4 Stab and Pierce my HEART

At this stage in life I get by a day just by watching motivational videos that tell me I'm gonna make it big one day if I put my mind to it and never give up but we all know how it feels to be sad and feel lonely at times but you just gotta live your life. To tell you the truth I wanna commit suicide I don't see my purpose for living if I'm gonna live like this

I'm not sure who I am right now as far as I'm concerned I'm just a boy that was brought on this earth by a neglecting mother and a no show father

That just shows I don't know who I AM. I don't need people who are gonna constantly lie to me, than tell me the truth. And a few days ago when I asked my crush if she felt the same way she just said to me I'm her friend Nothing more and that pierced my heart in such a way that I felt like dying right then and there, frankly I'm not afraid of death so why am I still here, Cause I have a purpose to live for when we all know that's not true ,Cause I'm gonna find someone that loves me the way I love them and yet still that's a NO. A day doesn't go by without me asking myself

"Why am I like this?"

I feel like drowning in my own head

Breathing feels like a burden

taking the next few steps of a day is hard

and I can't seem to figure out why I hate myself so much

the people that love will be the greatest,most amazing people on this earth so keep em close cause the few people I have I'm scared to lose I wake up everyday scared to see a text from my friend telling me that I'm leaving you cause these days it seems like a trend to leave some, betray their trust, hurt them and make them unable to trust the next person they have.

You can scroll through social media right now Depression is a trend

Insecurities are a trend

Anxiety is a trend

staying up all night wondering why that person left or what's so wrong with you just drags you deeper and deeper into that dark hole. Having that I don't give a fuck attitude is a trend think it's gonna get you somewhere to hate people is the exact reason why they hate you, when people hate you you start starring at the ceiling, it's what all teenagers do these days. Right now, it seems like it's gonna be this way for the rest of your life so you resort to drugs, sex, food, booze which isn't gonna help you in no way but destroy your mental health and in the end you'll commit suicide.

Girls - you don't need to look a certain way for people to like you, beauty does not stem from looks. if you are not willing to send a pic of you naked to a boy so they can like you it's not being scared, it's not thinking it's wrong. It's SELF WORTH you know for a fact that you won't and are not willing to stoop so low just for someone to like you based on what they've seen and not they've experienced if they don't see your beauty form the inside, your talents, your worth then he is not worth it if he doesn't love you, you should remember that there was once a time when you were perfectly fine on your own without him

having a boyfriend or a girlfriend doesn't make the truth harder to digest. if you don't accept reality as it is how do you think the person you love is gonna be able to do that. life can do a lot of damage to one person alone it doesn't matter who hates you, Lucifer hates God and God still finds a way to wake you up in the morning.

To wake up your neighbours, your cousins, your aunt's, you whole family and he doesn't worry what Lucifer thinks about that, in life there will be that one person that hates you and thinks that all that you do is not worth anything, that one person that despises you for no reason. if that person hates you just know that the game of life has something in store for each on of us

you can be the richest guy on earth

The poorest guy in the province

The most disabled person in the town

The smartest in you class

under any circumstances come hell or high waters life will deal with you in either a good or bad manner there is only a certain limit to which you can do something, you can only fill that cup so much until it overflows

every neuron, bone, muscle, tissue, gene, and every piece of DNA work together every day to help you fulfil your purpose. Are you really willing to give all that up simply because one person doesn't feel the same way. Every person has a specific brand of pheromones that attract them to certain people, when two people kiss these pheromones are exchanged in their saliva and the pheromones communicate regarding genetics and inherited immunity. We are genetically driven to desire a mate that has different inherited immunity genes so our offspring have the best chance of survival. In this way we are programmed to find biological success.

you have got to fail in order to succed, when a baby walks he/she falls but they get back up again but they keep trying and trying till they can walk without falling and when they stumble, they making progress and they getting closer to walking till they can.

"Failure means try again

Mistakes mean fix it

No means next opportunity

whatever you do in life always fight for your dreams

and goals no regardless of who stays or who leaves, your imperfections make you perfect, don't base your life on black and white cause the shades of grey are also there"