The Younger Years

Can you remember your first young romance? Or your earliest fantasies?Well they obviously start developing in our younger years.

For me, I can remember the first boy that I thought I loved.....we were in Kindergarten, and his name was Lance. He was a cute blonde boy, with piercing green eyes. Oh he was so attractive! We used to run and chase after each other.....it was all so harmless, and our parents thought we were cute together. We would make sure we were partnered up on field trips just so we could hold hands! We continued this through part of Grade 1 as well.... until that one day when he decided it was more fun to just play in the dirt with the boys. I was over boys!

Or at least I was over them until I started Grade 4. It was the start of a new school year, which usually meant a couple new students that had just moved to the area. A new boy was in our class. His name was Reagan. Oh, his dark eyes were so attractive, and his smile was inviting. We instantly hit it off as friends. He lived across the street from me, and we spent hours together playing and riding bikes. I never thought of being more than friends.

Other kids in our class were hooking up, and when we got asked why Reagan and I weren't a couple.....our only answer was.....we didn't think about it! Our classmates already thought we were a couple as we were inseparable. I just really enjoyed spending time doing fun things with this kid.

The first dance of the year came, and we were finally allowed to attend, as we were now in the intermediate grades! All my friends were going with their "boyfriends". I didn't have a boyfriend, so I wasn't going to attend. The day before the big dance, Reagan asked me, "Don't you like to dance?"

"Oh, I love to dance!", I responded enthusiastically, "Why do you ask?" I could feel my heart start beating faster....why was he asking me this, I wondered.

Reagan got a little red from embarrassment. He was shy asking that question but needed to know. "I heard you weren't going to the dance, and I thought maybe it was because you didn't like to dance. Why are you not going?" he questioned.

I contemplated my answer before speaking up, "Well, for one I am not hooked up with anyone....and I can't dance by myself! That would just look foolish, and how embarrassing would that be showing up alone?" I lowered my head, it was kind of sad that I wouldn't be attending the first dance I could go to. There will be others I kept telling myself.

"I don't have anyone to go with, and my sister is making me attend! My parents have already purchased my ticket. I wish I didn't have to go, I'd rather hang out with you and keep you company." he replied quite sincere. Then a sparkle appeared in his eyes and his grin widened. He abruptly got down on one knee in front of me like he was an adult about to propose. He took my hand in his, looked me in the eye, and asked "Lani, will you give me the pleasure of escorting you to the dance?"

Oh my god, did he seriously just ask that? I laughed.....not because I thought it was funny, but because I had butterflies in my stomach. He must've thought I was laughing at him for asking, because the expression on his face dropped. He abruptly got up and ran home. I called after him? but he wasn't looking back.

I felt so bad! What would this mean for our friendship? I hated that sickening feeling in the pit of my stomach, I had to fix this! I ran to his house and knocked impatiently on the door until his dad answered.

"Lani, is everything ok?", he looked across to my house expecting it to be on fire or something. "Are your parents ok?"

"Mr. Guthreau, my parents are fine!", I laughed. "I came to see Reagan. I think he misread my reaction to something earlier, and I came to explain myself. Is he home?"

Mr. Guthreau seemed relieved to hear nobody was dying. He let out a deep breath of relief, and pointed towards the back door. "You will find him in his fort. I hope things are ok with you two! I hear there is a dance at school, does this have anything to do with that? Did he get up the courage to ask you to go? His mother and I suggested he should since you guys do everything together" he explained.

I ran straight out the back door avoiding Mr. Guthreau's questions. I felt even worse knowing that Reagan thought I was rejecting him after his parents encouraged him to ask me to the dance. I reached the door of the fort and yanked it open. I wouldn't let him speak! "You took off and didn't let me answer.....I would love to go to the dance with you! You are my best friend, and we always have fun together. You just kinda scared me asking like you were asking to marry me."

His eyes lit up, "Well then I guess it's a date!"

We went to that dance! We also gave ourselves the title of boyfriend and girlfriend. But all that meant was we'd hold hands, pass notes and spend more time together. This went on until Grade 6, when Reagan's family moved away. I was very sad to lose my boyfriend, but even more sad that I was also losing my best friend!