Andy

Andy was the perfect boy, he had no regrets.

I met Andy when I was assisting the university for the third time. I cannot recall why I decided to attend an educational institution yet again. I remember walking towards the exit wanting to get home, and as I was rounding the corner I bumped into him, I realized that meant I had touched him, he looked up and smiled at me. I wish I could've said I felt regret but truth to be told, I did not.

"Silly me, I should have paid attention to where I was going,"

He chuckled a bit at my comment, he was good-looking, but he was not my usual pick, mainly because I did not find anything out of the way and special about him. Since I did not have anything better to do I decided to take a chance on him. Well, I would not have known he was not the only one to be hurt, turns out Mr. Perfect was taken.

He probably needed a release from his uptight life. Just by the looks of him, you could tell his type, perfect grades, scholarship, and a perfect girlfriend... maybe not so perfect. He needed a break from all the pressure, and guess who he bumped into? Me, too bad because I would ruin his life and leave him crying and begging for his old life.

"No, I am so sorry... um"

"Calliope,"

I walked past him looking behind once and winking, the boy stared and kept staring until I turned around the next corner, the next day I caught his gaze lingering on me various times and that is when his pitiful girlfriend noticed.

╡✥╞

"Stay AWAY from Andy," warned the girl in front of me.

"Darling, you can not control a heart,"

I could, it took time but I could. She started to get jealous, she kissed him in front of me trying to ignite something. I did not feel even the tiniest droplet of jealousy, why should I? I already marked him as mine. It was so comical how she had to kiss him to make him feel, on the other hand, I only had to wink.

╡✥╞

We shared our first kiss in the parking lot. He had told me all about his life and how tiring his girlfriend could be.

"I love her," he had said. Lies burning in his eyes.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I know it by the way I feel," he had explained.

I came close to his face but it was him who kissed me, he wanted that, not his petty girlfriend. In that kiss, I felt myself starting to get closer to his soul and spirit.

"But this feels better,"

╡✥╞

He broke up with his girlfriend the next day, he had been one of my easiest picks, he wanted to fall madly in love, and he did. I did not know what to take from him, he was not exactly an artist, just a happy youth who had bumped into the wrong person. I realized he only had happiness, and that was something I wanted.

"Why did you do that?" I asked.

I had to be something different for him, something out of his cycle of existence and being empathetic with the girl that had threatened me, being daring sometimes and sweet other times. Trying to understand sometimes and moody sometimes. Unpredictable.

"You push me to be better,"

That is what he said, but that was not true, he just felt better around me, but he said that with sincerity. His happiness entered me, I started trading bits of his happiness with myself, making myself that feeling of happiness.

"I love you,"

He was direct because he did not know another way to say it, I shot the same words back with lacking sincerity, because this time I did not fall in love, Muses always fell in love, unique cases were the ones where we didn't. Muses only feel love, the rest of us are empty. Andy was the pick that I did not pick, his destiny did, I did not offer to empty him and neither did he. Picks like these ones made me think of bigger forces, forces bigger than the connections we made. He said he loved me, he gave me his happiness hoping for release, hope is foolish.

╡✥╞

"You will always be with me right?"

"Always,"

I lied probably for the 100th time in that year, but he was still a boy, he may have been smart and in college but he had always been protected, always in a bubble, a suffocating one. He was still a boy with so much to learn about the world, I was probably his first real love and I did not even love him. His happiness was decreasing, and he was noticing not only because my emotional response towards him was close to zero but because he did not feel the same, he often told me how empty he felt and how I was the last thing worth living for. He probably felt special and he was not, my presence has been part of so many lives throughout history, so many things I have taken away. I understood why he felt special, I made them feel special so they would give me everything without asking twice.

╡✥╞

As soon as his last wisp of happiness was gone I exited the college on the pretext of not enough funding, he offered me some which I politely declined. I was in touch with him for a few days, days where he would cry and hold onto me in his room, days when he called me, texted me, visited me every day so the emptiness inside could be filled. He thought I was giving him a break, I was giving happiness and genuine love but I was only doing what I needed to survive, my duty if it could be called that. Empty other people to fill me up.

"Go and get back with your girlfriend, make things right,"

Those were the last words I told him, his life was ruined because of me. I told him that because he may obey for his sake.

I had to leave in the middle of the night so he would not find out, he was one of my most unique picks, when I left a weight was lifted from my shoulders, but I added a weight to him.

He killed himself.

His Happiness is Mine.