31 An earnest apology

I am troubled. No, it's not a young maiden's romantic trouble or something like that... Although I guess that would be pretty fun. However, currently I am extremely single and have no redeemable qualities, so I am not particularly worried about that part. And no, I am not troubled because I have to start from the very bottom and learn how to control Qi. That's pretty much the fun part of my life, if you ask me. I've been diligently learning under the vastly experienced ancient gold dragon sensei of mine. He is a good teacher though, now that I think about it. It's been pretty easy for me to learn under him as his disciple because he doesn't make it too complex for me. I guess that's because he pretty much knows everything that is there to know about me.

Anyway, speaking of Goldy, he is the one giving me a troubled feeling. Why, you ask? Well, recently I've been noticing that Goldy has been invading my privacy a little too much. Too much so that I literally don't have to say anything in order for him to understand. Ok, it seemed pretty cool at first. I felt as if we were two close buddies who knew literally everything about each other that they didn't actually have to communicate. However, the more I thought about it, it was like I was the one being left out because I don't know what he is thinking and that he knows exactly what I am thinking, so it feels pretty weird to be in that situation.

And I do know that knowing exactly what I am thinking at one moment is pretty useful when it comes to explaining stuff while he is teaching me about Qi control. So, I am not exactly saying that is bad but yeah…. Why am I lying to myself? Like, it's bad... It's excruciating because now it's like I can't bad mouth people in my mind. Humans are flawed personalities who show a pleasant exterior while having a corrupt mind. And I wasn't any different either. I had a lot of frustrations; I hated certain people and at times I might actually nitpick someone's behavior if I don't actually like how they are acting before me, even though that person might be the one that I actually am fond of. And I like to believe that Goldy is one such person whom I'm kinda fond of.

But think about this. What if the person that you are fond of was actually capable of doing stuff like mind reading, and they actually listened to your inner thoughts saying that they are acting like crap one day, and you don't like it. Even if you don't care about what that person actually thinks about the things you thought about because you didn't mean any harm with that, it might prove to be annoying if that person ends up sulking before you or worse, they may try to break off their relationship with you. In my case though, the worst case scenario would be Goldy actually trying to freaking kill me.

Anyway, that's me considering the feelings of the person opposite to me. Now, let me tell you how I feel. I feel like shite. I am fine with him picking up the general questions that I have in my mind but alongside those questions, I do have some idiotic ones that I don't speak of, and it is really irritating when he makes fun of me by bringing up those questions in particular. Like, dude! I wasn't gonna ask you that! I know I will sound like an idiot if I did! Give me some privacy, dammit!

As I said before, I didn't think much of it in the beginning because sometimes certain things overwhelm me and I would end up speechless. In such situations, him being able to read my mind actually helps. And if you ask me, I wouldn't mind if he peeks into that mess of a mind maybe once or twice to satisfy his curiosity.

However, the problem here is that the amount of time that he peeks into my monologue is at an alarming rate. If this goes on, I don't think I can live my life peacefully. Look, even now I am kind of afraid that he might be listening into my thoughts and if he is... Well, you heard me, right? I don't want you peeking in like this every other time.

Anyway, considering that he actually isn't listening to me (which would be a one in a million odds), I have to think about some sort of defense against his actions. This is not the first time I've been contemplating it. The first time that I did was a few days ago and the first thing that came into my mind when I thought of a contingency plan was a mental skill that puts a barrier around your mind making it difficult for people to know what you are actually thinking. However, there were two things that I had to consider. First, it's gonna take up a slot in my ten skills. This was a big thing to consider as I didn't want a terrible skill to be added into my repertoire. Although the mind barrier skill wasn't that bad of a skill, it was way too normal for me to consider. If it was an advanced skill, maybe I would have considered it. Secondly, we are talking about a gold dragon here. Do you really think that a lousy normal skill like the mind barrier will actually be able to tank his mental attacks? Of course not! Well, maybe, if it is leveled up to a certain extent it can do the task, but right now it will be pretty much useless.

Upon understanding that skill wouldn't be particularly helpful for me, I thought about getting an equipment or a certain talisman of sorts. Then again I had to consider the fact that he is the gold dragon. I only know of equipment that I had seen in the game and I don't think any of them will even minutely help me in my mental warfare against him. Well, I guess these are the troubles that I have to deal with becoming a disciple of the Ancient Dragon. It's still nothing compared to the stuff that I have seen or heard from people, considering that Goldy is far more lenient than any other person in this world. From helping a person like me to bearing with my idiocy, I'd say that he has done more than a good job this far. So maybe, it's my turn to be lenient I guess?

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"Oy!" I was diligently training on my Qi circulation when Goldy called me out.

"What is it?" I asked. Normally he doesn't interrupt while I am busy with my Qi circulation… . Unless I did something completely wrong. So, I was kinda worried when I looked up to him. However, when I did so, he turned his head away from me. seriously though, what did I do wrong?

"You might be thinking what you did wrong for me to call you out like this, right?" He asked.

"Well, you can listen to my thoughts, so I guess you know that already." I replied.

"No, I didn't peek in your thoughts this time I just made a random guess." He spoke.

"Huh?" I was confused about his actions.

"Well, I happen to hear your recent monologue, and it seemed like you were pretty unsatisfied with me trying to barge into your personal space, so I thought it would be nice to give you back your privacy that you were so desperately hoping for." He explained.

I sighed. "Hmm, you heard it, huh? I kinda expected it, but I never thought you would take it that seriously. And now that you did, you do remember what I said by the end of that monologue right?" I asked, to which he nodded his head. "Good. It's not like I hate the idea of you getting to see what's going through my head, which is absolute garbage most of the time but if you are that interested, I don't feel like stopping you. Anyway as I said, I am not against that prospect. What I am saying is that it could be a bit frustrating when you nitpick almost everything that goes through my mind, so I would like you to avoid doing that from now on." I replied.

"I am sorry. I didn't consider your thoughts when I did it and in hindsight I should have probably been considerate about how you felt about it as well. And for that, I truly apologize once again." He spoke. He looks like he genuinely repented on his previous actions, which is nice to see, since I haven't seen many who readily accept their mistakes and learn something from it.

"Nah, it's fine as long as you understand your mistakes and reflect on it." I smiled towards him as I spoke. After Goldy felt a sense of peace, we got back to my Qi circulation training.

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