34 Dear Diary

Dear diary,

I'm writing after a long time, after my ups and downs, my sorrows and my joys, my tears and my laughter. I'm writing because of the relief I feel and because the happiness is just piled up inside of me that I have to let it all out before I suffocate and die of happiness...its possible.

Two years, its been two years since I left my family and everything else behind. I had told my father about my true feelings, but he never listened...he didn't care, all he wanted was power...all he wanted was money. I did explain to John, my ex-brother, that I couldn't do it. I couldn't marry him, the same man I've known as my brother for my whole life. He understood, he always did...he knew me well enough to know that I had really fallen in love....it wasn't a crush or a fling....I loved Carlos, I loved more than I could ever explain.

He spoke to my father himself the next day after I explained everything to him. He said he had feelings for me...I still don't know how to feel about that, I never expected it.

Though he spoke to my father himself, my father still harboured some intentions, he refused to give it up and said if I wouldn't marry John then I would have to marry another man of his choice. It was frustrating at that moment, I had completely hated my father. Especially when I found out the man he wanted me to marry was over 60years old.

During the dinner when he was introducing to the man, I told all of them that I was married, I was already legally married to Carlos months ago.

The looks on their faces were priceless, my mom was happy for me...I was glad she didn't scold me like my dad did. My dad scolded me a lot throughout that night while the old man left angrily saying he felt insulted, my father tried to force me to get a divorce...I didn't, I wasn't as weak as I was before, I carefully picked my words and made sure that after I was done speaking he was speechless and couldn't argue anymore.

Today...today its my wedding, the official one of course. We decided on a white wedding. I can't seem to stop myself from smiling, I don't think I've ever been this happy. I have let go of all of my remorse and sorrows, I have forgiven my father but that doesn't mean the law will. He is currently in jail and unfortunately can't make it to my wedding.

They gave him fifteen years.... Quite a long time if you ask me.

I hope he's much better when he's out.

Its almost time, I designed my wedding dress....its beautiful and I've never felt and been so beautiful before today.

This might be my last entry into this book....not only because this is the last page of the book but also because I've decided to end this dairy here. I'll take everything life gives me one day at a time and enjoy each experience and ride and share the thrill with my loved ones around me.

I hope to give this book to my daughter..if I get one, or to my granddaughter.

Oh! Its time. Bye!💛