38 Guilt.
Soojin walked back to her chamber, never looking back.
After all, how could she?
She was partly to blame.
She was the reason he was crumbling like a stone on a harsh windy day and yet, she was the wind that had managed to strike the rock, not at once, rather time by time.
She was surprised.
Had she seen emotions in the eyes of the man she had always deemed to be a mastermind, reincarnation of The Devil?
It was something she couldn't digest.
Tears in the eyes of the one who'd left her tossing and turning in bed, leaving behind tear stains on her own head rest.
Was he crying? She wondered.
His voice was shaky and yet, he was a man who was engulfed whole by the God of Anger.
He'd turned into another person as he smashed his bare wrists against the concrete.
She was sure that the crack she'd heard was from his own knuckle bones, which had been splintered off.
Why was he so self-destructive?
Why had he reared so many enemies for himself when he could've had an entirely different approach?
Had she made him this way?
Was he changing and had she just further pushed him into the dark well of hopelessness.
She was partly to blame, wasn't she?
Those were the thoughts that were spiralling in her head.
Distractedly, she steps into her chamber, watching her maidservants straighten their posture and stand before her.
She bows before them and takes a seat on the floor mattress, propping herself up by bolsters, in the dimly lit scented room.
"Your Highness, won't you be changing out into your sleeping robe?" One of the main Palace woman asks her and Soojin nods.
She had things to do and most importantly, places to go.
"Queen Consort, The King had ordered these for you. They arrived whilst you were at the Banquet." One of them speaks, presenting a golden tray with a black rimmed ring that carried a red rhinestone.
The gold platter was decorated in Jasmine.
There was a letter placed on the platter, over which the ring was seated.
Soojin observes the ring in the palm of her hand and notices it is similar to the one Yun Ki wears on his ring finger.
She asks her Palace Women to excuse themselves so she can have some privacy and assures them that she shall change for bed, herself.
Just as they leave Soojin unfolds the letter.
It's written in black ink.
'Soojin,
I realise I haven't given my bride a post-wedding gift. I agree our ceremony was rather a rushed event and looking back, I haven't presented before you our betrothal ring.
Soojin, the stone you see adorning the ring is Sapphire. My reason behind choosing Sapphire has been a rather long and tedious one. Sapphire symbolises wisdom, virtue and holiness. These are the three foundations you've brought into my life. I hope this stone connects our souls in a blissful marriage, obliterating the trials and tribulations we've seen. I hope it suits your taste.
Min Yun Ki.'
Soojin feels conflicted.
He was acting strange.
Almost as though he'd turned a new leaf.
Thinking about wearing the ring brings her great discomfort.
How would she adorn her ring finger in a Sapphire bestowed upon her by her lawfully wedded husband and go to see her lover, Bohoja?
The emotion she was feeling in the realms of her heart was starting to get a name.
It was guilt.
Unforgiving guilt.
Yet, Soojin keeps aside the ring she's been presented with, wears her hair back in a braid and creeps out of her chamber to meet the man who'd been awaiting her presence.
Bohoja.
