9 9. Signing The Contract

I pondered over the contract from the moment I left the building till I reached my apartment. I had a lot to think about because this could change my entire life. So, I tried to make a pros and cons list as I had always done whenever I had to make a major decision.

So, starting with the pros:

• It was a really good offer. It help me keep a roof over my head and feed me as my savings were draining faster than sand slipping from a hand.

• I could travel the world. It could really broaden my horizons. I could visit all the countries I wanted to see.

• It would be interesting to cook with so many limitations as Mr. Hardy had so many allergies to consider. It would definitely put me out of my comfort zone and I could really improve my cooking.

• My contacts in the industry would increase and it would be easier to find a job after my contract was up.

Cons:

• It was potentially dangerous and I was scared sh*tless that I might crack under the pressure.

• I just started to recover from a major trauma and this may push me towards the edge way too fast and I don't want that.

So, it was clear that the pros outweighed the cons but the major con included my mental health and I couldn't just ignore it so I decided to call Dr. Williams.

Dr. Williams picked up the call on the first ring.

"Hello." came her sweet voice through the phone. Just hearing her voice calmed me down just like a man's turmoil is calmed down after listening to his lover's voice. I don't know why that analogy popped into my head.

" Hello, Dr. Williams, it's me Noe", I replied. " Do you have any slot you can fit me in today? I want to talk to you about something." I hesitantly asked. There was a moment of silence before she answered.

" Sure, I can see you at two. Is everything alright? " She asked, a hint of concern in her voice.

"I am fine, I just want to talk to you about something. I will see you at two." With that I hung up.

I waited for the clock to stuck one so that I could leave my apartment and go and visit her. Her clinic was a bit far from my apartment so it would take at least forty five minutes to reach there.

I was just on time because as soon as I entered, I saw Dr. Williams seeing out her last patient.

"Come on in, Noe."

I followed her in and she asked, "So, what was so urgent that you needed to see me asap(1)?"

"I got a job offer today. It's a job for a personal chef for Matthew Hardy, the diamond magnate. They want me join tomorrow." I replied.

" That's good news, isn't it?"

" Yeah, it is. Except I feel like it's too much of a risk for reasons I am not allowed to disclose with anyone and I feel that it would not be good for me mentally."

" So, what is it that you want my help with?"

" I want your opinion on whether or not I should accept the job."

" That has to be your decision. I can only help you through the process. All I can say is you need to take some risks in life. Whether the situation pans out the way you want it to, at least you would have no regrets. If you think that you are capable enough to handle the stress, there is no reason for you to not accept it. However, at the end, it's still your call. You have to go with your gut because it never leads you in the wrong direction."

Her words were powerful and they hit me where they needed to. Along with Linda's words, I was assured that I could do this. My gut was also pointing me in the same direction.

All my life, I have listened to what others have told me. I was never given the opportunity to choose my own path. My career, my love life, my wedding, it was all planned out by my parents. I was never given a say in it. Even my fiancé was the son of my parents' best friends.

Look where that got me, betrayed, unemployed, unloved and without anything to show for my life.

So, maybe I needed to do this in order to prove myself that I can be worth it too.

"Thanks for your help, Dr. Williams." I replied after my self-reflection was over.

Seeing the determined look on my face, she said, " Congratulations on your new job, Noe."

I was surprised on hearing her words. 'Am I that transparent?' I asked myself.

Nevertheless, I thanked her. She reminded me to be on time for my next appointment and said that she would see me the next time.

After that, I left her clinic and called Linda.

"I agree." I said as soon as she picked up the phone.