12 Becoming Better

Dear diary,

I got in!. I got into the university of my dreams,it was not easy but I did it. I am really happy.

It won't be easy, it won't be easy for me to leave my family but, I have no other choice.

Staying here just makes me feel more depressed every single day. As much as I would love to spend as much time as I can with my family and maybe ask my dad about what I heard a few days back.....I can't bring myself to do it. I know that I am practically running away but, I am not that strong... I am not as strong as everyone thinks I am.

I'm just a girl who wants her father's love....I'm just a girl who doesn't want to be hated by her father just because she wasn't born male.

I overhead my parent's argument a few weeks ago....Mr Thomas said he hates the fact that I wasn't a son....I still don't get why he would think that. I know it is common in our country and culture to want male sons but what about John?.....why am I suffering for something that isn't my fault?

This will be a new beginning for me, this will be a fresh start and maybe.....just maybe, one day I might become better and stronger....I might be able to face everyone.....finally.

~My loneliness is just beginning.... is there anyone out there who cares?...