2 FRED AND ME

Well lets me explain about Fred and me we have had a pretty long friendship we served together in two world wars and we have changed our identity on several occasions. I bet you are wondering how we passed the physical to get into the Army huh. Well in Hollywood again lets you think we have no heartbeat that we are the undead correct? Well, we are not the undead cause we have never been dead, to begin with, that is because once you're infected, you do not die!

So, let me explain a little about being turned into a vampire what happens. Your body does not change other than you stop aging and that you develop fangs that can retract and extend on a thought. The thirst for blood is not overwhelming it more like a strong craving just like some crave a double bacon cheeseburger if you smell it. We do not go around attacking and drinking human blood well at least me, and Fred doesn't. So, have in the past, and that is what fueled Hollywood and an author named Stoker who got famous writing about a renowned vampire Dracul.

Fred and I have been friends like I said since he found me in the woods and infected me by biting and sucking some of my blood. Weird at first, I thought, but I understand now he was tired of being alone and he wanted a friend. He could have talked to me first instead of feeding one me I told him. However, he smiles and says oh wow that would have gone great me showing up in the woods and tell you "oh he can I suck some of your blood and turn you into a vampire?" we laugh about it cause I would probably have to drive a spike through his heart.

Being vampires doesn't mean we can't die other than a spike through the heart anything else will not kill us. Well ok, let's talk about why we choose Oklahoma. It is a wide-open prairie were we are, and they raise tons of grain and have thousands and thousands of acres of nothing but wheat fields, so we don't have to worry about meeting someone we use to know from a different time. Be kind of hard to hide are secret and things if we met one of the people, we use to fight the war with, and we show no sign of aging.

Well ok everyone Fred is sitting here, and we decided we like to go fishing and catch some catfish. Yep, that is right we like to fish and things. I bet you never heard about a vampire going fishing, have you! We like to catch them and give them away to anyone especially the hungry or elderly. We try and be a good member of the community and help people we can and if a stranger comes into town, we stay away from them till we get to know them. There is a group that hunts us down and wants to kill us they are called the ORDER.

The ORDER is a group of vampire killers that have hunted us since as long as we can remember they are a group of Jesuit priest who has sworn an oath to wipe us out and they have almost succeeded in doing so. That is another reason we live here in Oklahoma because you do not see Jesuits here, you can spot them a mile off literally. By the way that is the reason, that I didn't tell you where we live in Oklahoma so that way they can't find us.

All right here is some of the story's I like to share about Fred and my life's adventures that have taken us from the old west to the gold fields of Alaska. I hope that you will enjoy these great tails.

In the summer of 1789, we got the bright idea we wanted to go out to California and see what all the fuss was about. Well, we boarded a train in Syracuse New York that was heading to Denver Colorado then on to San Francisco. We both were nervous and were also very excited to get out of the east coast we had several close calls with Order in New York so far, and we had both about been captured.

We were westbound on the train we had made it from New York to Saint Louise Missouri, and a couple of days we had sore behind from sitting on the bench seats, so we both decided we were going to get a motel room and relax a day or two and then continue our trip westward. We got a nice room in the best motel we could find we went to the barber and had a warm bath then we went out to see the town.

Well, Fred decided that we need to get some culture, so we went to the opera house and bought two tickets for the next show and went in. Right away we could tell we had gotten our selves into a trap.