's upset about him liking her.

He was accountable for his own feelings.

"I've done nothing but spurn your advances..I've refused to give myself to you, I've talked back, I've avoided any encounters with you, to the best of my abilities and yet, you say you like me.." She explains, staring at the ground, eyes refusing to meet his.

"Why?" Soojin asks, looking up at him.

He feels as though he's out of breath.

His honesty got him into a whirlwind of questions he bore little answers to.

He thinks long and hard, gust of winds blowing between them.

"I-I.." he begins to speak yet doesn't find words adequate enough.

Soojin scoffs at his lack words.

Pathetic, she thinks.

"Soojin-ah.." He mumbles.

"I know you think I'm a monster. I know very well that you think I'm nothing more than an arrogant prick, someone who uses people solely out of his own greed.."

He's advancing towards her, pulling the strap of her blue robe back up her shoulder.

"I'd do anything to prove you wrong and you'd still see me as an absolute beast." He runs a hand past her sleeve, grabbing her hand in his.

He feels his heart thump, blood rushing to the tip of his ears, all to the apples of his cheeks.

She feels warm in his big hands.

He likes the way her small fingers could hide under a curl of his own long ones, over them.

"I like you because, you're pure. You bear no ill intentions, you bear integrity, pride and benevolence. You store so much energy in you, just staying around you keeps me away from the darkness I've allowed my heart to lurk into. Most importantly, you have a heart. One, that beats for those you care about. Wanting to be around you, basking under the positivity and radiance you exude, encourage me to venture into the depths of my heart. It allows me to realise that the man who the world has dismissed as nothing but a hard shelled monster, could have a soft core… I didn't know I had a heart that beat at an insane pace, before I held your hand or pulled you close.. I-I, being around you makes me want to be better. You're everything I'm not and yet, everything I wish to be one day."

Yun Ki concludes, squeezing Soojin's hand in his.

"I don't expect of you to love me. I know it's difficult and I know all too well, I'm difficult. I just want you to bear an open mind, an open heart towards me. I won't force you to love me, I'll wait till I've earned your affection. I'll wait till your heart beats for me, even if it takes an eternity. I just want you to give me a fair shot.. I want to show you, I can be all that you've wanted and more. J-Just take a chance on me, Soojin-ah."

He smiles a little, intertwining his hands with hers, walking her back into the palace.

Ends of their hair, their fabric dripping with water.

Squeaks of their sandals striking against the marbled flooring, echo through the hall.

The Palace corridors are lit in candles, guiding their way back.

Yun Ki leaves Soojin outside her chamber, fiddling a little in his spot.

Wondering how he must leave her after a heartfelt confession.

Soojin's clawing at the robe sticking to her chest, pulling it away from her body.

Just as she's about to look up at him, he leans in.

Yun Ki holds the back of Soojin's head, directing her face closer to his.

Soojin's eyes flutter close and hands clamp shut at the sudden advancement.

The creases on her forehead clear when she feels his soft lips touching her hairline.

It's the sound of a puckered kiss, that has her eyes opening.

He's kissing her head.

As a token of goodbye.

He pulls away, not battling an eye at her, before turning away and prodding back to his room in hasty steps.

Soojin stands at the foot of her chamber, cheeks red and eyes wide.

She feels battled.

She feels guilty.

What was this inner turmoil?

She opens the doors to her chamber, with shaky hands.

Just as she does, a flock of maidservants rush to her.

They look disastrous.

Worry-stricken, rather.

"Your Majesty, where did you go in the middle of the night? We were all so worried." They voice out, in a high pitched frenzy.

Soojin clamps hands over her ears, blocking out the complaints.

"Yah! I was out for a stroll..fresh air. The corset had sucked out all the air from my lungs.." Soojin explains, clearing the mob of women blocking her path.

She slumps on her bed, all wet and amidst the worries of the women who were tending after her.

"You'll get a cold, Queen Consort. Please change.." A woman cries.

But all Soojin can focus on now is the Red Sapphire sitting on her night table, glistening under the hue her room is coated in.