4 This Is Not What I Expected

My first tutor session with Atsuki is tomorrow. I'm kind of nervous. He's a hot guy, with golden blonde hair, and looks like an American model. No, what am I thinking? I should just focus on what I'm going to teach Atsuki today. I put all of my notes in my bag and reviewed some topics before going to bed. In the morning, I woke up and got ready for school. But today seemed different. I made sure I did my hair and ironed out my clothes. It's not much but usually, I don't care about how I look. I double-checked my backpack to see if I forgot anything I needed for Atsuki before leaving the house.

"Hey, Akari!" -Hina

I looked back and Hina and Yui were both behind me. I waited for Hina to catch up.

"Where's Yui? You guys are usually together in the morning cause you live in the same neighborhood as her." -Akari

"Well, I called her but she didn't pick up, so I went and stopped by her house to see if maybe she already left but she was still asleep. Her mom said to go first and she'll wake Yui up" -Hina

"That's strange, Hina oversleeping? Must have stayed up all night studying." -Akari

Both Hina and I laughed at that statement and hurried to school. We headed to class and sat at our desks. Yui came rushing to class just as the bell rang.

"Sorry, I didn't set my alarm clock today." -Yui

"It's okay Yui as long as you're here everything is going to be fine." -Hina

"But how did you forget to set your alarm clock Yui? Aren't you pretty diligent about those type of things?" -Akari

"Well you see, when I was studying last night, I passed out on my table so I wasn't able to set my alarm. I guess my mom moved me over to my bed after I passed out." -Yui

We all laughed. The bell rang and we got ready for class. Today felt super long for some reason. It was like I was waiting for something, hoping that school would just end earlier. I found myself dozing off in the middle of class thinking about Atsuki. Is this what you call love? I already confirmed to myself that I like Atsuki but I thought this feeling would go away. Was it because of his looks? I don't want to like someone only for their looks. But he's so kind and gentle. He just feels like the type of guy you want to be around. The person you can depend on. Ugh, what do I do?

"Oh, Akari, aren't you tutoring Atsuki today?... Akari!" -Hina

"Huh! What? Oh yeah I'm tutoring him today." -Akari

"Are you alright Akari? You don't seem to be yourself right now." -Yui

"I don't know. I just can't stop thinking about Atsuki. It's like there's this feeling of wanting to be by his side. What do I do with this feeling?" -Akari

I felt like there was something that I needed to do but I just couldn't get myself to do it. It's like my mind was holding me back. I felt frustrated. I just wanted to cry.

"Akari, this feeling that you have is called love, accept it. Today, your duty is to confess to him." -Hina

"W-What! Confess to him!? Are you crazy!" -Akari

"Akari, the only way you can get rid of the feeling that you have right now is to confess to him." -Yui

"What if he doesn't see me in the same way? What do I do then? I don't wanna ruin the relationship that I have right now. We just started to talk to each other and I don't want that to end." -Akari

"If he doesn't talk to you after you confess to him, then he's not a man. That just means that he's too weak to confront you. So go for it. Do it for yourself!" -Hina

"Yeah! Go for it Akari I'm rooting for you!" -Yui

"Thanks, guys. I don't know what I would do without you guys." -Akari

"That's what friends are for!" -Yui

I felt more confident after that. I can't believe that today, I, Akari, will confess my love to Atsuki.

*Ding Dong Dong Ding*

I packed my things and headed for the library. During lunch, I told Atsuki that we're doing the tutor session in the library today. I had to prepare myself. I planned on confessing my love for Atsuki right after the tutoring. As I left the door to the library, I looked back at Hina and Yui. Both of them smiled at me hoping for the best.

"Sorry for asking you to tutor me Akari. I hope this isn't a bother." -Atsuki

"Don't worry about it. I'm doing it because I want to that's all." -Akari

"Thank you so much!" -Atsuki

Our tutoring session lasted about two hours. For the first hour or so, it was us doing our homework and Atsuki asking me questions about the homework that he had. It seems as though he lacks in math and science but is pretty good in history and Japanese. I felt super nervous the entire time that I sat next to him. Every time he leaned towards me to ask a question, I could feel his warmth. The face he makes when he can't seem to understand the problem, he looked like the most adorable thing in the world. I couldn't help but stare. During the second half, I was teaching him all the things that I prepared the night before. I noticed that he lacked in science and math so I focused more on that side of my notes.

"Ah, I messed up. Akari, do you have an eraser I can borrow?" -Atsuki

"Yeah here." -Akari

As I reached my hand out to give him the eraser, it dropped on the floor. I reached down to get it when I touched something else. It was Atsuki's hand! Rough yet soft. A boy's hand is big compared to a girl's hand. My heart skipped a beat. I could feel it pounding faster and faster. Soon I lost control of my body. My mouth suddenly opened by itself.

"Atsuki, I-I..." -Akari

"Yeah?" -Atsuki

"I-I think you got number three wrong." -Akari

"Really? Oh, you're right! Sorry my bad." -Atsuki

I couldn't do it. I couldn't confess my feelings to him. My heart wanted to go ahead and tell him but my mind stopped myself. Well, I guess I'm stuck with this one-sided love for the rest of my high school life. We both walked out of school. It was 5 p.m., sunset. I looked up into the sky. Clouds, slowly passing by. Must be nice to be a cloud. To just go with the flow. I wanted to cry. I wanted to leave and cry.

"Well, see you tomorrow Atsuki." -Akari

"Yeah, see you tomorrow!" -Atsuki

I walked down the staircase that leads down to the entrance of the school. As I took the last step down those stairs, Atsuki told me something that I did not expect at all.

"Akari, I have something to tell you! I love you! Please go out with me!"