1 The Red Thread

- Holland -

My past life must've been hard...my birthmark is on the side of my head. My great grandmother told me that I had gone through many hardships because I had shot myself with someone that was really special to me. Of course, she's dead, but her explanation gave me a good telling on why I hated noises like gunshots or explosions so much. Don't get me wrong if I know there's going to be a noise like that beforehand it won't affect me. Horror movies have no effect on me either. But there are a few things I do know...I've felt empty all my life like I was looking for someone. The dreams of little details I do remember come up all the time. Each time I remember a name, but when I wake up it disappears...and I wake up in tears. Feelings overcome me like a strong gust of wind for a short minute. Sometimes I don't have to be asleep for it all...I remember my grandma had smashed a pan to the ground on accident. It fell so hard that when I was walking it made me hit the ground and cry. Each time something like this happens one image comes up in my mind. Someone held a gun to they're head and the emotions of pain and fear overcame me as my "dad" held me back and let me watch the trigger get pulled. When I escaped his arms I ran to the newly dead man and cried.

"You said you'd never leave me."

I would mumble to myself through the tears as unbearable pain shot through me. I had eyed the gun and quickly grabbed it, holding it to my own head as my throat and chest hurt from breathing seeing that stranger dead on the floor. I then shoot myself and everything goes completely dark. There is no context before it all either. I know my story but I barely see it and even if I do I never really remember. The only thing I hold after these dreams are unstable but certain feelings.

"Go Taeseob...you're crying again..." I snap back to reality and smile as I quickly start to wipe my own tears.

"Sorry, and I told you to call me Holland! Ass wipe." I've known my friend, Samuel Kim here, since freshman year of high school and well I love this dumb bitch.

"Sorry, but do you need to talk?" He looked at me with concern and I just smiled.

"No, anyway, we need more friends..." As soon as I said that a boy and a girl turned around in the line with fairly good looks and pretty smiles. The boy faded blue-dyed hair and the girls' natural brunette brown hair.

"I'm Lee Suhyun, nice to meet you." The girl said, shaking mine and Samuel's hand with a cute little chuckle.

"I'm Lee Chanhyuk, nice to meet you both." The faded blueberry said sweetly. I smile as I and Samuel shake the boy's hand.

I'm Holland, this is Samuel and he's not important."

"Hey!" Samuel yells hitting my arm and I just giggle through my pain.

"Are you two brother and sister though?" I asked and they quickly put on an offended face.

"Why does everyone always get that right?" Suhyun said in a baby pout and I just laugh.

"Y'all look a lot alike. Plus...you two seem close." Chanhyuk and Suhyun smiled and nodded.

"Fair." She said sweetly and now it was our turn to sign our name on the freshy college page. We did and now we're going to the canteen together.

"Oh, look it's the swimming club president. Jaeseok!" Suhyun yells and that's when my life hit me. Those stupid depressing feelings. Why do I feel like I need him...he's just a person.

"Oo, let's go see the red thread!" Chanhyuk said pointing towards the school's theatre.

"No, I'm hungry! Let's eat...they play this every semester anyway!" Samuel yelled and I looked at him in shock.

"How did you know, or even remember that?" I asked and he snapped back but with a shy stare.

"I might have listened in on some seniors." I laughed and slapped the back of his head.

"Good thing, let's go eat," I said and everyone led the way, but as we were walking I pulled Suhyun back.

"Ok, remember that guy? What's his name?" She giggled and her smile was wide.

"I said it, but why are you interested?" She asked like a fangirl and I just looked at her awkwardly.

"Suhyun is obviously a BL fan," Samuel said and I just smiled. Guess she should know I'm gay??

"Well if he's interested in Jaeseok I'm legit making it a real ship. I thought they would look good together." I smile trying to hide it.

"Well Holland here is gay as hell, he might be interested." Samuel shrugged his shoulders and Suhyun quickly screamed in my face scarring all of us. She smiled and looked at me.

"You and Samuel wouldn't be that bad looking together though," Chanhyuk says and with an evil smirk and Samuel throws his arm around Chanhyuk's shoulder.

"Yeah right, and why aren't you on our side huh?" Samuel said. The two started exchanging words and left me with Suhyun.

"Ok, so tell me you were thinking about hitting him up," Suhyun said and I smiled a bit.

"Maybe..." She squealed and I just laughed.

"Chanhyuk is joining the swim team, use him from now on, ok?" I nod and smile a bit wider as she giggles hugging my arm.

"Ok, now let's go eat!" Time passed by so quickly I honestly forgot how we ate...wait...what we ate? Yes...wait...never mind you get it.

"Hey, Samuel, Holland!" Chanhyuk yelled after us with Suhyun by his side. I smiled and Suhyun attacked me.

"We are going to the swimming club to see Chanhyuk audition. Not bad timing today since you had your eyes out huh?" Suhyun said with a big smile mocking me.

"Sounds fun!" Samuel says with a cute smile. I laugh and Suhyun jumps to Chanhyuk.

"Ok, so we watch you race right?" Chanhyuk nods as Suhyun's comment and then Samuel opened his big dumb mouth.

"Then we EAT!" We all laugh and I look at Samuel.

"You should join the cooking club with that in mind." I smile and he just shakes his head.

"I'm music, Suhyun is Drama, Chanhyuk Swimming, you are cooking." Samuel pointed out rolls and I pulled up my fist threatening to hit him and he flinched in a flash.

"Do you want to die with that attitude?!" I threaten and he just smiles and sticks out his tongue mocking me.

"It's good you're coming," Chanhyuk says and I smile.

"I'll make you desserts before we completely celebrate for you ok?" Everyone nods and smiles so I quickly push everyone to head to class.

"Go, go, go, go you guys!" I yell as everyone scatters. I smiled and shook my head scoffing lightly. The time I went to class I-well I didn't, but yeah. I ran into him~. Jaeseok. I wasn't watching where I was going and I bumped into him. I completely fell on my ass, but as soon as I looked up his face showed that he was as shocked as I was.

"Hi..." His voice was gentle but seemed scared. Right before I could say anything he began to cry. I was put in a state of shock until he said the name. That one name that froze me.

"Kai..." How horribly familiar it was.

"Baekhyun?" I couldn't put it together...was he really Beakhyun? If not, how does he know about Kai? The...the past me.

"Does that..." I was going to start speaking, but Jeaseok looked at me with all confusion and fear in his eyes while sadness left his eyes like tears...they were tears. When a minute passed of silence Jaeseok left...I didn't do anything because I couldn't. My body fell terribly weak after that. I pull out my phone, but just then I get another uninvited memory.

"Beakhyun, give me your hand." I held a red thread in my hand and when Baekhyun handed over his hand mindlessly while reading I tie it on his wrist which now connects our hands together. He lifted his head from his book and sighed at me with a boring look.

"What's this?" I smile though he didn't seem to care.

"I heard a red thread tied on lovers locks them together for life and the next one to come because they're souls are really meant to be. Japan has a prettier meaning then we do." I smile but he quickly slams his book closed with an annoyed look so my smile disappears.

"Kai, you idiot. It's supposed to be wrapped on the left pinkies or ankles." I pout and feel sadness overtaking me. Baekhyun flicks me in the forehead and I wince in pain and I rub it but I quickly make a comment.

"Why not? The red thread still means the same thing anyway..." Baekhyun scoffs only more annoyed than before.

"Tying it on the wrist is believed to bring bad omens. Kai, are you trying to kill us both?" I shook my head quickly soaking up what I could remember but then my head began to throb.

"Hello? Hey, are you ok?" I snap back to reality and I see Samuel in front of me and I quickly engulf him in a hug. My mind races and Samuel just hugs me radiating a sweet aura.

"What's going on Holland? Did you have one of those dreams again?" I nod my head while still squeezing him.

"I don't have to keep searching either...I found him." I mumble into his shoulder and he just giggles with relief patting my back.

"That's good...now, let's go. It's time for Chanhyuk's tryouts." Samuel pulls me away to face him and he just wipes my tears with a sincere smile. I nod and smile. Samuel grabs my hand and leads the way. I felt full but empty. Why? Why did Jaeseok leave?

"Holland!" I hear a familiar girl scream snapping me back to reality as I see Suhyun running towards me with a smile.

"Hey." I smile and she runs to me quickly hugging me.

"It's good your here. Everyone just came out, you were almost late!" I smile and Suhyun brings me and Samuel to some seats.

"Ok racers! You're going to go here to the end and back as soon as possible. So that means swim fast, got it?!" A male said and the swimmers, in sync, answered with no hesitation.

"Yes, sir!" They yell but my attention quickly left the swimmers as I saw Jaeseok and someone el-

"Jae Seok and Jung Jewon...Jewon is the captain of the swim team and Jaeseok is the president." Suhyun says mindlessly watching everyone below. I look at her and smile. I can't believe she knows so much...it's useful.

"Marks!" The male said and he quickly watched the swimmers take their part in bending over already. The whistle blew and everyone immediately hit the water. Chanhyuk was ahead and he finished second. me, Samuel, and Suhyun screeched a bit before we went down to the pool to see our friend and well...Suhyun's brother.

"Dude you did great!" Samuel yelled as Chanyuk walked to us with a smile.

"I always have room for improvement too," Chanhyuk said with a bittersweet smile.

"Shush, should we go to eat now?" Suhyun said but I just smiled and shook my head.

"Can't just yet...I'll meet you there though." Everyone nodded and I just smiled as everyone left. For the main courtyard. I turn around and I see Jaeseok and Jewon keeping a quick pace this way so I stop them.

"Jaeseok...can I please talk to you?" He didn't say anything...he just looked at Jewon who nodded, pretty much giving him permission to go so he looked back at me, flashed a smile, and walked away. I followed him and right before I could ask anything spoke.

"We're going to an empty room to the building there. I know somewhere nice and quiet that doesn't have a lot of traffic. We can go there." He stated and I silently listened as I followed him like a lost puppy. We stopped in front of the door and he opens in it quickly walking on...I follow of course and he opened in it quickly walking in...I follow of course and he stands in the middle of the room so I walk towards the window and I quickly lean against the seal and he stares at me in all seriousness.

"Have you heard the story of the red thread?" His voice trembled but no tears. I nod my head and he takes one step closer to me.

"So you know about lovers finding each other in their next lives with the feeling like they've known each other forever because of the past, right?" I nod once again and another step closer he took.

"Did your past life seem different?" I nod following another step.

"Do you remember your past life?" I nod and now he was only three feet from me.

"Does the name Kai belong to our memories then?" I hesitantly nod and another step closer.

"Does the name Baekhyun belong to yours?" I asked and he nodded.

"You promised me Baekhyun..."

"I promised I would find you in our next life and it looks like I did." Jaeseok smiled and I smiled right back. I jumped on him and he caught me and we quickly shared a sweet passionate kiss. I pull away and he lets me down.

"But you....you shot yourself first..." I said turning towards the window to hide my tears and he quickly back hugs me.

"Baekhyun was selfish, I know that I can't leave you like that again...Kai." My heart and breathing stopped...I hated being in love.

"Baekhyun...? C-can you kiss me again? I really did miss you..." My tears began to fall worse than ever. They became never-ending waterfalls. He hugged me and he quickly but softly placed a kiss on my lips. When he pulled away he smiled.

"Let's keep our lives and make the future that we never had in the past, ok?" I nodded and hugged him.

"Holland, I love you."

"I love you to-wait what?" He giggled. How did he know my name?

"Chanhyuk pointed all of you out by name before he left." Jaeseok smiled and laughed and all I could do was pout a little.

"Huh?" I hug him once again and well that's the end of most of my life problems forever. I found Baekhyun again and now he's better than ever. Not because he's better in this life, but because I'm with him once again. I missed him. I guess it was thanks to that stupid red thread...?

-Mayji