4 ~Chapter Four~

I sat on the floor with my back against the

frame of my bed. I had my knees pulled up to

my chest and my phone was on the floor in front of me. I stared at a text that had flashed across my screen two hours ago. My eyes ached from crying and my cheeks were stained with mascara.

Vic:

Why didn't you tell me…

I couldn't seem to find a logical answer to his question. Suddenly, the typing icon popped up under his name.

Vic:

Alice…

Let me help you…

Talk to me… please…

Me:

…I can't

There was a sudden tap from behind me. I stood and turned to see Vic outside my window. I walked over quickly and opened it. I looked out to see how he was up here and saw that he was standing on the roof right outside my window. I stepped aside for him to come in, pressing a finger to my lips signaling him to keep quiet.

"What are you doing?" I asked once he was in.

"I needed to check on you…" he said.

I walked over to my bedroom door and locked it in case my mother came up. When I turned toward him he was staring at me. I looked down and sat on the bed.

"I'm sorry…" he said, hesitantly sitting beside me on the bed.

I lied back and after a few seconds, he did the same. We just lied there, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars on my ceiling.

"How long..." he asked.

"Well, let's see," I replied, "I'm 16 now, and it started when I was about 4. So just about 12 years."

I felt him exhale and I looked at him. I realized how close he was but I didn't move. I studied his features while he stared at my ceiling. My eyes drew out the curve of his lips, up to the tip of his nose and down the bridge. I smiled as my brain unintentionally memorized the way his eyelashes fluttered every few second, and the way he furrowed his brow ever so slightly when he was thinking.

He turned his head in my direction, about to say something before he realized I was looking at him. We both froze, still facing each other. I could feel the tip of his nose on mine and I blushed.

Vic started leaning in when someone began banging on my bedroom door.

"Shit…" I said, "Closet!"

I watched him hide and made sure no one would see him if they came in. I then walked over to my door and unlocked and opened it. My mother stood on the other side when I opened the door. She looked me over with a disgusted look before holding something out.

"You forgot this downstairs," she said, holding out my blades, "don't bother coming down for dinner."

"Mkay," I replied.

She looked me up and down again before walking away. I closed the door and locked it. I heard the closet door open and I turned around to see Vic looking at me with concern in his eyes. I looked down and walked over to my bathroom where I put the blades into the cupboard before he could ask what it was.

When I walked back into the room Vic was standing next to my desk, looking down at something. I went over and stood next to him to see what it was. I realized it was my sketchbook.

"You're really good, you know," he murmured.

"Eh," I shrugged, "I'm decent at best."

"You're really not. You're amazing," he paused,

"I should probably go…"

I cleared my throat and nodded slightly without looking at him. I listened as he walked over to the open window and climbed out, quietly shutting it.

I strode back over to the window and watched him walked back to his house before I continued towards my bathroom, locking the door behind me.

'Looks like I'm wearing long sleeves for a while.'

The next day I pulled my sleeves down further as I walked into class. I looked to the back and saw Vic looking at so I quickly looked down. I sat down in the seat next to him and put my headphones on as he looked at me with concern.

I kept my eyes on the front of the class for the whole period. Halfway through I felt my phone buzz but I ignored it. I could feel Vic staring at me, hoping I would check it, but I never it. I watched the teacher intently in each class I had with Vic with headphones on each hour.

When lunch came I tried to make it outside before he reached me but I couldn't get around the other people fast enough. Vic spotted me and started walking in my direction before I could get around the stupid lunch line. Just as I finally found a clear path through the line, my wrist seared in pain as I felt a hand close just above the lacerations on my forearm.

I tried my best not to cry as I faced Vic. Hurt and anger chased each other around in his eyes as he stared at me so intensely I was forced to look down.

"Why are you avoiding me?" he asked. I could hear the disguised hurt in his voice.

"C-can we please talk about this somewhere else?" I asked, trying to pull my hand away.

"Fine," he said, finally dropping my wrist, "but I expect a full explanation."

I murmured a quick "okay" and turned to lead him outside. I took a quick peek down my sleeve and saw that a few of the cuts had opened, and were beginning to bleed.

'Shit… better make this fast.'

The second we got outside he grabbed my wrist again to make sure I wasn't trying to get away.

"Please let go of my arm," I said, struggling to keep my composure.

He finally let go and I lightly rubbed it to give the impression he was merely holding on too tight.

"What's going on…" he asked, "please."

"It'd be better if we weren't friends, Vic," I say quietly.

"W-what? No. I'm not just gonna walk away like that," he said angrily.

"You have to!" I shouted back, "You have no clue what you've gotten yourself into! This is way over your head…"

"I don't care," he said, "I can handle whatever comes. I will protect you."

"You don't understand!" I yelled.

"Then make me understand!" he shouted, "I just want to help you…"

I could see his heart breaking a little behind his eyes; eyes that should never have held this much pain.

Suddenly, the bell rang and I looked down, taking a deep breath.

"Look, we can continue this after school. I apologize for avoiding you but maybe you'll see why later…" I said before walking away, leaving Vic standing by himself.

Vic's P.O.V

I stood, still staring, where Alice left me.

'There's something she isn't telling me, I know it. I just want to help her; why can't she see that?!'

I picked up a rock and chucked it at the wall where it broke into three pieces. The bell rang, bringing me out of my thoughts.

"Shit!" I yelled as I ran off to my class.

Alice P.O.V.

I walked into the art classroom and opened my laptop. I forgot my drawing supplies this morning so I had to draw on that instead.

I felt Vic sit next to me and I ignored him yet again. After setting everything up, I didn't hesitate to begin. I put my headphones on and played 'Just Like You' by Falling in Reverse on high volume and dove into my creation.

I zoned out for at the next hour passed and I felt a small nudge on my shoulder. I looked up to see Vic standing over me with his phone in my face, displaying the time. I nodded and began packing up, conscious of his eyes on me the whole time. After I had it all in my bag I grabbed my phone and sent a picture to Vic.

Me:

This might be the last one I give you so don't lose it…

He looked at me curiously before checking it. Shock crossed his features as he opened the message. As the final bell rang I left Vic standing there. I finally navigated my way outside when someone pulled me back by my bicep. I suddenly felt two strong arms envelop me and I knew, judging by the smell of his cologne, it was Vic. I stood there for a minute before hesitantly returning the hug.

When he let go, he gave me a sad smile and walked away. I blinked back a few sudden tears and continued home with my headphones on.