1 1. NEW FACE

-Jakarta 2021

The night wind came blowing on my hair making some of my hair sways with the wind, I remained silent standing on the balcony of my room enjoying the light of the moon tonight.

"Can I make it through?" I mumbled to myself as I kept my eyes locked on the moon that was constantly above me. With a heavy breath, I sighed and went back into my room, closing the door and also my curtains.

I lay down on the bed, closed my eyes as I kept muttering that everything would be okay.

***

The morning sun entered through the glass on the left side, making the girl blink and couldn't help but open her eyes and wake up from her sleep. With unsteady steps, he walked into the bathroom to clean himself and also prepared to go to school.

She walked down the stairs to the dining room and approached a man spreading garlic butter on whole wheat bread before finally ending it with a slice of cheese on top.

"Morning sweetheart." The man greeted when he noticed the girl's presence in front of him. The man handed him a plate containing a sandwich he had made earlier. "It's your first day, don't let you mess up today." The man advised, while the girl chewed the bread and nodded slowly.

"I have no appetite." She muttered putting the bread down, the man didn't respond but just smiled and stopped his activities.

"Want to go? I'll deliver." The girl nodded again and took the bag that was beside her while tidying up her uniform.

The two of them got into the same car and stopped at the gate of a large school. The man reached into something in his backpack, pulled out a card wallet, and handed it to the girl.

"I don't know what your needs are, but you can use that to buy anything you want." Without permission, he tucked the card wallet in the front of the girl's bag. The girl was indifferent and then got out of the car and immediately walked into the school area.

His steps stopped at a room tagged with the teacher's room and entered it, looked around, and met a teacher who he believed was his homeroom teacher here.

"Okay, I'll take you to class." The girl nodded, then turned to her left to see someone looking at her intensely and smiling at her.

"Strange people." He mumbled softly and then walked away following the teacher.

She entered the classroom and studied his classmates' faces one by one trying to remember them all. He remembered that it was the first day and there should be no mess.

"New student, please introduce yourself."

"Good morning, my name is Elainne Deandra Liu, just call me Elainne, I'm from the Hwa Chong Institution Singapore school, don't worry about talking to me because I can speak Indonesian, nice to meet you all." The explanation was short, he looked lazily at all the eyes that saw him as if amazed.

"Okay, please sit over there." The teacher pointed to an empty spot in the middle of the classroom and Elainne complied.

"Hi, nice to meet you, my name is Chloe." Who is a woman he knows is his seatmate? The girl greeted Elainne warmly and only a short smile returned with Elainne.

"Nice to meet you."

During the lesson, Chloe often glanced at Elainne who was busy writing and highlighting the book she was holding.

"Stop glancing at me, I'm still straight." Elainne muttered as she kept her focus on reading the book. Chloe felt she got a good response from Elainne.

"After it's time to go home, do you want to go straight home or do you want me to take you around the school?" Chloe offered to the girl, while the girl with the name tag Elainne only responded briefly.

"I have a business, maybe tomorrow."

I got through my first day well and I didn't make any messes, even though I've never really messed up. I walked through the lobby hallway and waited until Hansel came to pick me up.

"How is this school?" Hansel asked while continuing to focus his gaze forward.

"Well, it's not bad" I answered perfunctorily, then silence enveloped the atmosphere in this car, we were both silents. Hansel was busy driving while occasionally receiving calls from his secretary and while I was just quietly opening my cellphone and checking incoming e-mails.

I turned to Hansel and slightly listened to Hansel's conversation with his secretary. From their conversation, I can conclude that after taking me home, Sis Hansel must return to the office to take care of important files that have just been sent by his co-workers.

This has become my daily diet, alone at home, taking care of myself. I'm slowly getting used to it since we both lived in Singapore, to take care of our move, Ms. Hansel also had to work extra to have time to help me register my school and find a house for us to live in.

He often left me to take care of his work, but he was still responsible for watching me from afar, ensuring I was okay. Every night I secretly hear Hansel come into my room, fix my blanket and kiss my forehead.

At least he didn't leave me.

From the parking lot of the house, I saw a foreign car parked neatly in front of the house, reflexively I cast my gaze at Hansel as if asking through my gaze, who was the guest who had come.

Hansel did not respond, he asked me to get out of the car and enter the house as if nothing had happened or that there were no guests in the house. When the door was wide open, I could see the middle-aged man sipping tea in the living room acting like he was the host here.

"What are you here for?" I asked coldly, I could feel Sis Hansel immediately grabbed my hand by giving a little squeeze in my hand, he was holding me so I wouldn't respond too far.

"Seeing my two kids with their new home. You're not as happy as papa is here." The answer is relaxed, I also reply to the squeeze of Hansel's hand and my breath has started to get heavy. My voice was stuck in my throat making it a little sore, I desperately held my voice so I didn't have time to get a high note at this old man in front of me.

"If it's obvious, why ask again?" I answered again. I quickly left the living room and got into my elevator, wishing I could get in and lock myself in my room. I could hear Hansel several times calling me to stop my steps but it was all in vain.

Because I'm too fed up with this family especially the old man because just looking at it makes me hold back my nausea.