1 Getting to the Word Count

November 5th

My English teacher said we have to write in our journals every week, so I guess this is how I'm gonna think about my life. I really hate writing. I really do. I'm just trying to get to the word count, to be honest. Nevermind, I thought about something. I really hope my teacher just skims this, because I don't need him asking about my business.

So there's this girl. I've actually liked her for a super long time. I mean, maybe. 5 years isn't that long, right? It's senior year now, so I've been liking her since 7th grade when she first got transferred into my class. If you're wondering what made me like her, the real question is: what didn't I like about her?

First off, she is the finest girl I have ever seen. And even though she isn't the nerd of our year, she ain't a dummy either. I mean, she's perfect. I'm a bit of a clown, and she's always laughing at me and my jokes. I already know the quickest way to a girl's heart is to make her laugh, so I'm pretty much her best choice.

The only problem is that there's other guys that like her too, and they're always doing extra stuff to seem like they're really that cool. And they're not. All those guys are some real stupid, fake, player types. Only thing they can talk about is what they think a girl looks like, meanwhile I bet they can't even spell curvaceous. And if they can't spell that, then that means they don't deserve my curvaceous crush - excuse me - wifey.

She's my wifey because I claimed her in the 7th grade. We were in the same classes half the time, so she must've been laughing at my jokes for years longer than any other guy at this school. I'm ahead, so it only makes sense. But somehow, she hasn't really asked for my number or anything like I thought she would. We're in our senior year. How long is she gonna wait?

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November 12th

See, this is why guys are such pieces of crap here. So me and my crush was talking in Mr. Allen's class at 5th period - cause you know he ain't teaching - and we were really vibing. I know what vibing feels like, so I definitely wasn't imagining it. I mean, she was laughing and smiling at me, saying stuff like "Boy, you crazy" and all that. You know how girls talk. So one of those douchebags I talked about before walked by and tried to talk to her. He came at her with some corny line about how cute he thinks she is, and she wasn't really feeling it. Then after she said she didn't want to go out with him, he called her ugly.

Man, he was so disrespectful! I bet he don't get taught how to treat a woman back at home like I do. She just rolled her eyes and said, "He's always like that." I listened to her rant about that idiot, and I made mental notes of how not to act. See these other guys are dumb. They need to listen to girls to know how to get them. If you notice, girls are always talking about themselves. If you pay attention enough, they'll tell you how to make them like you. Only thing you gotta do is have an attention span bigger than a corn nut.

So we kept talking, then she left when the bell rang. I told her we can talk about what else she doesn't like later, but she still didn't give me her number. I love her, but I swear she's slow sometimes. Pray for my wifey.

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November 19th

Bro, my crush played me! Why she get a boyfriend? I was just talking to her last week! She could've had my number but she was playing. And she got the nerve to get with this other guy that's in her 2nd period. He's lucky that I don't have that class, or I would've given him the stankiest stare-down.

The problem is that this guy is an idiot too. First of all, he's not even that funny. Like, I don't laugh at his jokes… ever. And my crush better not be laughing either because she knows me. Her tastes should be real specific by now. My homies don't even talk about him, so he's irrelevant. He isn't on the football team or the basketball team, or any team. I don't play for this crusty school, but at least I still ball in the neighborhood every other day. This dude is probably up in the bleachers or at home.

What's really making me mad is the fact that she didn't tell me. We talk in 5th period all the time, and she didn't think that she had to tell me? I thought we were friends. She's already acting fake cause she hanging out with these other guys. Plus, he was sitting with her at lunch, and she hasn't EVER asked me to sit with her. What is that? How did I get skipped?

Then in 5th period, he came by the class - cause Mr. Allen doesn't care - and was talking to her. He had ME 3rd wheeling. This is MY classroom and she brought a whole new guy to our table! And my crush was all smiling at him as if he wasn't destroying the whole vibe with his stale jokes disguised with an overconfident smile with his fake self. I bet he's just gonna break her heart. Just watch. And when it happens, she's gonna ask me for my number.

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November 26th

I was trying to do something nice for my crush. She was talking about how she has having problems in her government class - a class that I have an A in - so I figured this was my chance. I told her that I could help her study. It won't be a date-date, but we vibe so you know how that could go. I'm not saying she's fast. I'm just saying I can be a little irresistible sometimes. But she's still slow. Have you been praying for her?

Don't think I'm a bad guy for wanting some alone time with her. Her and that other guy have only been dating for a little over a week, so I can still shoot my shot. Plus, dating isn't marriage, so she should be free to talk to whoever she wants. If her boyfriend has a problem with it, that just means he knows their relationship isn't secure. If I was her boyfriend, I'd have her tied down. She wouldn't want to hang out with anyone else except for me. Guys are always trying to get mad when they're the ones not doing their job. If her boyfriend is not making her happy, then why can't I step in and treat her like the queen she is?

The issue is that my crush is too busy trying to be extra for this guy. She told me that we can't study at my house - we gotta go to the library. I asked her why, and she said that she can't go to a guy's house alone. "A guy"? Who does she think I am? I'm not just "a guy"! We've been talking in 5th period since the beginning of the year! Then when I pressed her about it, she said her mom told her that she couldn't go to another boy's house. I swear she's being so fake. Her mom probably didn't even say anything. It's all excuses for her little boyfriend. She's being stupid if she's letting another guy tell her what to do. She's free to do whatever she wants without some guy trying to control everything. I hope she understands that soon.

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December 3rd

Winter Formal is coming up, but it still doesn't seem like my crush is going to break up with that guy anytime soon. To be honest, she really needs to hurry up because we can't wait until the last minute to pick out our outfits. I just know we're gonna look so bomb together. We're gonna take some pictures, we're gonna be all over my Instagram and Snap, and we're gonna chill afterwards. I don't know exactly where, but I don't care as long as she's with me. I bet her boyfriend doesn't even think like that. They're always together at school, but I don't see him all on her account. Why isn't he showing her everywhere? He should be proud that she was actually willing to date him. If I was her boyfriend, she'd be all over my Instagram, and she would be on my lockscreen. Everyone would be able to see that she is my wifey.

She was talking about him in 5th period, and I was getting irritated really fast. She told her friend that she was a little sad that they didn't get to text as much last night for whatever reason. There's really no excuse. I don't get why she even puts up with him. I would text her 24/7. After school, I saw her little boyfriend and told him that he needed to treat my best friend better. He looked at me and rolled his eyes. I swear his ego is gonna make her break up with him. I'm just trying to be nice and let him know before he gets caught up.

The next day, my crush was bold enough to press me about what I said to him. His scary self must've snitched because he was feeling insecure about me. Like I thought. She told me that I didn't need to talk to him about what she said, and that him not replying back that one time wasn't serious. She claims she wasn't upset, she just missed him. Missed him, my butt. She was sad, and she's still trying to cover up for him. I swear she's starting to get on my nerves.

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December 10th

So Winter Formal happened this week. My crush still didn't ask for my number. She didn't even go as my date. She was still with that douchebag, and she seems like she likes him or whatever.

Turns out, he does have a job. And a car. Maybe that's what girls like. I don't have either of those, I just play ball. I've come to learn that girls don't like down-to-earth guys. They just let us pass by, but jump to the chance to get with any guy that has money. I was hoping my crush wasn't a gold-digger, but it's obvious she is. Otherwise, she would've realized that I was perfect for her.

I still went to Winter Formal but, of course, we weren't matching. She and him wore blue...what a cliche color. They were dancing and stuff...well, trying to. The idiot can't even dance, yet my crush was dancing and laughing anyway. Yup. Just akekeke-ing away. Well, that guy can akeke-keep her. She wasn't worth my time after all. I've divorced my wifey. She isn't even that cute anyway. So forget her. Forget him. And forget this word count too.

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