4 The Dance With The Donkeys

"Darn it! Damn it! Blast you god!" I continue cursing anyone and everyone's existence and I use my non-existent aerobic abilities to climb the huge and rather strong rope which is currently hidden by the vines I had planted

And Marie thought that I was learning the ability of mothering when I bought this creature..

Maybe if I drop some fat- no! not fat! I am perfectly fit and thin if you ignore the slight bulge in my stomach. But dropping a few kilograms would surely make this torture more easier to bear

My hands reach the ten meter high windowsill and I grab it tightly. Then I began pulling myself up.

"Darn! Damn! Ouch! C'mon!." And the list of profanities continue

As soon as I am halfway in my room, a feminine enquiring screech makes its presence known followed by a set of raps

"-asia? Anastasia? Are you there?"

I look at myself dressed in fine trousers, linen shirt and tailcoat wondering . Maybe I could pretend that I changed into a guy over day. Hormonal changes do occur. Right?

Yeah... Nope

Don't panic. Don't panic. Don't panic

"Anastasia? Are you there?" The voice and the knocks come again

I panic and yell

"No! I am not! Now go away. Chop chop" Chop-chop? Tessa seriously?

You need to spend less time with Rose. That girl is a bad influence on you. And also stop talking to yourself in the third person

The feminine screech comes again "Alright. Goodbye" which is followed by fading sounds of footsteps

That worked?! Bless you God. Bless you

And then knocks echo again and the (unfortunately) familiar feminine screech says "Anastasia I know its you inside"

Blast you God! Blast you!

I rush towards my mahogany made, rather large closet and slam open the doors to be greeted by a thousand dresses. I shrivel inside as I search for something 'appropriate' and 'ladylike' to wear.

You could hide a dancing monkey in this heap

"Anastasia! Open the door! Now!" A yell comes from outside

Just a few minutes more..

"Anastasia! Open the door or I swear I'll-" Marie would have definitely continued with her 'threats' if I hadn't opened the door and interrupted her with my heavy and loud panting breaths

"You. Pant. Were. Pant. Saying. Pant. Something?" I lean against the door trying out my non-existent sophistication skills and attempting to look sophisticated

Marie gives me a look of enquiry and I duly ignore that and continue to grace her with my bafflement. She realises that I am playing the judge here and provides me the information she had cradled delicately

"The royal family is having a ball" Marie announces with enthusiasm and expects me to do the same

Would it surprise you if I say that I didn't do the expected?

I give her a bored look "So? Why did you tell me that?"

Marie gives me a look and tries to bribe me into being enthusiastic "There will be music-

People crying over their lost love again?

"-and other ladies-"

Brainless human being you mean?

"-gentlemen-"

Masculine race who think that female should not be allowed to work?

"-and all our friends are coming-"

You mean your friends who gossip about you behind your back?

"-so I really can't understand why aren't you excited about this!"

Me neither. I don't think I even have a single reason

I give her a look that says Why-the-ducks-are-you-toturing-me-? and ask "Do I have too?"

Bad move. As soon as Marie realises that this ball is going to be torturous for me she states with a sigh

"Yes Anastasia. Uncle said so."

I feel slightly annoyed. Why the ducks do I have to do whatever that old man says? Why? Why?

Since I don't have answers to that question.. all there left to do is;

Excuse my French, Damn that spawn of a devil.

~*~

"They are coming. They are coming. They are coming." Lydia yells as she straightens out the creases in her dress and adjusts the rose which is carefully pined up in her long blonde hair. Her green eyes sparkle as she looks out of the window

Who the ducks got her here?

"Who invited her to this ball?" Did I say just say that out loud? Nah I would never use the word invited.

I look behind me and see Marie wearing a long gold shining gown which shimmers brightly than any of the others and a smile charming enough to show that she was probably the prettiest girl on the planet

Well that is expected, since she is the princess and everything

Did I forget to mention that?

"The Queen invited me, Marie" Lydia says giving her a smile as real as her intellect, then she turns towards me and gives me a look full of loathing "Though, I can't imagine why this embarrassment for a lady would appear in a prestigious place like this"

Embarrassment? Did she forget to look at herself in the mirror today?

"Lydia! That is enough. Do you even know who-"

I quickly turn and clamp my hand on my dear sisters face and mouth a quick 'no' to her

If those jackals came to know that my blood was that of a royal, I would be invited to almost every ball in every state and I don't want to go through that torture

After seeing the ultimate desperation in my eyes, Marie nods and I release her from my hold

Turning to Lydia and deciding to battle my own war "Lydia do you know that people have the right to be stupid?"

I am met with baffled stare "Um.. yes?" Lydia says uncertainly "So what?"

"I was just wondering" I pause to create the suspense "When will you stop abusing the privilege?"

Then with a satisfied smile and my arm around Marie's, I walk out of the room and go down with her to welcome the guests to the ball

That. Was. Brilliant.

Note to self: Ask Grace for more amazing sentences

~*~

"-and then, after getting shot in my right arm, I picked up my grenade and threw it at them and thus saving about ten to fifteen people. I don't want to boast but this party is kind of for me" The man with the potbelly smiles at me showcasing all of his yellow teeth

I bat my eyelashes in response.

The last time I heard, it was to find my sister a groom. Golly, I must be wrong

"That is so brave." I say in a dreamy voice "You say that-" my tone changes from wonderment to bored "You got shot in your right arm and threw a grenade with your right arm, with perfect precision so that it landed just in middle and blasted all the people"

The old douche standing in front of me nods, not getting my sarcasm

I sigh "Can you show me the bullet wound?"

The man in front of me looks shocked and says "You don't believe me, Miss? You don't think that I am strong?"

I give his flabby stomach a look. Do I really need to answer that question?

I try to break the news as gently as possible "I am not saying that you are not strong. I think you are as strong as an ox, just not as intelligent"

And with that said, a jaw dropped, I gather my skirts, curtsy and make my way to the refreshments table and began to gobble down the chocolate milkshake kept on it

Ahh! Heaven.

I hear a familiar screech calling my name

What is that devil doing in my heaven?

I turn my head and see some feminine Homo sapiens with the IQ of a donkey staring at me.

Lydia takes a step forward and says "We noticed you dancing with a man twenty years older than you. I guess no young handsome man wants to come near you. I am so sorry"

Should it be surprising that she doesn't sound sorry at all?

I wince at her high pitched, nasal voice and at the just as head hurting laughter that follows the comment

And they wonder why I absolutely despise balls

"Lydia, would you please leave? Please let me have the chance of experiencing joy, will you?"I plead with her

Lydia gives me a look that would make a toddler cry, leans in and whispers "Listen. You are a nobody. No one cares about you so will you just go and stop being near us or with us. Will you?"

Oh. So this is the part where the evil girl threatens the innocent yet brave and dauntless girl

Since the evil one is front of me then I wonder who is the other one. Oh my, it cannot be me? Can it

Then with a straight face I speak "Lydia. You are right" I put my hands on her shoulders for emphasis and enjoy watching surprise spread across her face

"I am?" She says with confusion probably thinking why I am agreeing with her

"Yes, you are. I understand why you are jealous, I mean, don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent." I turn to Louise and give her a smile as bright as the sun itself "Look at Louise, she clearly has none. But does she let it stop herself? No! She still goes ahead and embarrasses herself"

They gasp (after a few minutes) as if I had just sprouted another head and I resist the urge to say the trademark line:'What? Has the black cat got your tongue?' While I bat my eyelashes innocently

I decide to leave then and there but before I can the black cat gives Lydia her tongue back which Lydia uses and sneers "At least, we are not a man hiding under a woman"

Lydia then proceeds to give me a look over

Respect Lidi! That was actually a good one

I smile sweetly at her and say "At least I have a brain, cannot say the same about you though"

I grin when I see the unpleasant frown on her face

And then the donkey's sidekick decides to humiliate herself

"I am pretty sure that the dress you own was probably bought was the same one I saw on my maid yesterday" Louise chirps in with a psycho grin

"Oh is it?" I say with a gasp as I look at my royal and sky blue gown and look up with the same horrified expression "My, my, Louise, I never knew your father was so generous as to give his exclusive gown to his maid you say?"

Louise blushes with humiliation igniting a spark of guilt in me. The fact that her father was seamstress was not exactly something she was proud of.

She opens her mouth and I interrupt her "I am tired of insulting you. Alright?"

Then with my head held up high, I decide to leave the gathering and proceed to do so

Since my held is high and I am staring at the ceiling, I crash into a masculine chest and realise that there are blue eyes twinkling at me

Holy Bushwa!

"May I have this dance, Miss Grey?" He asks taking a step back and offering me his hand

Darn! Darn! Darn!

****