39 A Favor (3)

Princess Leping gave me a small nod, and I immediately set back to work, a renewed sense of calmness crashing over me as I blocked out the rest of the world.

You've treated diseases as such before, I beckoned to my former memories for assistance, letting them dictate my every action.

Focus.

Focus, I reminded myself.

The golden backdrop faded away into greenery, and the gathering crowd blurred into obscurity. Instead of a tangle of court intrigues, all I saw was a patient in need of help and my obligation as a former apothecarist.

I helped the young princess sit up straight again, seeing that she temporarily controlled her breathing before I put the cup of steaming tea to the corner of her mouth.

"Breath in and then take a sip," I gently nudged at her, and she looked at me with her doe-like eyes. But she was barely able to keep them open for long, her body worn out from the past few minutes of convulsions.

She nodded weakly, her small hands clawing onto my arms in an attempt to hold herself upright.

Her face flushed unevenly and with a few needles on her side, she looked like a broken doll as she took a sip of the hot tea. "Hot," she whispered, slightly heaving as she said those words in an attempt to control a cough.

Checking that the needles had not shifted, I responded like I would coo to an infant, "That's why it's all the better for you."

She took another gulp, the warmness temporarily pacifying her coughs and the medical components alleviating the pain in her lungs. While her breaths were still short, the color gradually returned to her skin.

The initial panic within her body was ceased, but I poured her yet another cup of tea.

After a few moments of breathing in and out alongside my rhythmic reminders, it was clear that she was temporarily out of danger, and I wiped the beads of sweat that had been unknowingly dripping from my forehead.

"Will I die?" she suddenly asked out of the blue, a hint of worry etched into her before-careless face, both hands clasping onto the white porcelain cup as if it was her last tether to life. "Who will be there to accompany Mother if I die?"

A tear rolled down her cheek, and a pang of worry ran through me. If her emotions went unchecked again, all that I had stabilized before would be for naught. My heart jumped a beat.

"My dear young princess, nothing will happen to you," I reassured, gently rubbing her head.

Her eyes were full of doubt. "But it hurts so much every time," she sniffled, and her easy to read emotions shot an arrow into my conscious.

My actions from earlier to please her suddenly felt so wrong. She was a living person and not a pawn, and I cursed myself for ever thinking of her as such.

"As long as your mother is here, she wouldn't allow for you to leave from her life," I smiled. "And if Youshi is by you, I too wouldn't allow such a precious girl from such woes."

I checked her pulse, sensing that there were no additional disruptions to the rhythm.

Beat.

Beat.

Beat.

It was steadier than ever, fit for a blooming girl of the best age. And with a breath of relief, I slowly removed the needles from her acupoints.

"I promise you would be fine," I repeated. There was no underlying disease apparent from her pulse.

The young girl looked down thoughtfully, her head dipped low for a brief moment. I took the moment to signal to Princess Leping that the situation was under control. She immediately bolted over, holding her skirts high and near-sprinting to her daughter's side.

She put her hands on her daughter's head and brought it close to her chest. On the verge of sobbing, she instead blinked back her tears and hid her worries from the child.

Perhaps it was my imagination, but the air was suddenly fresher to breathe, the staleness associated with being enclosed in a cage disappearing. It was almost as if I was back where I originally began, doing what I thought I would do for the remainder of my life.

And seeing the loving mother and daughter embrace, I suddenly longed to fill that emptiness in myself. If it was another life, would it have played out differently?

Would I too have grown up with a loving mother who cared for me as a pearl doted upon on the tips of her hands? Could I too marry a man I love and have children who would not simply be bargaining chips in a political alliance? And would I have remained in the apothecary and rewrite medical histories?

But it was all foolish talk anyways. From the very start, I was the curse.

Visually inspecting one last time to see that she was now well, I dipped into a bow before heading back to my assigned room, knowing that the time for Youshi the apothecarist was gone. The bow was one a medic would use to bid good day to his patients, not a ritualistic curtsy taught by the Sui court.

Instead, it was to bid goodbye to Youshi. Now, the Fourth Princess of Liang had to return.

She had a marriage to prepare for.

I tucked the needles back into my inner robe, casting a glance at the cowering crowd of imperial physicians before heading back.

It as not long after dinner that a knock sounded by my door.

Looping up to see Princess Leping, the calmness returned to her face as if a mask of still water, I immediately dipped into a formal curtsy. "Youshi greets the Empress Dowager of Zhou."

"Where did you learn that tea could cure such an illness?" Her voice was flat as she interrogated me, all the feelings within her channeled towards her daughter, leaving only emotionlessness for me.

"Such respiratory illnesses are more frequent in the South due to the climate, and it is not rare for children playing in the fields to be provoked by irritants in the air," I responded as formally as I could.

"Commoners' lives aren't thought of to be worth more than a cup of tea, so I suppose that it is good that such simpleness could tame the coughs," I couldn't help but adding, a bitter smile twisting onto my face as I was reminded of the times the family couldn't even afford a few tea leaves. "The young princess is a golden flower, and if she takes additional treatments such as chan hua, she is bound to be fine."

Sensing no response, I took out a piece of parchment and used the prepared ink to draft out a detailed procedure for treatment.

"Today…" Princess Leping's voice trailed off, and she looked into the distance before finally whispering, "Thank you."