14 Chapter 22 Something like that should be too easy to use then why can’t I do it?

(RHIO)

The old chapel eerily made my heart warm. Something about it reminded me of a happy moment that rarely happens in my burdensome life. An old woman sat in the corner as she tended to her flowers for sale and it made me recall the white roses 'that lady' gave me that night.

"One basket of roses please," I smiled at her through the car window. "The most beautiful of the white ones."

"Here son," she reached to me and I gave her whatever bills I picked in my wallet.

She looked at me in utter surprise and tried to return most of what I had given. "This is too much dear."

"Please take it," I smiled again in response. How miraculous it was that this place made me smile often. I can't wait to see her once more. I wished, prayed rather, that she'd pass by again.

The chapel was empty when I went in. I expected that much but somewhere within, I was disappointed. My longing was just too much to bear. The porcelain vase by the platform beside the altar went to sight. The roses we had put there the other night still looked good although most of the petals had fallen down. I didn't exactly know how to do a decent flower arrangement so I left the basket on the feet of the altar instead.

"Wow."

I recognized that sweet voice. It was her. I kept my back to her to hide my smile.

"Is there a funeral?" she teased.

"Maybe," my smile fell and I turned to finally see her.

"Really?" her eyes widened in surprise. "Where?"

"Not exactly here," I chuckled sadly.

"Thank God. I'm afraid of coffins and corpses," she admitted. I raised my brow in curiosity.

Her attention went back to the basket of flowers and she excitedly approached it. "Did you buy this?"

"Nope." I lied. "That basket was there when I came."

She seemed to really like them and although she believed my lie, I was happy that it made her smile.

"Why are you here?" she suddenly turned to ask and I was forced to hurriedly avert my eyes somewhere else again.

"Oh, that…I just came to visit. This place ease me up," I thought of another lie to spill but in fact it was true.

She took my hand, my hand, and pulled me close to the votive candle rack. She took out a matchbox and some candles from her bag. She gave me one candle and lit her own. It was then my turn to light mine so she gave me the small box.

"Light yours then we'll pray."

I attempted to use it although never in my life had I held something as such. I've got a Zippo that was probably on the car so I just took one stick and stroked it against the side of the box. It didn't light up. Second one broke. Third one did too until it slowly ran out of content.

Something like that should be too easy to use then why can't I do it?

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