36 Mother's Sight

~TIEN LYN~

Chongs' carriage climbed one more hill, and then another, until Sutao was completely hidden from sight.

"Landscapes... " Ho's breath tickled her ear, as he muttered sleepily. "Zha Yao shot the Prefect, and I feel obliged to paint the landscapes we are leaving because of him... The cherry tree in bloom... the cherry tree under the snow... the cherry tree when the fall winds blow..."

Tien Lyn laughed merrily. "We can always present your timeless masterpieces to mother as a token of our gratitude. Or to Zha Yao himself."

Yu moaned something in response to her voice, still lost to the world.

She tucked the blanket around him and chuckled realizing that she'd gotten a mother's sight. She noticed a lot more creatures in need of being held and guarded against all ills.

Ho moaned more piteously than Yu.

"It won't be so bad, you'll see," she promised him. "We'll be out of everyone's reach, the Empire's, Zha Yao's, mother's... all of them."

The village of Zushulin did not dash her hopes. It laid hidden far away from the fighting, and far away from Sutao, in short, it was a perfect place where the Chongs could remain forgotten about.

The manor on the hilltop was quickly scrubbed and aired out by the tenants attached to Ho's country manor. Ho sent his manager back to Sutao to take over the daily running of the estate and spent hours reading each letter he received from Sutao. He painted the giant tree in the courtyard several times.

Tien Lyn could see the village from the upper gallery's windows, as well as the network of canals, cut through the unbelievably green rice paddies. One by one, she collected furnishings, even a guzheng.

Yu knitted himself back together by the summer's end in his mysterious way. Well, part of his recovery process was hardly unheard of arcana. He had a voracious appetite. Tien Lyn watched him inhale another pot of rice with a smile, then went back to teasing a gentle melody from her new instrument.

"A lullaby?" Yu left the rice for a moment.

"Very likely," she smiled again, fully content. Wo Jia and his wars, Zha Yao and Lady Chen's rebellion were far, far away from here. Here, there would be peace.

Yu looked to the floor, then lifted his eyes on her without fully lifting his face. She mostly saw the shaggy mass of red hair. His wide, troubled eyes were barely visible underneath it, as if sketched with two short brushstrokes. It was unnerving and endearing at the same time.

"Your son comes at the late fall break," he said.

"Yes, blessed healer. Or a daughter. Maybe."

He blinked under his attention-stealing mop. "His qi is not strong enough to live till then."

She jerked her hands away from the strings and stared at him with her mouth opened.

Peace was an illusion. She was reduced to a little girl sitting in the shadows by the family shrines, watching her mother mourn and wondering what might have been if her four brothers lived, and her sister. Wondering why they had not.

She did not question Yu's words. Denial was pointless. It made sense that she met with failure, an absolute, final and irreparable defeat.

I was like water all my life, waiting to be poured into whatever cup. Why should the Celestials bless the ones that make do with fates handed down by others?

Yu watched her like an old man with a fishing rod watches the flowing water. It's not the fish they are after, it's the watching.

He blinked. "I can lend him mine. I think."

A tidal wave of relief flooded Tien Lyn and overflowed as tears. "Yes, please, please..."

"But... I cannot say if he turns out like me," Yu cautioned.

"If there is anything... anything at all...." she was not at all ashamed to beg. Or anything else for that matter. She would have cut her flesh into ribbons, ground her own bones into dust for her child to live.

Yu got up. "I will go ask Master Chong Ho's permission. He might not let me."

"Ah. Wait!" Tien Lyn wiped away at her tears with the back of her palm. Now that the blessed healer gave her hope, she felt ashamed of never even considering Chong Ho's feelings. "Have you seen him draw that tree, Yu?"

Yu nearly succeeded in hiding himself behind his irritating bangs.

"It is not even a tree any longer!" she pleaded, "Lines, angles, calculations... and he starts it anew day after day. He is unhappy here, Yu, too far away from his business. I will not add the burden to his mind."

She was sure it would crash Ho, the weeks of waiting to see if his second wife falters, if his second child lives, and if he is born afflicted by an unstable mind. She could not do it to him. Her voice strengthened as if rising it would protect Ho better. "Do not tell him, blessed healer. Please."

Desperate words. Desperate hope. Of course, he'd want to have the father's permission!

Yu looked up and blinked. "You know better, Mistress Tien Lyn."

That simple? I just had to ask him? After he'd already offered me more than anyone had ever given a mother?

Her eyes watered with the very different tears. She thought, suddenly, of her mother. Lady Chen Guang did not have her hopes shored up by a healer whose life-giving ability was beyond what was thought possible. Each and every time she'd carried a child, she had to keep the dwindling hope alive all on her own.

Tien Lyn resolved to put this grandchild into her mother's arms, no matter if Lady Chen Guang was not thrilled by the lineage of the man who fathered her baby, and no matter the cost. "What do you need of me to heal my son?" She almost said 'child', but there was no 'maybe' left. She would give birth to a son, just like the blessed healer told her, a living son.

Looking even more embarrassed than usual Yu muttered: "Food, Mistress."

Tien Lyn burst out laughing. And here she thought she would have to perform the dark rites or surrender something priceless. She should have known. The blessed healer was... well, she did not know what he was exactly, but he was as simple and good as sunlight. If her son took after him in some way, it could not be ill.