To be Happy
Seriously, if that damn Maestro wasn't going to shut his trap anytime soon, Renata would surely throw something at his head.
For real this time…...
Squirming and turning in her bed, Renata covered her head with her thick pillow to reduce the noise, but it was like putting a pillow on a honking ship; completely useless. It was 6 in the morning; did he have to practice his musical singing this damn early???? She knew that he had a performance every Saturday night, which was the following night, but really????
Renata yawned and crawled out of her bed unwillingly; she had to get ready for work soon anyway. She turned her face to several frames of photos on her white Scandinavian nightstand, "Morning Dad, Mom. Wish me luck for a good day." The frames were showcasing photos of her father (fast asleep while holding a book in their window nook in their old house), her mother (posing with the first handbag she ever designed), and a giggling Renata with several loose teeth, when she was 2 years old, chased by her parent in their backyard.
She blamed her mother's collecting hobby for making their small apartment cramped with heavy furniture and trinkets all over the place. From a Baroque armchair to a rosewood root coffee table she found in a flea market, her mother would collect anything with good design, even if they were not matched to each other. Well, it couldn't be more unmatched between the weathered-blue kitchen cabinets and her silver stainless-steel Braun coffee maker. She poured her favorite roasted Jamaican coffee bean into her coffee machine, she left it to do some yoga stretching before she prepared herself to work.
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She poured herself a cup of coffee and put the rest of it into a small thermos flask. While enjoying her morning coffee, she checked all her social media outlets. She wondered if there were any new comments on her upcoming product launch. So far, all of the responses had been positive, and Tina had done an excellent job of publicizing the upcoming event.
Renata closed the rickety door of her old apartment carefully as she ushered herself out. She needed to leave earlier before her employees arrived, as she needed to take a little detour. Usually, a CEO could come and go as they pleased, or they could be absent if they wanted to. But not her. She wondered when she had ever had a vacation.
"Ms. Tan, please don't forget to take the mail with you." The apartment manager stopped Renata before she went out to the garage.
"Thank you, I will do so." She smiles at the nice old man, Kevin. Her mother once told her that Kevin had been the manager of this old apartment long before Renata was born.
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Renata had just arrived at the front door of her handbag store, Rosaline Perlée. The store that her parents passed down to her. Rosaline Perlée was like a family heirloom for Renata. She walked into the elevator and then to her office on the 3rd floor, a wide open space with floor-to-ceiling glass windows to the floor, giving bright natural sunlight, with some hanging plants in an industrial theme room. She kept the office just like when her father was still working there, except for several desks with piles and piles of samples, prototypes, and god-knows-what. He probably yelled at her if he was still alive, looking at the mess she made in his territory. The only decent and neat table was for the photoshoot. The first thing she always did was check all the emails and reply to them. Not more than 15 minutes later, Edward, the IT & logistics professional, and Madelayne, the accountant, had also arrived. They proceeded to grab a muffin that Renata bought this morning. And soon, a hurricane of pink.
"Morning, yo all…....Les deseo a todas una feliz hoy. Oh, muffins, I see you visited the old house again, Reyrey." Tina always arrived with a bang. She grabbed a muffin, strode into the office, and ended it with her signature angel pose. Edward and Maggie were perplexed the first time they met Tina, but now they were numb to all the crazy things she had done.
"Well hellouw there….pinky….. What's up with your new pinky hair?" Renata was circling around her to observe what else had changed. Her new flowing pale pink hair was in contrast to her coffee skin, framing her lovely oval face. And those were a very good pair of spiky leather boots; she knew how to accentuate her long legs.
Tina flicked her long pinky hair like a shampoo model. "Pretty, isn't it? I just do the hair this time. Me and mi Querido are going on a date tomorrow. We are going to watch the musical."
"Oh, please, when have you ever not dated Mark? Didn't you say you are going to the pride parade this week? " Renata left her and sat in her chair again.
"The pride parade is on Sunday, darling. Tomorrow is musical time, why don't you watch it for once? I guarantee you that it is una bomba."
"Uh, No, thank you very much. I always get the front-row seat every single morning. Watching it would give me a nightmare at night." Renata grimaced at the thought.
"Hahhaha, ohh darling, watching Henry and hearing him is a completely different experience."
"Nah, I'm good. By the way, Tina, you should check your email. There's this email from the fashion show EO asking about the details of the launching product event. Are there any problems? "
"She's just doing the last-minute checking. Por qué? Are you nervous? You've been doing this your whole life, Renata. What are you nervous about? "
"Ju~st a little… this event will be my next stepping stone. I'm worried if I couldn't do it well. " Renata picked up the family photo on her desk and caressed it with her thumb. It was a photo of her, her father, and her mother in front of her old house 20 years ago.
"Darling, I know several sentimental people, but you are on another level. How much is it now in the market? " She took a seat on an industrial-style armchair in front of her.
"A little over 3 million, perhaps?" Renata placed the picture back on the desk.
"Dios mío, Renata... por favor piénsalo bien. You didn't lose everything, Renata. You have this store your parents gave you. What I'm saying is, you can choose to be happy even without that old house, Darling….." Tina had been living in Philadelphia for more than 10 years, but her Spanish accent was still too thick.
"Woww, you sound like Gerald there…...." She cringed at it. It had been two years since the last time she visited him.
"I still visit him once every two weeks. Maybe that's why. When was the last time you went?"
Renata furrowed her brow, not sure why she asked her that. " I'm 28. He's a juvenile psychiatrist. I'm too old to go there. Besides, it's been a long time since my depression relapsed. I don't think I need to see him anymore."
"I'm 25, and I still prefer him to be my doctor. It's a matter of who I'm most comfortable and familiar with. "
"Why did you see him up until now? I don't think you are still confused about your gender identity. Ah, your family…....." Guess, not all families could accept wholeheartedly the fact that their only son chose to be a queer, just like Tina's.
"Yep, and let's stop discussing this crappy shit, shall we? Don't forget to send me the edited photos before noon, Darling. I will need to send those to the EO for the ads and all kinds of stuff. I and Eddie will arrange the sequence of those new handbags and purses. Now, are you sure not all of the eyewear goes into the event? Because I think they are rocking good. "
"I am Edwaaarrrddd." Oh, Edward, his fault for being the youngest here; he would never win over Tina.
"Shushhh, Darling…....."
"I'm not too sure either, Tina. They are so out of the event theme. What do you think if we put them up as a Fall Season special edition? Maddie, what do you think my mom would do? Would she display them too? " Madelayne was one of the first employees Renata's father hired; she had been here even before the store was established. If there was a person who knew her mother's style aside from her dad, it would be Maddie.
"I think Brigitte would do the same as you do. You know how picky she was." That was true….... Renata went through all of the eyewear photos, undecided.
"Well, you're the boss, Rey…...."
"Then, let's do it that way," Renata said. Tina blew a kiss to Renata before sashaying with a swaying hip.
"Hey, Ren, do you think the rest of the goods will arrive on time?" Edward had been so stressed about the delivery deadline, but there wasn't anything he could send out.
"I hope so. They need one month to reach here from Hong Kong. If they do not arrive within the next week, we will be doomed. I have seen the ship schedule; they should arrive this Monday. "
"What?? Ren, that's too close to the event date. We will need another 3–7 days to deal with the paperwork. Then another 3-5 days to deliver it to our door!!"
"Don't freak out on me, Ed. I know things are not looking good. Let's just hope everything is right on schedule. " Edward left her in anguish, but what could she do aside from wait? Renata was also very worried about this. Using air freight was out of the option; the cost was too outrageous.
Running a store was not like leisurely strolling in the park, especially if the store had already built its name and prestige. The expectation on her shoulder alone could drown her in endless anxiety. The competition in the cutthroat market could make the business go down in a blink. Renata, as the CEO and the sole designer, knew very well how gruesome her job was. It was far from how people pictured entrepreneurs prestigiously. Her employees did their jobs from 9–5. They left their jobs in the office when they stepped out the office door. Even if Renata wanted to, she couldn't. She worked 24/7 for 365 days a year, from managing the business and anything that entailed running a company to creating (predicting) designs that would likely sell in the next season. Her time was not so bent and stretched as she wanted it to be. Talking about work-life balance...... which was practically non-existent.
Renata sighed deeply and once again gazed at the old photo of her family next to her computer's monitor.
Choosing to be happy, huh?
Could she ever?
She didn't deserve to be happy….....
….........