Diagnosis Gay

Dr. Arthur Katsuyama, third generation Japanese-American, sat and listened with patience as Connie went on about her grandchildren. He needed to get her out of the office, having long ago settled her issues over a medication change. She was on too many she didn’t need. His mind shifted to calls he needed to return and pending patients.

“I’m boring you.” She announced.

“No, no.”

She cackled. “Yes, I am. I saw your eyes gloss over. I talk too much.” She stood, slowly got her coat on, and grabbed her purse. The old ones always moved slow. “You’re so polite to listen, and you have a full waiting room. Don’t worry, you’re young and will find your balance in the business end of medicine.”

“I’m sorry, Mrs. Garducci.”

“Nothing to be sorry for. I’m grateful you’re fixing me, and are the first physician in years to go over my medications in depth. All the other doctors just kept adding more and more drugs. You’re an angel.” She patted his hand and headed out. She nodded and winked, exposing a youthful energy hiding behind her old eyes.

For ninety, she’s doing fine.

Robert shuffled up to him. “Doc, you have to cut the times shorter. We’re way behind and have already rescheduled two patients. Mr. Shemper is next up.”

“Thanks, Robert. I’m sorry, it’s just—”

“You’re not the first rookie doctor I’ve had. I’ll get you into the swing of things.”

Dr. Katsuyama rushed into the treatment room. “Mr. Shemper, I’m sorry to keep you waiting.”

Mr. Shemper scowled. “Don’t they teach you to be on time in medical school? My time is important, too.”

“They don’t really teach that in school. I’m sorry, and I know patients’ time is valuable, too. I’m working on being better. May I see your leg?”

Mr. Shemper struggled to stand with his extra one hundred pounds on his fifty-year-old frame. He lost his balance, and Dr. Katsuyama caught the falling man in a bear hug.

“Damn it. I’d have to sue you if I’d fallen.” There was no humor in his voice.

Dr. Katsuyama tried to invoke some. “I’m poor with too many loans to pay off. Let me help you onto the table.” The patient was slow and gasped at the effort to lower his pants. Dr. Katsuyama took deep breaths to stay calm. Upon seeing the sutured wound, he exclaimed, “Ah, this is healing very well. I can take the stitches out. Keep protecting it, and you’ll be fine in another week. Be careful with all saws.”

As he did so, Mr. Shemper moaned, “I want a prescription to make me lose weight.”

“We’ve talked about this before. With a weakened heart and your diabetes and kidney issues, it’s not safe to give you more drugs. A safe exercise program with a healthy diet is the way to go. I’m know that’s challenging, but it’s the best way. Acupuncture helps a lot of people with weight loss.”

“I just want a prescription.”

Dr. Katsuyama removed the sutures, bandaged the wound, and helped the man get dressed and off the table. “That is my prescription. I just won’t in good conscience give you more drugs.”

“Bah. What good are you then?”

He bit his tongue to avoid a harsh response.

As though a savior from heaven came down, Robert knocked. “Doctor. You’re needed.”

Dr. Katsuyama tried to ignore the building stress headache. “Mr. Shemper, if I give you a drug to lose weight, there’s a significant chance it will kill you.” He stared.

“Damn it.” Mr. Shemper rose and waddled out.

Robert waited and led the doc to the counter and whispered, “You have to keep your laptop with you and make notes as you see patients.”

“I hate doing it that way.”

“And you enjoy being so far behind with reports and phone calls?”

“I hate the business end. All I want is to treat people.” He sighed. “I know you’re right, Robert, and I truly appreciate all the help you’re giving me.” He worked a smile up. “Thank you.”

“You’re the best diagnostician in this office, and you’re still new and young. It’ll all come together.”

Mr. Shemper rushed back in via the waiting room door. He glared at Dr. Katsuyama. “I just found out you’re a faggot, and to think I let you touch me with my pants down.” His shouts commanded the attention of everyone around. “There are two queers in the waiting room holding hands, and they were saying what a great guy you are and ‘gay boy does good.’ Damn you!” His jaw clenched.

Doc Katsuyama’s guts wrenched with stress. “Mr. Shemper, I neither hide nor flaunt that I’m gay. I came from the factory this way just as you did with whatever your sexual orientation is.”

“Damn it! You should have it on the forms. I never would have come here—”

Robert spoke. “Mr. Shemper, you’re free to be treated by another doctor, but for now, I require that you lower your voice. You have no right to disrupt the office and keep the doctor from the next patient.” He looked at the doc. “You’re needed in room five.”

Robert’s gentle hand turned the doc, and they strode down the hall. The rest of the afternoon went well, but he spent three hours afterward catching up on calls and reports.